I need your help guys!

Us girls, especially those of us hiking alone, have had it drilled into our heads that it is unsafe to reveal that we are, in fact, alone, and that it could be dangerous to tell others where we are planning to camp for the night. So why is it that 90 percent of hikers I encounter on the trail ask me two things: am I alone, and where am I headed for the night???

STOP ASKING THOSE QUESTIONS, PLEASE! There are a million other questions you could ask to get a fellow hiker chatting. Are you thru-hiking? Where are you from? Where's the next water source? How's that restaurant I heard about at the next town? On and on and on...there should be no need to ask me where I'm camping, and whether I'm hiking alone.

And if you do ask those questions, I will lie to you.

So, please, guys, help me out here. Help out, first, by changing your habits on the trail, bearing in mind the special safety concerns us girls face while hiking alone when you encounter us and start asking questions. And second by teaching others to do the same.

Me and so many other female hikers will thank you for it!

Pokey

These silly comments could be conversational recon to see if it would be ok to get to know you better - like a nice conversation around a campfire...

...or maybe there is limited space in the next shelter and they want to ask you the same questions they just asked the guys...

Just to be safe...maybe you should contact the Human Resources department.

TTF

Just my read on this, but that is normal trail conversation. Sort of like talking about trail conditions to someone going the other direction or talking about who is eating what at a camp. I'd ask the same question of a guy or a girl on the trail, especially if we are going the same way so I can decide to hike ahead, hold back, or go to the destination I was planning on based on how I perceive the person. So say if I were planning to go to the same shelter as you, but I don't want to be around other people that night, then I will likely keep on moving or stop short based on how you respond.

If it bothers you don't answer the person asking. It is sort of like how people ask me if I have ever killed someone because they know I am a soldier. I just tell them I do not answer that question. Maybe some other former service members do but I don't. I get it all the time but I don't feel I need to talk about it. It doesn't bother me that people ask, only if they keep at it after I tell them I am not going to talk about it.

Funny, Sgt. Rock, I just now noticed your line about not answering the question "how many people have you killed?" I made the mistake once of asking my boyfriend, who served 10 years in the Air Force, that question. I'll never ask it again! Of anyone!

I asked the question innocently, not realizing it was taboo. But once someone pointed out the problem, I knew better.

Same kinda point I'm trying to get at with my post...

When someone asks me if I have ever killed anyone, I always say, "Add One". They say, what does that mean? And I say, whatever the number is, i'm gonna Add One if you ever ask me again.

Oh, I think somehow I failed to post a couple other intended replies. Bear with me...I'm new at this.

I meant to say, thanks for the snide comments, Time to Fly. I'm not asking for political correctness, just a little common courtesy.

Sgt. Rock, the fact that it's "normal trail conversation" is why I posted this plea to begin with. I'm hoping that it will stop being "normal trail conversation." If you want to know about how crowded a shelter will be at the next stop, then ask about it directly, not "where you headed tonight?" Just tiny changes in habits could bring so much peace of mind to us gals on the trail.

Just try to remember some of the specific safety concerns us girls are thinking about...things you guys, thankfully, don't have to even consider. I know, from talking to other female hikers, that I am totally not alone in this...

Thanks for your consideration and non-snide reply, Sgt. Rock.

Oh, my former Air Force boyfriend will love that one!

But you're getting me off the subject...

My apologies Pokey. Just so you know, the snide comment was made with a smile.

TTF

i think you're right, pokey. where are you spending the night -- that's a stupid question for a guy to ask a girl on the trail. it's sure to make the girl uncomfortable and ought not to be answered by the girl.

Pokey - when we talked in SNP did I ask any of those questions? If so I apologize.

Uh huh.

Well, at least you read my post, and maybe you'll think twice about asking a gal "where you headed tonight." Maybe...we can only hope...

I am just trying to get you guys thinking about it. I'm really not trying to get all PC on you. Just think about it.

Hog on Ice...Shoot, I don't remember you! Did you go by a different name? Refresh my memory!

I honestly don't recall anyone in Shenandoah asking me any hinky questions. I would have remembered, too, since I was already a little "on guard" with the shelters so close to the roads. Shenandoah, actually, was a great experience for me -- great trails, great people, great (if temporary) hiking partners), plus food every other day. I loved Shenandoah!

No problem Pokey. I try to be unobtrusive into others hikes anyway. I try not to look or act like the crazy hiker type after a hike in 2001 where I was minding my own business sitting by a creek on the trail when a group of three came up NOBO (I was SOBO) it was two women and one guy. The girls stopped back and waited for the guy to come up and make sure I was safe before they came forward. I thought it was awful funny at the time that I was insidious looking enough to require all that.

well I think we were talking at Hightop Hut but I am not real sure about it - about all I remember is talking to a woman with the trailname of Pokey - as for names I usually introduce myself as "my name is HOI unless you want to be formal about it then its Hog On Ice" - generally I wear a long sleaved dirty white shirt and a beat up white western style straw hat - I'm a rather heavy 6'2" older man, bald if you saw me with my hat off, a lot of grey hair and grey stubble usually

Pokey - I'm seriously not trying to be a jerk here, so I hope you don't take it that way....

If you're nervous or uncomfortable about being alone out there, why do it? Or why not take a partner? Or why not carry protection of some sort?

My wife is a pretty cautious person when it comes to doing anything by herself. Most of the time, I think her caution is unneccessary, but sometimes it is. Being on the trail alone, away from help, for months at a time....I honestly don't know how comfortable I'd be with her doing that, especially without some form of protection.

Just curious :D

I hike with my wife, and we always ask that question. I don't know that I could remember NOT to ask it of woman because it is such a common question. But I had in fact thought about that, but also though that it didn't matter that much, since I know that I'm not asking for nefarious reasons.

The point here is, the person asking for a bad reason won't try to change his habits, so it doesn't matter if the good people stop asking you, because it's the scary ones that matter.

What's more important is that you have a good, convincing answer that will keep someone that could/would do you wrong from guessing where you'll end up that night.

I think the most convincing answer is "I haven't made up my mind yet what kind of miles I want to put in." However, it's usually pretty easy to guess what shelter you will be aiming at. A more diversionary response would be say that you are hiking a few miles past the shelter/campsite you are aiming at.

Just a thought...

Gravity

Hey Pokey,

Yeah, I try not to do that, but will try harder in future.

When people are going in my direction, I am often curious where they are headed (especially if it's raining). But I try to say "I'm heading for whatever shelter, are you?", that sort of thing. Most of the people I chat with seem to be going in the other direction, and then it's all about where did you sleep last night.

I have many times encountered women on the trail who didn't want to yield any information at all, maybe not even if they were hiking northbound or southbound (as if I couldn't tell)! I totally understand this, though, and I never take it personally.

Just because 99% of the us guys out there are kind hearted and totally harmless, doesn't mean that that's enough.

I think Gravityman's comment about being non-committal or vague with your reply when asked about your hiking plans or destination makes a great deal of sense.

And I think your being vague or even dishonest about who you're hiking with is also perfectly understandable.

If a question or query makes you in the least bit uncomfortable, you're under no obligation to answer it.

Happy hiking.

Oh, darlings, I do, indeed carry a form or two of "protection." And I do feel totally safe on the AT.

However, that doesn't mean I don't want to take precautions. They are the same precautions other women on the trail take -- to not tell anyone that we are alone, andto not reveal where we are planning to camp. Very simple. So I am only asking for the men on the trail to be aware of these concerns...

I will say, I am thrilled that my post has touched off a dialogue. That's the first step.

Perhaps I will catch other opinions later. For now, I must go -- the trail is calling my name...

Thanks, guys,

Pokey

PS: There were a couple of us Pokeys out there this year; I think you met a different one, as I don't recall you! Too bad -- you sound like a cool cat!

Ah, but Jack, why can't you guys be a little more sensitive to the fact that those are totally inappropriate questions to ask???

Ya, I'm trying to change a whole way of thinking here, but, heck, it's worth a try...maybe over time we'll get it right.

Ok now that I think about it a bit more I think it was Pokey the Pink Squid that I was talking to so it probably wasn't you.

I think people have already answered your last question.....the fact is, in a tight-knit "commmunity" of people like thru-hikers, asking someone their daily plans is considered a perfectly normal thing to do. Let's say there are half a dozen people in a shelter early one morning, eating breakfast, packing up, whatever. Asking another hiker what their plans are for the day is absolutely a typical, normal thing to do, especially if it's a hiker you know. To term these queries as "totally inappropriate" is simply not always the case; a lot of times, it's a perfectly natural, perfectly appropriate thing to do.

And as has been pointed out several times, you have every right to answer these questions as you wish.....or you can not answer them at all.

But to expect guys to have some sort of goo-goo sensitivity training in regards to questions that on many occasions are perfectly natural ones....well, that's expecting a lot. You say you're "trying to change a way of thinking." Well, good luck. Hikers are always naturally curious about what other hikers are up to, especially if it's a hiker they know. And 99.9 percent of the time, these questions are inoccuous, casual, and absolutely have no ulterior motive or sinister connotations.

But as I said earlier, you of course have the right to deal with these questions any way you wish to.

Adding to what's already been mentioned above:

Also remember that the very ones you trust the least are the ones you'll hope are around when you need them the most..

Now that you have me thinking... : )

There is a free-flow of information on the trail through questions like this that is, frankly, kinda fun to keep tapped into. What you are asking is for everyone to stop part of that normal trail conversation.

Are these comments really totally inappropriate? You are among kindred spirits 99.9 % of the time on the AT, not people to be afraid of. You have made a decision to carry protection and you have the option to choose not to give out information.

Here is a serious question: Do you feel afraid when a male hiker asks you if you are headed to the next shelter, or comforted that you will not be alone?

TTF

Pokey, I'm another female. As the fellows have said, 'Where are you staying' is a common question among backpackers and most don't give a darn if you're a girl or guy when asking. Talking about where you're staying, the last and next trail town, trail magic and trail conditions / weather are just part of the fabric of backpackers' society. If the question makes you uncomfortable, tell them you haven't decided yet. No one will question that answer.

As for 'are you hiking alone?' - I personally have not had many people ask and most were other women with someone who were afraid to hike alone. If I had any hinky feeling at all - I would say I was with others - just hiking a bit faster or slower than the group.

sounds like someone is a little paranoid :eek:

..........
(someone already said what I tried to say, only they said it better)

I really want to say something here, but I know it'll come out as being sexist or insensitive somehow. So I'll keep my mouth shut for once :D

So, where is Salem do you live.....:D

I think the first question "are you alone?" is a little too personal but the second "where are you headed for the night?" could be construed as a normal trail community type question. I mean it is sort of a safety thing. If you say you are headed somewhere and do not show up it might raise some alarms for some people after a while.. You could be dying at the bottom of the hill. You might just answer with more long term goals like Damascus by friday or something like that...

Pokey2006,

You advise, “I need your help guys!” and ask, “STOP ASKING ... am I alone, and where am I headed for the night???”

There is something unrealistic about your request.

You hope to change the behavior of, I suspect, most hikers, male and female. Most male hikers don’t read this website. [Sorry, Sgt Rock, but I really believe this.] And, not all who read this website are going to read this thread.

You have the option to be dishonest. Remember, once someone realizes you lied to them, their opinion of you is forever affected by that discovery.

I often innocently will ask hikers those questions. I have great admiration for the courage of solo women hikers. (The reason for my admiration is, of itself, sad commentary on our society today.) I often can provide some information about what they can expect ahead. I have found myself stopping short, to keep from asking either question of female hikers, and have realized my halting just had opposite the desired effect, increasing the anxiety of a frightened female. We both would have been better off had I just done the big no-no and asked the dreaded questions.

Oddly enough, solo female hikers are sufficiently self assured that they answer those two questions.

Let me suggest, when asked either question, you respond with something like, “I’d rather not say.” Or, “can’t we talk about something else?” Both responses tell me you’re afraid and reluctant. This is totally understandable and won't antagonize any well-meaning questioner. If my return response is off-putting for you, you’ve just learned something about me which could become very important, something you may otherwise not have known.

It seems an unreasonable expectation that half the hiking world will change its behavior. Just a thought.

hey pokey2006, i don't think your request is unreasonable. for the sake of harmony and respect i won't ask those questions. seems simple enough

If I was to ask a "none of my business" question to a solo female, or more than one female hiker(s) it would be "Whats your sexual preference aka: Are you gay?"

i think pokey is probably referring to hikers she doesn't know walking up to here and asking her where she's going to spend the night. there are more than a few sketchy characters on the trail. in fact, there are a bunch of bums out there who'd be sleeping under a damn bridge if they weren't curling up in shelters on the trail. most of these clowns are harmless but you never know, do you? pokey is smart to be careful.

How many people does POKEY know here at WB??

Careful is always good. Paranoid, maybe not so good.

Ridge - Do you ALWAYS have to be a jerk, man?

Coupla thoughts:
1) Those questions are always going to be asked... for good reasons as well as suspect reasons ---- even though no guy in his right mind in town would ask a woman the same things unless it was in a bar near to closing time. Guys are dopes. Get over it. Like the optomist says, "It doesn't get any better than this!" To which the pessimist agrees.

2) Given the unfortunate fact that most guys are going to ask stupid questions on the trail that they wouldn't dare ask in town, a woman would do well to cook up some canned answers that will help her feel more comfortable:
a) "Are you hiking alone?" "Are you kidding? Do I look like a fool? I'm just faster than (the rest of the group, my brothers, those drag-assed recruits)."

b) "Where ya headed?" "DUh, Katahdin?" "I dunno, probably another 7-8 miles." "I'll stop wherever the unit commander says."

at least they didn't ask what's your sign.

Careful is always good. Paranoid, maybe not so good.

Ridge - Do you ALWAYS have to be a jerk, man?

SOOOoooo Sensitive.

Pokey your fears and worries are justified.

Don't camp near forest service roads, trail heads, etc. Plan your day so that this doesn't happen, especially on the weekends.

I've never had a problem on the Trail. Never. Rarely had a problem in town, and camping too close to civilization but NOT directly on the Trail. Mostly problems in town-but very few: don't make it obvious you're hiking alone, and don't go to pubs alone in strange towns.

How many people does POKEY know here at WB??How many people here at WB know RIDGE?:rolleyes:

How many people here at WB know RIDGE?:rolleyes:

How many people know Ed Bell??

Well Ed how long is it going to take for you to call up some of your buddies to vouch for you, or at least make up some kind of story???

The question is SHOULD we want to know Ed Bell or Ridge. :D :D

I don't know either of you.... I think. Do I ?

Well Ed how long is it going to take for you to call up some of your buddies to vouch for you, or at least make up some kind of story???Don't hold your breath too long.:D My point is that asking Pokey "how many people do you know at WB?" seemed to be a strange question. Who cares? As far as made up stories go, I have none. I personally know maybe a couple hikers who are WB members. None are active posters. So what. I joined this board to learn about and share info about hiking, backpacking and the Appalachian Trail. I have "met" quite a few people through this board. Just not in person. No facade here.

The question is SHOULD we want to know Ed Bell or Ridge. :D :D

I don't know either of you.... I think. Do I ? My friends like me, and I love backpacking.:sun I'm a nice enough fella. And, no, we have not met. I'll introduce myself if I ever run into you StarLyte.:)

I agree with Spock.

Shocking as it may seem, not all AT hikers are on White Blaze :eek: You are going to get asked this again. I'm sorry, I may forget & ask myself :rolleyes:

So having a "canned answer" is a good idea. Spock's suggestions are Probably very effective. You answer the question, without actually giving any "real" info.

As always, if: someone, something, a situation, whatever, Makes you feel uncomfortable, Change it! By: moving on, telling others, telling the person you are uncomfortable with, whatever. Even to the point of getting OFF the trail for a time or skipping ahead. The AT will still be there, what made you uncomfortable MAY be gone.

And as I always say "Just cause I'm Paranoid dosn't mean they aint out to get me."



Doctari.

i think the original question is legitamate. a person male or female under certain circumstances should feel apprehensive. i know i in 2008 i will.
underthe right parameters

I've always avoided asking anyone direct questions about camp plans, with one disclaimer: If a brief exchange of pleasantries turns into a conversation, the topic will unavoidably surface. I usually only have time to say "hello" or "nice day today" to at least 90% of hikers I meet while hiking. I would be reluctant to attempt to start a conversation with a solo female hiker. The ones I have talked to initiate the conversation.

I'm guilty, I did it just a few hours ago. After work I drove up Catawba Mtn and hiked a couple of miles south bound. At the register just up from the parking lot were two ladies signing in. My first question was "How far are ya going?" I knew as soon as I asked that I shouldn't had asked that question plus the bad vibes reflected back at me confirmed it. They said it was a hot day and I told them to take care and I continued on up the hill. But, the question is one that just comes out. When in NH this fall I'll just say "Hope you get to where you'll going!" :) Oh BTW, it was The Nuns out on a section hike.

Pokey, great thread. I am a female hiker that hikes solo. I get asked those two questions a lot. And I feel uncomfortable sometimes answering them. But, I answer them most of the time, and I keep my radar up. The thing is, I ask them too, of other female hikers as well. Only once did I feel so uneasy about giving out info that I changed my destination. Even then, I'm sure my fears were unfounded. You can always change your plans.

This is a problematic topic, so I guess I will stop lurking and reply. I hiked the Georgia section of the AT this May and it was my first solo hike. I had read everywhere, including on this website, that as a female solo hiker you should never tell anyone you are hiking alone. This seemed like reasonable advice before I left, but my first day on the trail I realized that everyone who is out hiking for more than a day and sees me will figure out I am alone. If they don't figure it out during the day while hiking, they will definitely know at night if I camp near a shelter. I am relatively inexperienced (or was!) and I liked the comraderie and information/experience of talking with other hikers in the evening and felt the reward was worth the relatively small risk. It didn't take very long for me to realize that the people I really needed to worry about were not the long-distance hikers. I also found that being vague was much more comfortable for me than outright lying, and I feel the most important thing I did for my safety was promise myself before I left that I would trust my instincts ALWAYS. Only once did I choose to move on because someone made me nervous, and I probably didn't need to go, but I felt that listening to that inner voice was really a way of respecting myself. When people asked me where I was heading, after saying "North Carolina!" I would usually just say "as far as I can go today" or I am just taking it easy today," and I have to say I feel that it is my own responsibility to answer in a way I feel comfortable, it isn't someone else's responsibility to shepherd my feelings. That is a big reason I went out to hike by myself. Certainly, from a safety perspective, it would be easier if no one asked me where I was going, but the feeling of isolation that no one cared where I was would be worse, IMO. It is a tricky situation to navigate, though, and I really believe you have to go with your gut instincts. I admire you, Pokey, for raising this issue. Asking people to change the way they interact is always a challenge and a risk. Thanks!

Tell'em you're a trail scout for the Dallas Cheerleaders who are somewhere behind you. Possibly in a creek mud-wrestling.

.... I also found that being vague was much more comfortable for me than outright lying, and I feel the most important thing I did for my safety was promise myself before I left that I would trust my instincts ALWAYS. Only once did I choose to move on because someone made me nervous, and I probably didn't need to go, but I felt that listening to that inner voice was really a way of respecting myself. When people asked me where I was heading, after saying "North Carolina!" I would usually just say "as far as I can go today" or I am just taking it easy today," and I have to say I feel that it is my own responsibility to answer in a way I feel comfortable, it isn't someone else's responsibility to shepherd my feelings. That is a big reason I went out to hike by myself. Certainly, from a safety perspective, it would be easier if no one asked me where I was going, but the feeling of isolation that no one cared where I was would be worse, IMO. It is a tricky situation to navigate, though, and I really believe you have to go with your gut instincts. I admire you, Pokey, for raising this issue. Asking people to change the way they interact is always a challenge and a risk. Thanks! Very nice post and perspective. I really liked the remark: ...it isn't someone else's responsibility to shepherd my feelings.
Nice way to encourage hikers to trust their feelings regardless of the manners exhibited by hikers they happen to talk with. Thanks for adding to the discussion.:sun

If I was to ask a "none of my business" question to a solo female, or more than one female hiker(s) it would be "Whats your sexual preference aka: Are you gay?"


Tell'em you're a trail scout for the Dallas Cheerleaders who are somewhere behind you. Possibly in a creek mud-wrestling.

Are you being intentionally offensive Ridge, or do you just need to put the bottle down for the night?

seriously ridge, lay off the sauce before you start posting threads about allegedly hiking the pct and uploading pictures that someone else took of denali, and saying they were your shots of the sierras. i think we've all had enough for one night.

Houthuse - Very nicely said. Exactly what I wanted to convey, but I couldn't find the words so I abstained :D Also probably has more weight, coming from a woman.

No problem Pokey. I try to be unobtrusive into others hikes anyway. I try not to look or act like the crazy hiker type after a hike in 2001 where I was minding my own business sitting by a creek on the trail when a group of three came up NOBO (I was SOBO) it was two women and one guy. The girls stopped back and waited for the guy to come up and make sure I was safe before they came forward. I thought it was awful funny at the time that I was insidious looking enough to require all that.

Prolly over nightin' yuppies....

Hey, I have a silly question. Wouldn't it be easier to get a man to hike with you, than to try and change everyone on the trail? LOL

If you're that concerned I suggest some martial arts classes ie judo,krav maga etc or perhaps a gun. There's plenty of lightweight models with ample take down power. If you're gonna get a gun learn how to use it properly.

Hey, I have a silly question. .........

You'll probably get a silly answer, if one at all!!!

It's better to have somone think you're a complete idiot than for you to open your mouth and remove all doubt..

Wrong silly answer!!!

.......or perhaps a gun. There's plenty of lightweight models with ample take down power. If you're gonna get a gun learn how to use it properly.

A lot of threads out there on this one. If you are serious about this one, keep in mind it is illegal to have one for most of the trail. If anything else look into pepper spray. But then again, this is a pretty loaded topic.

It didn't take very long for me to realize that the people I really needed to worry about were not the long-distance hikers.

:welcome Welcome houthuse!
As dad to a teenage female backpacker, I assure you and Pokey this topic is very appropriate, and welcome.

Prolly over nightin' yuppies....

Well I thought that at the time about the girls but not the guy. I had seen him before.

The guy I had seen at Amicalola falls about a week earlier. He was about 20 years old from Florida and was there with his parents who were dropping him off up at the FS42 trail head. When I first saw him he was getting a ranger at the park to do a shake down for him on his gear. From the conversation he was a former boyscout about to do his first long distance section by himself (I think he was going to Fontanna) while I was just leaving my car there and getting a shuttle from Hacksaw up to NOC the next day as I had just driven 11 hours to get there.

I found out later about the women. A few days later I hit Neels Gap and stopped for ice cream, iodine, sodas, laundry, shower, etc. While I was hanging out there I talked with one of the guys working there. Said he had done a shake down on these two women from Florida that were hiking the AT for the first time and going from Springer to Hiawasii I think. They had stopped at NOC way overloaded and beat down. The guy there said between the two of them they mailed back about 60 pounds in gear before heading out again.

So basically Mr Boyscout met the Newbie Twins somewhere on the trail and they became a group. I imagine they got used to him and let him be their boyscout defender. I was probably his opportunity to be the valiant defender. Maybe he was sweet on one of the girls and put on a great show of being the concerned male for them LOL. I got nominated by chance to be the .:rolleyes:

What the crazy mountain man psychopathic hiker looked like that year (http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=37&catid=member&imageuser=5)

Pokey your fears and worries are justified.

Don't camp near forest service roads, trail heads, etc. Plan your day so that this doesn't happen, especially on the weekends.

I've never had a problem on the Trail. Never. I've always had a problem in town, and camping too close to civilization. Mostly problems in town: don't make it obvious you're hiking alone, and don't go to pubs alone in strange towns.

StarLyte......ALWAYS???? As in every single time your in a town you encounter a problem? Sorry to hear that if that is the case. Really says something about our state of affairs now doesn't it....

When asked a personal question where I feel the need to be evasive, I always invite the Lord into the conversation.

"Where are you stopping?"
"Wherever the Lord tells me to stop".

About 90% of the people will immediately clam up. The vast majority of people will understand that you don't have a set place to stop.

StarLyte......ALWAYS???? As in every single time your in a town you encounter a problem? Sorry to hear that if that is the case. Really says something about our state of affairs now doesn't it....
******************
So sorry-I will have to correct that. I should have proofread before I posted-thanks for bringing this to my attention.

When asked a personal question where I feel the need to be evasive, I always invite the Lord into the conversation.

"Where are you stopping?"
"Wherever the Lord tells me to stop".

About 90% of the people will immediately clam up. The vast majority of people will understand that you don't have a set place to stop.yes its amazing how that is as a pretty new believer I find it odd how people love to talk BS but when I talk about the lord they just fringe.ky

yes its amazing how that is as a pretty new believer I find it odd how people love to talk BS but when I talk about the lord they just fringe.ky

That's actually a good idea. That would get me to move along. Most people, myself included, don't seem to want to be preached to when hiking. Nothing against anyone or their views, just not what I am out there for.

If that does not work, look up and start talking to the sky and say that you are carrying on a conversation. Although that might get you a name referencing the Irishman on Braveheart.

That's actually a good idea. That would get me to move along. Most people, myself included, don't seem to want to be preached to when hiking. Nothing against anyone or their views, just not what I am out there for.

Definitely true.

If that does not work, look up and start talking to the sky and say that you are carrying on a conversation. Although that might get you a name referencing the Irishman on Braveheart.

Or you could always put on an aluminum foil hat and start talking about the invasion...as you look at the sky. Of course, that wouldn't creep me out as much as someone preaching or talking to god....but it might work! :D

That's actually a good idea. That would get me to move along. Most people, myself included, don't seem to want to be preached to when hiking. Nothing against anyone or their views, just not what I am out there for.

If that does not work, look up and start talking to the sky and say that you are carrying on a conversation. Although that might get you a name referencing the Irishman on Braveheart.works everytime:eek: ky

It's not just a girl thang. Guy hikers will sometimes be evasive about where they are spending the night. Maybe for a different set of reasons, who knows?

But to think you're going to change the culture of the AT, and get male (or female) hikers to stop asking one of the most common questions out there, is not realistic.

You always have the option of being evasive, or outright lying. If you are truly concerned for your safety, that would be the way to go.

Well I thought that at the time about the girls but not the guy. I had seen him before.

The guy I had seen at Amicalola falls about a week earlier. He was about 20 years old from Florida and was there with his parents who were dropping him off up at the FS42 trail head. When I first saw him he was getting a ranger at the park to do a shake down for him on his gear. From the conversation he was a former boyscout about to do his first long distance section by himself (I think he was going to Fontanna) while I was just leaving my car there and getting a shuttle from Hacksaw up to NOC the next day as I had just driven 11 hours to get there.

I found out later about the women. A few days later I hit Neels Gap and stopped for ice cream, iodine, sodas, laundry, shower, etc. While I was hanging out there I talked with one of the guys working there. Said he had done a shake down on these two women from Florida that were hiking the AT for the first time and going from Springer to Hiawasii I think. They had stopped at NOC way overloaded and beat down. The guy there said between the two of them they mailed back about 60 pounds in gear before heading out again.

So basically Mr Boyscout met the Newbie Twins somewhere on the trail and they became a group. I imagine they got used to him and let him be their boyscout defender. I was probably his opportunity to be the valiant defender. Maybe he was sweet on one of the girls and put on a great show of being the concerned male for them LOL. I got nominated by chance to be the .:rolleyes:

What the crazy mountain man psychopathic hiker looked like that year (http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=37&catid=member&imageuser=5)

I wOULDNT HAVE GONE ANYWHERE NEAR YOU!!!!:eek: THAT'S IT, TIME TO CARRY A GUN!

Well, I may have asked women I encountered something like "How far are you getting today - I hope to reach XXX Shelter?" but I have never asked "are you alone?" or "is someone with you?" And for that matter, I haven't asked solo guys either nor has anyone ever asked me. So I don't understand how that question is "normal Trail conversation" - it never has been when I hiked.

Well, I may have asked women I encountered something like "How far are you getting today - I hope to reach XXX Shelter?" but I have never asked "are you alone?" or "is someone with you?" And for that matter, I haven't asked solo guys either nor has anyone ever asked me. So I don't understand how that question is "normal Trail conversation" - it never has been when I hiked.If you told me you were hoping to reach the triple X shelter I'd definitely be a little weirded out;) .

Other than that, I'd say I have had similar interactions as Cookerhiker.

I have never asked "are you alone?"

It is an odd question - especially on a social trail like the AT. I think its only natural that a question like that would set off some internal alarm.

A lot of threads out there on this one. If you are serious about this one, keep in mind it is illegal to have one for most of the trail. If anything else look into pepper spray. But then again, this is a pretty loaded topic.


On MOST of the trail you are allowed to have a handgun.

What the crazy mountain man psychopathic hiker looked like that year (http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=37&catid=member&imageuser=5)

Yep, you definitely looked suspicious. Nah. It's not as simple as that. If only it were that easy. Then, we wouldn't have to bother with trying to figure out if you're asking for good or evil. ;-)

My greatest concern about hiking next year is the security issue. But, I'm going anyway. And I just announced to everyone here that I'm going alone. Dumb. Or maybe not. Since it's supposed to be a tight community, I plan on looking out for others hiking a similar pace and I was hoping we will all look out for each other. So, if I don't show up at the shelter area one night, maybe others would start to ask "hey, has anyone seen Laura? I thought she was aiming for __ tonight?" At least, that's what I keep telling my family and friends who don't want me to go alone.

[QUOTE=Pokey2006]Ah, but Jack, why can't you guys be a little more sensitive to the fact that those are totally inappropriate questions to ask???
[....QUOTE]

I'm confused... Who decided they are inappropriate questions?? As other have said - You can simply be vague - It's more fun to control others once they have made the committment to open up to you - Leave them wondering "***??"

I do it all the time when asked and sometimes I'll even lie
(remember: It's not a lie if you beleive it)

Where you headed for the night?
- "Ahh I don't know yet - It's my husband's/wife's turn to decide"
(look over your shoulder like you are expecting him any moment).

- "Don't know and don't care..." "Why?? Where are you going?"
(You can always easily and quickly turn the conversation around since everyone usually loves to talk about themselves, and then after a minute say - "Well, gotta go, take care!!")

- "Why?!?!" "Does it really matter to you??"
(More hostile, but the point is usually made)

I presonally don't ask if anyone is alone, simply because I don't really care - I'm not out on the trail to take a hiking partner survey. But I might ask if you've met a lot of folks on the trail ahead of me, so I can gauge what the next shelter might be like.

Me thinks Mountain...... Molehill
Cheers,

I get asked the same questions,and Im a guy,I never had any problems.Most guys out there hiking are good guys and respectfull twords woman,I think youll be alright.

StarLyte......ALWAYS???? As in every single time your in a town you encounter a problem? Sorry to hear that if that is the case. Really says something about our state of affairs now doesn't it....
Nah, she's just too cute to be in public alone. Sassy, too. :eek:

Well, I may have asked women I encountered something like "How far are you getting today - I hope to reach XXX Shelter?" but I have never asked "are you alone?" or "is someone with you?" And for that matter, I haven't asked solo guys either nor has anyone ever asked me. So I don't understand how that question is "normal Trail conversation" - it never has been when I hiked.
People ask me all the time if I'm hiking alone. Usually in the vein of "Aren't you scared?" Then I usually start talking about God, faith and fear. Most people aren't as weird about it as the folks here are. :)

People ask me all the time if I'm hiking alone. Usually in the vein of "Aren't you scared?" Then I usually start talking about God, faith and fear. Most people aren't as weird about it as the folks here are. :)

Are you talking people you meet on the Trail while hiking asking you this or your off-the-trail life with friends, associates, etc. when you're talking about hiking? My non-hiking friends ask me frequently whether I hike alone but on the Trail itself, I never get that question.

Yeah I know Frank - you don't have an "off-the-trail" life.;)

Asking someone, male or female, how far you are going today is very common. Specifically asking if you are alone sets off the weird radar in me. YMMV.

You could always say "I am hiking until the mood strikes me, I haven't decided how far to go today"

And about hiking alone "I'm never alone" and leave it at that.

Velcro some 9mm ammo in a prominent location on your pack strap and they will likely "change the subject" :-)

I bet uma thurman or lucy lui wouldnt be too concerned over matters like these CHOP CHOP

You could always say "I am hiking until the mood strikes me, I haven't decided how far to go today"

That's my approach.

But then again, I hike mostly as 1/2 of a couple which seems to be more dangerous on the AT than going solo.

Deep down I know that the AT is safer than my home town (even if 1 in 100 homes/sheltes in my particular town have not been the site of a multiple murder), but I find the question from a stranger intrusive none the less. Whether on the AT or any trail.

Probably would be different if I were a thru hiker being asked by a fellow thru hiker.

Are you talking people you meet on the Trail while hiking asking you this or your off-the-trail life with friends, associates, etc. when you're talking about hiking? My non-hiking friends ask me frequently whether I hike alone but on the Trail itself, I never get that question.

Yeah I know Frank - you don't have an "off-the-trail" life.;)
People off the trail.

And yeah, I have an off-trail life. I just don't enjoy it as much. :)

seriously ridge, lay off the sauce before you start posting threads about allegedly hiking the pct and uploading pictures that someone else took of denali, and saying they were your shots of the sierras. i think we've all had enough for one night.

Wasn't that someone's "kid", Goat?:D

Well, I may have asked women I encountered something like "How far are you getting today - I hope to reach XXX Shelter?" but I have never asked "are you alone?" or "is someone with you?" And for that matter, I haven't asked solo guys either nor has anyone ever asked me. So I don't understand how that question is "normal Trail conversation" - it never has been when I hiked.



Wait!....There's a Triple X Shelter on the trail???:jump

In 2001 I was hiking the GA AT had a dream about that XXX shelter.

It had the Swedish Bikini Team as caretakers, a hot tub, and there was fried chicken with Tabasco sauce and cold beer at it.

I looked and looked for it for the rest of my hike. But I never found it. I think it must be like the hiker equivalent of El Dorado.

" Or you could always put on an aluminum foil hat and start talking about the invasion"

It's funny but never do that. I obtained a Clingon once doing that. He thought I was a kindred spirit. I can usually shake off the Pharisitical religious types but conspiracy types are much harder because they aren't even remotely interested in anything you have to say. And some of them can be risky. When in doubt, I always lean towards vague.

Side note: Coyotes are starting to become more active in the Pearisburg/Mountain Lake region. A couple in my neighborhood spotted some on a trail in Blacksburg.

In 2001 I was hiking the GA AT had a dream about that XXX shelter.

It had the Swedish Bikini Team as caretakers, a hot tub, and there was fried chicken with Tabasco sauce and cold beer at it.

I looked and looked for it for the rest of my hike. But I never found it. I think it must be like the hiker equivalent of El Dorado. Me either, but I've heard tales that the prophylactic machine and vibrating bunks are both free.

i can understand why you might be reserved about these questions but i think i would find myself asking you these because i wouldnt think of the ill-intentioned. i spend prob 88% of my time with female friends & i begin to forget about the differences in perspective because we hold so many of the same

Rock, You saw the Swedish Bikini Backpacking team, too? I thought I was the only one. Thanks for the collaboration, even if it was only a dream. Now, where is that XXX shelter?:rolleyes: I won't ask you girls stupid questions on the trail. Most of the girls, when they see me all worn out on the AT aren't worried a bit. Now, some of the girls I've seen probably scared me more than I did them!
In 2001 I was hiking the GA AT had a dream about that XXX shelter.

It had the Swedish Bikini Team as caretakers, a hot tub, and there was fried chicken with Tabasco sauce and cold beer at it.

I looked and looked for it for the rest of my hike. But I never found it. I think it must be like the hiker equivalent of El Dorado.

Well I thought that at the time about the girls but not the guy. I had seen him before.

The guy I had seen at Amicalola falls about a week earlier. He was about 20 years old from Florida and was there with his parents who were dropping him off up at the FS42 trail head. When I first saw him he was getting a ranger at the park to do a shake down for him on his gear. From the conversation he was a former boyscout about to do his first long distance section by himself (I think he was going to Fontanna) while I was just leaving my car there and getting a shuttle from Hacksaw up to NOC the next day as I had just driven 11 hours to get there.

I found out later about the women. A few days later I hit Neels Gap and stopped for ice cream, iodine, sodas, laundry, shower, etc. While I was hanging out there I talked with one of the guys working there. Said he had done a shake down on these two women from Florida that were hiking the AT for the first time and going from Springer to Hiawasii I think. They had stopped at NOC way overloaded and beat down. The guy there said between the two of them they mailed back about 60 pounds in gear before heading out again.

So basically Mr Boyscout met the Newbie Twins somewhere on the trail and they became a group. I imagine they got used to him and let him be their boyscout defender. I was probably his opportunity to be the valiant defender. Maybe he was sweet on one of the girls and put on a great show of being the concerned male for them LOL. I got nominated by chance to be the .:rolleyes:

What the crazy mountain man psychopathic hiker looked like that year (http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=37&catid=member&imageuser=5)

So, how is Hacksaw? I haven't seen his name in a coon's age.

Kinnickinic

I haven't seen him since 2001 but he occasionally posts here. He has had some health problems but I think he is overcoming them and is planning at least a long hike, if not a whole thru, in 2007.

Greyblazer, I think we will have to build our own XXX shelter if we want one. Maybe we could get the "Man Show" to sponsor it.

Let me check with my wife first.....OUCH....She said,"no".:rolleyes:
I haven't seen him since 2001 but he occasionally posts here. He has had some health problems but I think he is overcoming them and is planning at least a long hike, if not a whole thru, in 2007.

Greyblazer, I think we will have to build our own XXX shelter if we want one. Maybe we could get the "Man Show" to sponsor it.

Let me check with my wife first.....OUCH....She said,"no".:rolleyes:



His wife said no too.... ;)

:datz So did mine

Where you headed for the night?
- "Ahh I don't know yet - It's my husband's/wife's turn to decide"
(look over your shoulder like you are expecting him any moment).


This could be a geat answer if you stated it as "Ahh, I don't know yet--It's my husband's other wife's turn to decide." In the face of polygamy, most thru-hikers would drop the issue and hike on.:D

Where you headed for the night?
- "Ahh I don't know yet - It's my husband's/wife's turn to decide"
(look over your shoulder like you are expecting him any moment).


This could be a geat answer if you stated it as "Ahh, I don't know yet--It's my husband's other wife's turn to decide." In the face of polygamy, most thru-hikers would drop the issue and hike on.:D
Or sister-wife's decision. You have also provided a good 5-10 second confusion delay to make an escape!

His wife said no too.... ;)

:datz So did mine


Isn't it amazing these responses were posted at the same time... :D

Where you headed for the night?
- "Ahh I don't know yet - It's my husband's/wife's turn to decide"
(look over your shoulder like you are expecting him any moment).


This could be a geat answer if you stated it as "Ahh, I don't know yet--It's my husband's other wife's turn to decide." In the face of polygamy, most thru-hikers would drop the issue and hike on.:D


I dunno, man... there's at least a small percentage that you'd encourage with that sort of answer.

And no I'm not speaking from experience.... ;)

As with everything else out-there. Once your "dialed in" to your hike and your surroundings you GUT is going to be your best mentor. I thinks its the way some ask the questions that is telling as to their intent.

GUTS are essential out there, learn to be one with your GUT

True, but LOL anyway

GUTS are essential out there, learn to be one with your GUT

GUT?? Grand Unified Theory? :D

Sorry, couldn't resist....

Good Words Pokey. See You Later ,trouble.

Isn't it amazing these responses were posted at the same time... :D

Yeah but ya see who's made it in first? ;) :D

Isn't it amazing these responses were posted at the same time... :Dhttp://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/internet/08/08/cybercouples.reut/index.html

http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/internet/08/08/cybercouples.reut/index.html

I resubmit the statment I made to a friend who says Nintendo and all are giving us a generation of children with excellent reflexes and enhanced problem solving skills (I am not kidding here - he went on for about 20 minutes about how good video games are for kids)

We are raising a generation of kids who do not know how to talk to each other. What does it say about our social skills that we can not go on a date and talk to the person sitting across the table. No wonder we ask inappropriate questions of individuals on the trail!

but I digress - and I'm headed out for north Georgia - hope to see some of you out there!

I will have to change my habbits because I love seeing girls on the trail. They seems to bring something special to the trail. Keep hiking is all I can say to all the female hikers out there!!!!

Isn't it amazing these responses were posted at the same time... :D

LOL, we were both at different computers "administratin' ". We have our systems side by side so we can talk with each other as we do it. BUT when I am in Iraq we do use Yahoo IM a whole lot.

So why is it that 90 percent of hikers I encounter on the trail ask me two things: am I alone, and where am I headed for the night???....STOP ASKING THOSE QUESTIONS, PLEASE!Pokey

I`m sure this has been said already but I`m kind of tired now to read thru all the posts..BUT..I think this is just normal trail chit-chat and seems to be normal questions I recall hearing many a time when hiking (The fact that 90% of hikers ask this kind of proves that)..I think you should bear in mind the place it`s asked and by whom it`s asked..Maybe on the street in New York it might be a bad thing to be asked but on the AT I would take it differently. Likewise if it`s asked by another hiker I would take it differently than if asked by just some guy near a trailhead or parking area...Unfortunately this is a by product of equal rights and feminism..The male hikers see you as just another hiker and not as a female hiker and are simply trying to treat you as such

I was stalked on the trail and was hiking with a partner who was more than capable of taking care of both of us if necessary. It seems to me that men need to let women alone who are not interested in giving their destinations or interested in being scared by a man on the trail. The man who stalked me just wouldn't give up and had to be told by others and the police to let me alone. Alcohol had a great deal to do with that last attempt on his part. But even though I feel I can take care of myself if I need to, it did scare me. Dealing with a man who is intoxicated is a totally different situation.He wanted me to get in the car with him at the hostel while he was drunk and wouldn't take no for an answer. So men need to be aware of how certain things they say and do have an affect on women.

Mabye this is a bit counter-intuitive, but anyone with nefarious plans might try not to ask such questions so as not to spook an intended victim. Some social bumbler who is obviously just trying to make small talk who asks them is mabye showing a complete lack of ill intent.

AIDS may make a good defense if you don't want to be bothered. Just say:
I have AIDS! and don't know how far I'll get today or where I'll stay.
This could work for the guys who want to ditch that pain in the a.. girl that's been bugging him too.

Mabye this is a bit counter-intuitive, but anyone with nefarious plans might try not to ask such questions so as not to spook an intended victim. Some social bumbler who is obviously just trying to make small talk who asks them is mabye showing a complete lack of ill intent.

IOW don't trust the smooth-talkers? ;)

I don't understand all this PC. If it is a thru hiker that is asking and you know them or want them to know-tell them.
If you don't know them or don't want them to know your destination simply tell them that you don't know them and you don't think it it is any of their business.
geek

It is not inappropriate to ask someone how far they're going or where they plan to camp, whether they're male or female, alone or in a group. If you're uncomfortable with that question, you should give a false answer. I can think of situations or particular manners of asking this question that might make me uncomfortable as well, but if it always makes you uncomfortable, maybe it has more to do with you than with others.

I can think of several reasons someone might ask you, because you're female, if you're hiking alone, and although most of them are fairly innocent, none of them are completely appropriate, and you're right, people shouldn't ask you that in the first place.

I'm generally of the opinion that its a bad idea for a male or female to readily admit they are alone under any circumstances, even on the relatively safe AT. Odds are its a perfectly innocent question from someone with no ill intent at all, but why gamble when a better and more likely truthful on the AT answer is that there is some sort of loose group around you that you know and leapfrog with frequently. All sorts of variations on that theme are possible depending on how much information you want to offer and what impression you want to give.

How far are you going or where are you heading, as many others said, is really perfectly normal conversation between travelers in general, not just hikers. Think about killing a couple hours waiting for a transfer at an airport terminal bar or train station, the topic will almost certainly come up if you are a social person and interact with those around you at all.

"Are you staying in Lexington or heading on from there".
"Going to be working in El Paso? Planning on heading down to Juarez if you can break free?"
"I'm heading on to DC, are you staying in Atlanta?"

Those questions in the context of an airport or as a passenger on a plane probabily wouldn't strike you as odd at all, its just people making conversation and using a bit of common ground (that you are both traveling) to do so.

Trust your instincts about people, reserve the right to be evasive (being non-committal is great for politely being evasive), Its not just a male / female thing. I'd bet almost everyone who's been on the AT has wanted to have a night to themselves or a change of company at some point and answered "I'm just going to hike until I get tired or find a cool place to stop tonight, maybe XYZ shelter but I dont know, depends on what happens and how I feel, maybe I'll push further." It tended to be pretty true with alot of us anyway.

Ok, so I will admit I have not taken the time to read every single comment on this thread but, I do get the jest of what most floks are saying. Having said that, here are my 2 cents worth.

There is a pretty common term in the long distance hiking community. This term refers to getting your trail legs. Getting your trail legs refers to your personal ability for your legs to get comfotable with your additional weight, stride, pace, balance, gait...so one and so forth. Once you get your trail legs, you develop a natural ability to move effortlessly around obstacles you encouter. You are about to bound from rock to rock and seem to glide down the trail easier then climbing a flight of stairs in urban America.

Now keep in mind that you will not only develop trail legs, but you will also develop your trail gut and trail mind. This development grows over a period of time. In the case of encoutering people along the trail, you will develop the savy that allows you to naturally handle these situations. Some people are naturals, other require a little more developement. You will learn to trust your gut when placed in situations you are uncomfortable with and respond accordingly. Safety for a solo female hiker is a real issue. You can not bury your head in the sand, nor can you choose to over react. Either of these has a real potential to destroy your hike and force you to loose sight of the reason you are on the trail to begin with.

I would venture to say that anyone who desired to do any ill thought of acts would be in a position to be able to accomplish there mission reguardless of how you respond. This is where is is critical to develop your trail gut. Anyone with this intend would be able to observe from a distance whether a female was alone or not just by keeping a distance. Furthermore, it does not take rocket science to figure out a pace and which shelters are down the trail. My point is that if someone intended ill harm, chances are they would be rather bold to ask "Are you alone?" or "When are you spending the night?" I say this not to freak you out, but let you know that manytimes questions like this are simply an attempt to make conversation with a new found friend.

When I venture out anywhere in the world, I have to make an immediate assement of my environment and constantly re-assess the situation. Not out of paranoia, but good street smarts--or should I say "Trail Smarts".

My wife tells me I could strike up a conversation with a deaf mute. I typically strike up a conversation with questions I know I can get typical answers from asking. When I ask questions, I never intend to make people uncomfortable. Sometimes I miss my mark. I have absolutely no idea what may trigger a particualr thought process because I am not privledged to my new found friend's history, background, or personal experiences. This is what my gut is for. I have a pretty good sense of character and can tell when someone is being evasive or flat out lying. We all give off these signals.

Now, I would say that as you are strolling down the trail, you will meet many new friends along the way. Even if you are hiking your own hike, you have many friends. You are not hiking alone--you simply are hiking at your own pace and well, in fact, link up with your friends later down the trail. This is neither lying or misleading--it is a simple fact. Now here is another thought. I have started out on many occasions with a specific goal in mind for the day. I can not count the number of times I either overshot or shortfalled my original goal. So when you ask me where I will end up for the evening, I would typically respond "where ever I end up at the end of my travel day". When I respond like this, I am not being evasive or lying. I simply have not clue on where I will end up.

Now for the issue of appropiateness of questions. I would seriously never set out to make anyone uncomfortable upon my first meeting--I normally wait until I get to know them for a day or two--haha. I would be a little insulted if anyone presented me a list of things I should or should not say to someone on the trail. Sure, I may say or do a few things that someone may get uncomfortable with--this does not mean I am insensitive or flat out rude and crude. The wonderful thing about traveling in the outdoors, is that you will meet ALL kinds of people out there. Some folks will make an immediate connection. Some folks will flat out piss you off. Others with give you reason to watch your six. The cool thing about this wonderful experience is the melting pot of personalities you will encouter. As I stated about, this is where your trail gut and your trail mind will take over. I would say to you that if you encountered me and I happened to ask "Hey, what are you doing out here by yourself?' would be done with no ill intent--if you choose to process that in a way that I was a wierdo or a freak, I would have no control over your thought process. I certainly am not going to spend the time or enrgy on analysing every word I say. I would be an absolute miserable lot I I do. Many of my conversation is natural and flows with the moment--even with people I meet for the first time.

Now, I'm certain folks will draw some conclusions with my comments. Rest assured I am not an inconsiderate or insensitive dude. If I was I would probably do some crazy ***** like walk up behind a solo female hiker and yell "BOO".

Be aware of your surroundings and take time enjoy the reason you are on the trail.

Pokey...

Do you even enjoy hiking at all?? Why do you hike the AT if you are continuously sexually harrassed and/or afraid of male hikers. I have some of the same concerns that you have but it seems to me that you are whining and crying to the wrong group of guys. The creeps and weirdos are not reading this forum and I can tell you that the rapists won't read it and go..."huh, I should change my ways...".

All your threads do is make men uncomfortable around women on the trail. Men should not have to feel guilty or on gaurd because other men may be jerks. I love men!! Some are jerks, some are psycho, some are mean but most are just trying to live their lives the best they can. So ease up! If you can't handle it, start some kind of man-hating commune or something...

My advice to women with similiar fears, yes I think Pokey is afraid, take self-defense courses, buy a big knife, get some self-confidence.

Pokey, I think you are a troll that just likes to start a stink and I'm done reading the results of you whining and sniveling.

Amazonwoman

HEAR! HEAR! Kudos to AW,
geek

Thanks geek,

hey, you posting alone? where you headed to tonight;)

Amazonwoman

The Closest Pub!!!!!
Geek

that is only if you MUST know.
geek

Pokey...

Do you even enjoy hiking at all?? Why do you hike the AT if you are continuously sexually harrassed and/or afraid of male hikers. I have some of the same concerns that you have but it seems to me that you are whining and crying to the wrong group of guys.

Yeah, she seems a little over the top. It's not like when you hike the AT your hiking in isolation, it's a crowded, busy trail and you generally know, or know of, the others out there hiking, especially if they're shakey. Most of the time when someone asks, where you're hiking, or if you're hiking alone, it's an innocent question. If someone doesn't seem right, just give them false info.

Hey Sly, I am still waiting for Pokey to answer your question :eek:

Geez, I thought this was going to be a great thread. :confused:

"Questions NOT to ask other hikers"

my god, when are you going to bathe?

Didn't you say you came on the trail to be LESS of an *******?

How much does you pack weigh?

Why do you have an external backpack?

What did I do to make you think I wanted you to come up and talk to me?

I'm sure many more great ones would have been posted. Oh well.

i don't tip toe around what others might not want me to ask.. I go freeflow into conversations.. and chances are, if your like pokey, my vibe will be to stay away.. Paranoia in the woods is a real buzz kill. I can tell when people don't want to converse, and chances are pokey, that if all of these things are going through your head everytime you meet a dude hiker and your alone, your sending some wicked paranoid vibes, and you won't have to worry about company anyway

Will you hold my gun while I hit on your wife?
Doesn't everybody keep their hand sanitizer and tooth brush in the same zip lock?
Are those boobs real or fake?
Can I borrow your Swiss Army Knife? I need to trim my nose hairs.
Is that a pair of Smartwools in your pocket, or are you happy to see me?
Did you know that if you cut all the switchbacks, the trail is only 1900 miles long?
Will you hold my dog's leash for a moment? Don't worry. He's only bitten two other hikers.
Is that your sister you were kissing last night?
Do you use the shiny leaves that grow in groups of three on the hairy vines for toilet paper too?


And the number one question not to ask....

10. Are you Minnisota Smith?

Did you know that if you cut all the switchbacks, the trail is only 1900 miles long?



There are switchbacks on the AT ??!?!? :)

There are switchbacks on the AT ??!?!? :)

THat's #11. :welcome back Mags.

Well just cuz the thread is focused on one issue doesn't mean the poster is. Guys can always use a few more pointers on how to interact with women that actually come from women. It's true though, only the already well-intentioned will benefit from such advice...still worthwhile, though.

Hey Sly, I am still waiting for Pokey to answer your question :eek:

I know, me too. I've been curious about that! ;)

Questions not to ask on a hiking website: Questions not to ask hikers?

Guys can always use a few more pointers on how to interact with women that actually come from women.

I think certain women need advice on how to interact with guys. For the most part, I find men much easier to get along with (and understand) than women.

An observation for Pokey: In every negative social interaction you have, the common thread is you. Think about it.

Possible AT Drama show titles (That's what all this is, alot of drama)

1) "As the Trail Steepens"
2) "The Sore and the Blistered"
3) "Sgt. Rock's Anatomy" :D
4) "Damascus!"
5) "Desperate Thru-hikers"

Amazonwoman

AMEN VICTORIA M.!!!!!

amazonwoman

myself, I get asked all the time...where are you from where are you headed. I ask the same of other hikers. I really see no reason this should be a problem. It doesnt bother me at all if someone asks me where I am headed...I usually say probably next shelter or something like that.

As for myself.. I ask such questions of other hikers, male or female converationally. A vague or cold response and I will let the person take off. Happened to me in Maine.. and I was happy to never see the lady again. Besides..I hike at my own pace irrespective of any other hikers plans.

David

I think it's a question that, like a lot of other questions that are personal or semi-personal, depends on who is asking. If I've gotten to know someone on the trail, over a period of several days (or more) and we're comfortable talking with each other, I don't see that there is a problem. By then, my friend will have a pretty good idea that it's harmless (with me) or maybe less so, with someone else, but not out of line if we're friends. It might come in a number of contexts, all innocent, and that would be by then understood.

If it wasn't, it shouldn't be asked, and that's where I think some women (and frankly, some guys) feel uncomfortable: If you haven't known someone very well, then you should ask such things.

The Weasel

Possible AT Drama show titles (That's what all this is, alot of drama)

1) "As the Trail Steepens"
2) "The Sore and the Blistered"
3) "Sgt. Rock's Anatomy" :D
4) "Damascus!"
5) "Desperate Thru-hikers"

Amazonwoman

I guess "Lost" was too easy!

I have never asked such questions of any females on the trail. No need to, I figure if I had an inkling of a chance they would ask me those questions ;-) So feel safe around me ladies !
HAIRNT !

RAT

I know you're not "supposed" to tell other people where you're camping... but it does seem to be a common question. And usually it just means, "how fast are you? am I going to see you again, possibly tonight at the shelter?" just because we're nosy thru-hikers and we like to know how many will be at the shelter, who's on the trail, etc... And sometimes I found myself asking the question too, knowing it was a "bad" question to ask. Usually I asked it of people I'd already talked to a bit, not a total stranger. But it's unlikely we'll stop hearing it... You can always say, "Oh, I'm not sure how far we'll make it, maybe the next shelter, maybe farther." Or, you can say, "what kind of question is that? can't you see I'm a woman hiking alone? Have some respect!"

I guess "Lost" was too easy!

What would you call the show were hikers get conjugal visits when they get to civilization?!

Rain:sunMan

.

I know, me too. I've been curious about that! ;)


I think by not answering the question she answered the question :p

An observation for Pokey: In every negative social interaction you have, the common thread is you. Think about it.


glad someone else noticed that:D

I think by not answering the question she answered the question :p

As the curious type, I'm interested in the details! :D

Sly and Ewker, it's time to let that drop. Thank you.

Every time I've seen a lady alone on the trail it's pretty much a safe assumption that they are actually alone - most people know this. Most of the time I've seen the before mentioned ladies they offer up the information under question in this thread without me asking if we get into a conversation longer than "hello."

Tell the person or someone else if you're asked a question you don't like.