zero base wt.

[squeezebox]

Man I've got this figured out.
Everything I carry is consumable. My sleeping pad will eventually spring a leak and I'll toss it. Same with my sleeping bag, it will get torn etc, and I'll toss it. My pack will get messed up somehow and get replaced, so it doesn't count either. My stove might break so it goes too. The clothes in the pack will get nasty enough to throw away, they don't count. Same with the tent. Everything in my pack is consumable. I will eventually die so even my skin in wt. can't be counted.

I am the ultimate nano light hiker!!
I am hiker God!!
Bow before me!!!

[Kookork]

I was thinking to hike on the surface of the moon( the famous crater to crater trail) so my pack weight was instantly 1/6 of the weight on earth but you beat me Hiker God.

[scatman]

With a frig in the garage full of beer, cold pizza, and Costo supply of Pop Tarts I plan to hike laps naked around my neighborhood. I'll use the pooh shed at the construction site so that's covered.

[squeezebox]

I was thinking to hike on the surface of the moon( the famous crater to crater trail) so my pack weight was instantly 1/6 of the weight on earth but you beat me Hiker God.

Geez!! but finding water.

[squeezebox]

With a frig in the garage full of beer, cold pizza, and Costo supply of Pop Tarts I plan to hike laps naked around my neighborhood. I'll use the pooh shed at the construction site so that's covered.

Have you considered professional counseling?
You just ain't right.

[squeezebox]

Does anybody have a data base of hiker names? Like how many redbeards are there? Is there anybody skeeter? or gatta pee? etc, etc,
Because I have a grand announcement to follow soon, and would appreciate a little knowledge, before I'm blowing hot air out of my butt.
Yea like that's never happened before.

[squeezebox]

Man I've got this figured out.
Everything I carry is consumable. My sleeping pad will eventually spring a leak and I'll toss it. Same with my sleeping bag, it will get torn etc, and I'll toss it. My pack will get messed up somehow and get replaced, so it doesn't count either. My stove might break so it goes too. The clothes in the pack will get nasty enough to throw away, they don't count. Same with the tent. Everything in my pack is consumable. I will eventually die so even my skin in wt. can't be counted.

I am the ultimate nano light hiker!!
I am hiker God!!
Bow before me!!!

Okay Grand announcement!
Prince kinda upstaged me on this by changing to the artist formally known as Prince thing, and I won't mention Bruce Jenner. So here goes!! drum roll please!!
Since I have just recently achieved hiked en-lightenment by being the 1st person to achieve absolute zero pack wt. (see notes above). I will no longer be known as squeezebox the accordion player. (haven't played the thing for a while anyway)
!! I am hiker God!!! okay I'll change to a lower case g
!! I am hiker god !! god will be acceptable.
You may kiss my ring. And if you see me dropping my pants heading off to the privy or a cathole you may kiss my ass.
!! I am hiker god !!
I have spoken !!! okay so it's typed, big deal.

(Boy if there is already a hiker god out there I'm gonna feel real stupid going back to Squeezebox)

[Dogwood]

I am the ultimate nano light hiker!

Uber mega nano hydrogen light!.....................also referred to simply as Naked Survival.

[squeezebox]

I am the ultimate nano light hiker!

Uber mega nano hydrogen light!.....................also referred to simply as Naked Survival.

You can be nano light but I'm still Hiker god. Do whatever you want to naked but please do survive.
!!! I have typed !!!

[Dogwood]

You're no Hiker God!!! You've just been daydreaming too much about edible panties from Adam&Eve as a Christmas gift

[Casey & Gina]

Dear hiker god, please here my woes and deliver to me an answer...

Today I tried sewing my own pack out of biodegradeable corn plastic produce bags from the market. Weight is virtually othing and I figure since it's made from corn I could count it as food anyways. Sadly, I could find no thread, tape, or other means of attachment that didn't weigh much more than the material or that I could consider to be food. Have you ever tried to find corn-based tape?

On the bright side, I do have some corn-based packing peanuts lying around that I can use as insulation in my DIY sleeping bag, clothing, hat, cape, overcoat, snowsuit, sleeping pad, pillow, bean bag, boa, stuffed animal collection, easy chair, couch... Gosh it is amazing how much luxury I can now take along thanks to the magic of corn plastic.

[squeezebox]

Hemp thread is the answer. You must strive to not smoke your pack though.
Keep searching Grasshopper!
Yes! you also may soon reach hiker en-lightenment.

[squeezebox]

You're no Hiker God!!! You've just been daydreaming too much about edible panties from Adam&Eve as a Christmas gift

No, those thongs just aren't very filling.

[Coffee]

When the sun turns into a Red Giant, the Earth will be consumed in flames and all base weights will approach zero.

[Connie]

Nano Hiker.

I like it.

[squeezebox]

Nano Hiker.

I like it.

Take it it's yours.
May the light-ness be with you.

[Odd Man Out]

I'm at least 20 lbs overweight. All I need to do is loose 20 lbs then my base weight drops to -5 lbs. Beat that!

[v1k1ng1001]

I have mylar balloons and a tank of helium in the back of my car. I just add balloons until my pack is weightless.

[Five Tango]

Not sure if you are a hikng god or not but you sound like a fine candidate for being a creative accountant!

[Heliotrope]

Start with the unnecessary and work inward.

Jewelry
Piercings
Tattoos
Those 5 lbs of dread locks
All body hair
Finger nails and toe nails
Ear wax
Belly button lint
All body fat
Tonsils
Adenoids
Appendix
Donate a kidney
Wisdom teeth
Splice out two feet of intestine



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