Yes and I think you got that backwards. LWolf would never say twit. That would be Jack.
SGT Rock
http://hikinghq.net
My 2008 Trail Journal of the BMT/AT
BMT Thru-Hikers' Guide
-----------------------------------------
NO SNIVELING
One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very
sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you
want." So he tied her up and went hiking.
That's a re-hash of an old Sherlock Holmes and Mr Watson joke, (but without the tension of LW and JackOriginally Posted by Pacific Tortuga
L. Wolf and Baltimore Jack went on a camping trip. Some hours later, L. Wolf awoke and nudged B. Jack his faithful friend. " Jack.......look up at the sky and tell me what you see." B. Jack replied: " I see a million stars." "What does that tell you ?"L. Wolf questioned ? Baltimore Jack pondered
for a minute ...... then replied , " Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentionally billions of planets. Astrologically I observe Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meterologically, I suspect that tomorrow will be a
beautiful day." "What does it tell you Wolf ?" Jack asked. Wolf was silent for a moment .... and then spoke, " Jack you jackass .....someone has stolen our tarp."
)
Ghandi was a hiker....
Ghandi walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard. Even when he wasn't on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. He also was quite a spiritual person. Furthermore, due to his diet, he ended up with very bad breath.
He became known as a super-callused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis.
That is cool, frieden! Gotta be in your thirties at least to get it. Was that a Disney movie?
You are in heaven.
Yep. 'Mary Poppins'
Skids
Insanity: Asking about inseams over and over again and expecting different results.
Albert Einstein, (attributed)
You're in your 30's and didn't know this was Mary Poppins?
Can you at least name the Simpsons character taken from Mary Poppins?
Wow, I wondered how long it would take people to get the Mary Poppins reference. Good job! Yep, we're old.
Mary Poppins no problem, but who are the Simpsons?
24 and got the joke right away. I guess I'm old too. HaHa.
I remember humorous backpacking story that I read online a few years ago. Not sure of the author, but I think I read it on the old hobocentral.com site. It used the evening ritual of stove/meal preparation to describe a steamy shelter fantasy. Not exactly R rated, but right on the edge. Very funny stuff. Anyone have a clue about this?
That's my dog, Echo. He's a fine young dog.
A hunter is crying over his dead friend. Another hunter happens along and asks, "what happened?" The first hunter says, "I mistook my friend for a deer and shot him by mistake". The second hunter looks over the dead hunter and says, "that was a flesh wound! He would have lived if you hadn't gutted him!"
Faith and begorah!
A NOBO Scottish thruhiker decides to take a nap on the AT one afternoon. So he drops his pack, lays back against a tree next to the trail and falls into a deep, deep sleep. A short while later two SOBO female thruhikers come along. They stop and after noticing the hiking kilt the man is wearing the following conversation ensues:
"I wonder if it's true."
"You wonder if what's true?"
"That they really don't wear anything under their kilts."
"Well why don't you look."
"Okay"
So the first woman bends over, gently lifts the kilt and reveals that the man really is wearing nothing under his kilt. She puts the kilt back down and they both stand there giggling softly. Then, snickering, the first woman says,
"I have a great idea."
"What's that?"
"Why don't I take this blue ribbon out of my hair and tie it around his, uh, thing?"
"Go for it, girl!"
So she takes the blue ribbon out of her hair, lifts the kilt and ties a lovely bow. Then she puts the kilt back in place and they go off down the trail laughing their asses off.
A while later the Scottish thruhiker awakens and immediately realizes that everything is not as it should be. He lifts his kilt, spies the blue ribbon and says,
"Aye, laddie, I don't know where ya been, but I'm a glad ya took first prize."
"When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute.
But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute--and it's longer than any hour.
That's relativity." --Albert Einstein--
Baltimore Jack hiking ultra-light. That would be a sight to see.
Wolf
There is a fine hiking song about that story that also won first prize...I wonder if Jester would post the lyrics?
Amigi, did you get my PM? Was that joke too disgusting to post?
If you have to ask...
Here are the lyrics to the song version: http://www.thebards.net/music/lyrics/The_Scotsman.shtml
Alright, for those of you who don't have me on your ignore list and for those of you about to add me to your ignore list, here goes.....These two hikers were sitting in a shelter after a long day of hiking. They were watching the one hiker's dog.......I can't do it!
Gray Blazer, you are a tease
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