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BougalouBlain
02-13-2014, 19:01
My friend with whom I was going to hike the AT with overdosed on heroin last night and is now in the i.c.u. I don't think he'll be coming now but that leaves me without a partner. Should I still go? Can I still go being that I have no hiking exp. I do have the money to go but I was gonna quit my job but now I don't know if it's worth it


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kayak karl
02-13-2014, 19:30
many start alone, but whether its worth it......only u can answer that.

hayshaker170
02-13-2014, 19:31
I am sorry to hear about your friend. Hopefully he can fully recover and get clean.

Malto
02-13-2014, 19:36
Either you have the burn in your heart for it or you don't. If you don't then it will likely be a quick trip. Who was more passionate about the thru hike, you or him?

map man
02-13-2014, 19:57
I would avoid making any decisions while this emotional event is so fresh in your mind.

Southeast
02-13-2014, 20:18
Give it some time and decide later

rickb
02-13-2014, 20:20
Go. Love your friend but find new ones*

*Obviously a generic comment from someone who does not know you. But if you were one of mine, that's what I'd say.

Damn Yankee
02-13-2014, 20:26
I agree. You may want to stay for a bit until your friend gets out of the ICU. That way you might be able to help him get into detox. That way your friend is safe and you will have a clear head. That said, sorry about your friend. I have lost many a friend to drugs and booze I just happened to be one of the lucky ones that survived my time. I feel that you should still go by yourself as you won't be by yourself for long and the experience will come on the trail and by the people you meet. It would be ashame to miss the experience.

dudeijuststarted
02-13-2014, 20:43
My friend with whom I was going to hike the AT with overdosed on heroin last night and is now in the i.c.u. I don't think he'll be coming now but that leaves me without a partner. Should I still go? Can I still go being that I have no hiking exp. I do have the money to go but I was gonna quit my job but now I don't know if it's worth it


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Those mountains will be there for a long time, my friend. You could always dedicate this year to short day or weekend hikes. If you decide not to go this go-round, don't beat yourself up.

Slo-go'en
02-13-2014, 20:50
Sorry about your friend, herion is apparently becoming one serious problem. He's lucky to still be alive. That said, hiking the AT with someone addicted to herion probably wasn't going to work out, so it's better this happend now and not while you were both on the trail. You might want to read "Wild", written by Cheryl Strayed, a woman who flirted with herion addiction but was able to turn her life around by hiking the PCT. Then give the book to your friend when he recovers.

bigcranky
02-13-2014, 20:57
Wow, hope your friend is okay.

As noted above, this may not be a great time to make final plans. Just know that it's possible for someone with no hiking experience to have a successful hike, however you want to define that. If you think you want to try that, come back and we'll offer some specific ideas that will help.

Peace.

rocketsocks
02-13-2014, 21:02
many start alone, but whether its worth it......only u can answer that.


I would avoid making any decisions while this emotional event is so fresh in your mind.I agree with both these fellas...
It seems to me, many start alone, but rarely finish alone...metaphorically speaking, and making friends all along the way, for life even. Might do you some good to meet some new people and gain some new perspective on things...

...on the other hand, normally this would be my concern for you as well, making big decisions while going though something like this, however, if you have the funds and it's not a big deal to bail out if it's not working for ya....then go for it. Again it just may do you some good to get away...it really is a decisions you'll have to figure out alone. Sorry to hear about your friend, that sucks...been there.

BougalouBlain
02-13-2014, 21:03
Him overdosing doesn't shock me at all cause it's not the first time either. His mother is an enabler. I know how it is cause I used to be right there gettin high with him but when is he gonna wake up? I finally did less than a year ago. I just feel really let down cause he kinda promised me he was clean and ready to go. He asked to borrow 15$ a week ago so I already figured this was going to happen but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. But I think it's an experience of a lifetime and I don't want to let his addiction stop me from going


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Hot Flash
02-13-2014, 21:07
My friend with whom I was going to hike the AT with overdosed on heroin last night and is now in the i.c.u. I don't think he'll be coming now but that leaves me without a partner. Should I still go? Can I still go being that I have no hiking exp. I do have the money to go but I was gonna quit my job but now I don't know if it's worth it


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Don't let the stupidity of someone else ruin your hike. Go and do it.

rocketsocks
02-13-2014, 21:21
Him overdosing doesn't shock me at all cause it's not the first time either. His mother is an enabler. I know how it is cause I used to be right there gettin high with him but when is he gonna wake up? I finally did less than a year ago. I just feel really let down cause he kinda promised me he was clean and ready to go. He asked to borrow 15$ a week ago so I already figured this was going to happen but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. But I think it's an experience of a lifetime and I don't want to let his addiction stop me from going



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...and nor should you. Kinda goin through somethin similar, in that, someone close to me recently hit bottom, stole to support a habit, got caught, and is now lookin at 3-5 in the big house...drugs sucks, and heroin ain't partyin', it's a death sentence most of the time. Your buddy needs to learn as you have. I wish him well, but he needs to learn that on his own, or it won't sink in and stick...truth!

fiddlehead
02-13-2014, 21:27
If you are worried about being alone and don't feel comfortable with that, then be assured you will meet people on the trail who will end up being great hiking partners, friends for life and similar hiking styles (and you don't know if your friend had the latter)

If you really are in doubt about wanting to do the hike, and not sure if you like to walk enough to do it day in and day out for 150 days, then you probably should not go.

Up to your desire. (as my wife would say)

BougalouBlain
02-13-2014, 21:27
Thanks... I wish your friend luck. Having done exactly to the tee what you described only I only got few months in county and some probation. Honestly though I'm glad I went through it because it was the start of putting my life back together. I could write a #1 best seller book with what I've seen and been through


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Spirit Walker
02-13-2014, 21:38
A great many of the people who start the AT have very little or no backpacking experience. You won't be the only newbie out there. Nor will you be alone. The shelters and hostels will be crowded. You'll meet many people and some will become good friends. If you truly want to thruhike the AT, the lack of a partner shouldn't stop you.

Waiting until your friend is out of the hospital is a good idea on several fronts. Now is not a good time to start the trail. There is a lot of snow out there. The later you start, the better the conditions. Early to mid-April has much better weather than mid-February. Waiting a bit also would mean you can leave without as much worry about what you are leaving behind. Your friend needs to make his own journey when and if he is ever ready.

rocketsocks
02-13-2014, 21:38
Thanks... I wish your friend luck. Having done exactly to the tee what you described only I only got few months in county and some probation. Honestly though I'm glad I went through it because it was the start of putting my life back together. I could write a #1 best seller book with what I've seen and been through


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many have written books, go for it. Glad to hear you put it down...good luck with your hike should you decide to go.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LD8tb_wx18w

Sierra2015
02-13-2014, 23:31
Do you go to meetings? Alanon will help you mentally and emotionally deal with your friend. Or another anonymous group for yourself.

I hope you go. Lots of time to think and gain perspective might be good for you.

As for your friend... he can't be a true friend while stuck in the narcissism of disease. Your friend means well and he cares for you... but right now he cares for the drug more. Can't treat him like a friend... love him like a brother possessed.

CELTIC BUCK
02-13-2014, 23:50
There is a life out in the woods, its yours to find and live . Tough as it may sound you need to Walk Away and save yourself. Head up the Trail and go find your own true oneness. He's waiting over the next couple mountains. Be the Man that takes care of others by first taking care of Himself.

Honuben
02-13-2014, 23:53
I guess i have a different view from others. I've had friends die from drugs (meth and herion) and from suicide. Reading what you posted as a past user, you need to get away from all of that. Silly as it sounds, the trail could be a "soul search" for you. I would recommend it. Start it, go through the challenge mentally and physically, leave your past behind and see when you get back see how your past life was. I have my family, i have my friends, but i also have my friends who are family. I would hike it, but do what you gotta do...

Sierra2015
02-14-2014, 00:04
I guess i have a different view from others. I've had friends die from drugs (meth and herion) and from suicide. Reading what you posted as a past user, you need to get away from all of that. Silly as it sounds, the trail could be a "soul search" for you. I would recommend it. Start it, go through the challenge mentally and physically, leave your past behind and see when you get back see how your past life was. I have my family, i have my friends, but i also have my friends who are family. I would hike it, but do what you gotta do...
I think a lot of us agree with this.

Slo-go'en
02-14-2014, 01:44
Definately read Wild by Cheryl Strayed, you'll relate to it big time.

Happy44
02-14-2014, 03:09
im leaving on march 1st and ill be your hiking buddy if you want, im going alone! so that would be nice if we paired up even if it was just for a week or 2

kennyxedge
02-14-2014, 05:50
I guess i have a different view from others. I've had friends die from drugs (meth and herion) and from suicide. Reading what you posted as a past user, you need to get away from all of that. Silly as it sounds, the trail could be a "soul search" for you. I would recommend it. Start it, go through the challenge mentally and physically, leave your past behind and see when you get back see how your past life was. I have my family, i have my friends, but i also have my friends who are family. I would hike it, but do what you gotta do...

Pretty well said.

Matthew82
02-14-2014, 10:05
Go ahead and do your hike. How would he have actually gone anyways if he was actively using? Did he think he could score some smack at the shelters? Sorry about your pal, but you can't do anything for him. It's going to have to run it's course and there's nothing you are going to do to change that.

Don't do anonymous groups. Do do any groups. Your not his girlfriend or dad, and those groups were created by people who really have no clue what their talking about. If you really think you need some help, find a professional. I'm sure you're fine though.

Enjoy yourself and don't let the fact that he's not slow you down.

q-tip
02-14-2014, 10:34
I have been in recovery for almost 30 years; your friend is about to embark on a journey that ultimately becomes a solitary spritual journey. You, on the other hand, could start your own spiritual journey on the AT. Although there are many friends and companions to meet, it is ultimately a singular and many times a solitary journey. This was my experience walking fom GA to WVA Aug. to Nov. 2010. I hiked with folks all day only seven times in the three months. Starting soon, that will not be the case. As others have said, if this is the quest you seek, then by all means go. However, if you do not want this for yourself, probably not a good idea to start. Be still, the answer will come.......

For your friend, I hope this is the Meaningful Consequence that saves his life....

Sierra2015
02-14-2014, 10:54
Go ahead and do your hike. How would he have actually gone anyways if he was actively using? Did he think he could score some smack at the shelters? Sorry about your pal, but you can't do anything for him. It's going to have to run it's course and there's nothing you are going to do to change that.

Don't do anonymous groups. Do do any groups. Your not his girlfriend or dad, and those groups were created by people who really have no clue what their talking about. If you really think you need some help, find a professional. I'm sure you're fine though.

Enjoy yourself and don't let the fact that he's not slow you down.
That's a good point... if he was resorting to borrowing money then how was he going to fund the trip?

Professionals are better but Alanon is free and is a great place to find support and gain basic skills.

Deadeye
02-14-2014, 15:17
Don't let the stupidity of someone else ruin your hike. Go and do it.

That sounds harsh, but if you let your friends' bad choices direct your life, nobody's going to be better off.

CarlZ993
02-14-2014, 18:23
I've seen a lot of people's lives ruined by drugs. I hope your friend recovers & you stay straight. Hiking the AT is irrelevant when compared to those issues.

If I was trying to stay straight & I had a friend who was still using, I'd tell him to look me up when he was clean. I wouldn't want to fall back in that vortex.

BougalouBlain
02-14-2014, 18:36
Honestly I couldn't care less what he does before the trip but once we start we ain't stopping. I'll drag his ass up that trail if I have to withdrawals and all. He might still come who knows...I'm not going to let it affect me either way


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kennyxedge
02-14-2014, 18:39
Good luck.

BougalouBlain
02-14-2014, 18:44
Also my friend has hiked the AT almost three times and I've known him for 20 of my 24 yrs of life. He's a good dude and he'd be a great addition to my hike. He may care more about drugs than he does about me but I've been there and that and I know he'll get past that if we get on the trail. I know what makes an addict tick and especially a lifelong friend. He means well and his hearts in the right place he just needs to get his ass there too. It's my hike and I'm not going to let him spoil it.


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Feral Bill
02-14-2014, 20:00
Sounds like you want to go. Do your research and have a good hike.

Hill Ape
02-14-2014, 20:23
seriously man, this is where the adage hike your own hike has larger life implications. your buddy, if he tries to clean up, has a long walk ahead of him, alone. support him, be there for him, but don't you're going to drag him over 2000 miles. he is nowhere near doing a thru hike right now

Son Driven
02-14-2014, 20:55
I bring this up because I work with the homeless in Minneapolis, and am considering bringing someone along who has issues with addictions. I saw some pot use on the trail in 2013, other then that I do not know what is easily found on the trail. I imagine it is like every where else, if you have a nose for it, and some money you will find it.

Hot Flash
02-14-2014, 23:58
Professionals are better but Alanon is free and is a great place to find support and gain basic skills.

AA isn't any more successful than going cold turkey. http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-effectiveness.html

Also, it teaches people that they have no control over their own actions, which is so very wrong. You DO have the power to change, nobody else does it for you. Not only that, it requires you to claim belief in a "higher power" which makes it a religious organization.

If you are going to recommend counseling for someone, then at least recommend counseling from an expert, not from a group that has the same track record as no counseling at all.

Sierra2015
02-15-2014, 02:24
AA isn't any more successful than going cold turkey. http://www.orange-papers.org/orange-effectiveness.html

Also, it teaches people that they have no control over their own actions, which is so very wrong. You DO have the power to change, nobody else does it for you. Not only that, it requires you to claim belief in a "higher power" which makes it a religious organization.

If you are going to recommend counseling for someone, then at least recommend counseling from an expert, not from a group that has the same track record as no counseling at all.
Well, I'm not going to fight about AA....

But specifically for the OP... I think Alanon could help. It's a support group for people who enable addicts. They'll talk about how not to continue giving the addict money or thinking they can change the addict. How not to feed into the drama and bullcrap of an addict. Things like that.

Because I can tell the OP he can't make his friend stay sober till I'm blue in the face. But if he actively goes out and seeks information for what he can do about an addict from people who've handled addicts before... maybe that'll help.

I think he should call the cops on his friend.... But that's just me.

rocketsocks
02-15-2014, 03:15
just a couple thoughts that I really don't care to have to defend or debate...but I will if ya really wanna.

...Programs are like backpacks they are not one size fits all, what feels like carrying a big orange dog to me may feel great to you.

...I think it's less important for our purposes here that we debate how one gets there, only that they get there.

...I guess that's it.

Sierra2015
02-15-2014, 03:16
just a couple thoughts that I really don't care to have to defend or debate...but I will if ya really wanna.

...Programs are like backpacks they are not one size fits all, what feels like carrying a big orange dog to me may feel great to you.

...I think it's less important for our purposes here that we debate how one gets there, only that they there.

...I guess that's it.
The best point made yet. :)

rocketsocks
02-15-2014, 03:21
The best point made yet. :):)............

MuddyWaters
02-15-2014, 05:38
Why did you want to hike with someone?
Dont be afraid to go by yourself, most do
You wont be alone, you will make new aquainances within a couple of hrs, possibly before even taking the first step. Literally.

Being tethered to someone else by a relationship actually lessens your chances of success. This is because when one person quits, it can cause the other to drop out as well.

Do what you can to to support your friend, while you can. But your friend isnt you, their life doesnt control or direct your life, and their problems shouldnt impact your direction with your life either.

If you want to hike the AT, do it. If you dont, then dont. Only you know what you WANT to do.

lemon b
02-15-2014, 08:27
Go. Maybe wait till friend gets out and still go as the clean team. That said Pace usually breaks up teams. I always end up solo on 30 day plus ventures, also no need to do it all in one year.

BougalouBlain
02-15-2014, 11:28
The funny thing is I've wanted to do this hike since about 17 but never really could do it because of being on probation so many times and being an addict. But my friend posted on Facebook that he was going and that he wanted a partner. I replied as soon as I saw it saying I would quit my job that I've worked very hard building a reputation at and join him on the hike. It just seems ironic to me that he's the one who invited me and now he probably won't go


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BougalouBlain
02-15-2014, 11:34
And also he wasn't taking a chance with this hike being that he doesn't have a job and lives at home with his mom but me on the other hand am giving up everything I have going for me except maybe sobriety but I'm the one going in the end and he's probably staying right where he is and it's a deep dark place believe me


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lemon b
02-15-2014, 13:15
Like I said The Clean Team. If someone starts using dope they will leave the trail anyway than the other can continue. Sounds to me like that chance is their for either of you. Thats one drug not on the AT too much moving. It ain't about him it was an us thing. If your an addict same could have happened to you. Put that crap behind and hit the trail. Change the routine and ask for help. Help each other.

Pedaling Fool
02-15-2014, 13:21
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coPB3GLpx98

HikerMom58
02-15-2014, 14:53
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coPB3GLpx98

I can't believe you posted this song... :D Everytime I saw this thread I started humming this song! AWESOME!

Hot Flash: They don't call it an addiction for nothing. If we were all powerful enough to kick addictions by ourselves there wouldn't be such a word.

The truth is we all need outside help. No one take care of themselves 100% of the time.

When we break a bone in our body, need stitches, surgery or whatever.... we need someone to help us out with that. It all boils down to where you believe that source of "help" ultimately comes from. :-?

I'm a fan of believing in a plan.

10-K
02-15-2014, 15:01
I haven't read this entire thread so if this point has already been made I apologize....

I think your chances of finishing have went up.

bpowell1014
02-15-2014, 21:15
My friend with whom I was going to hike the AT with overdosed on heroin last night and is now in the i.c.u. I don't think he'll be coming now but that leaves me without a partner. Should I still go? Can I still go being that I have no hiking exp. I do have the money to go but I was gonna quit my job but now I don't know if it's worth it


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I would check out the Facebook Group "Appalachian Trail Thru-Hikers Class of 2014"

There are lots of folks on there you could probably meet up with.