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illabelle
07-28-2016, 21:52
True story:

Earlier this month we were doing the SOBO hut-to-hut thing in the White Mountains of New Hampshire. I think it was when we were approaching the Garfield Ridge Trail that this incident occurred. As we neared the intersection, there were three northbound hikers and two leashed dogs coming towards us. The trail was wide at this spot and they were conversing among themselves, so we didn't really stop to chat, just a quick hello or how ya doing or something similar. As we passed one hiker was on our left while the other two were dealing with the happy-looking dogs on our right.

The guy on the left was agitated. He sounded surprised and puzzled and upset. "I've got POOP on me! Aaaa! Ugh! I've got POOP on me!! It's all over me! How'd I get POOP on me!!?!!"

We kept walking. I guess that was the right thing to do. What could we do? I mean, he had poop all over him. Would you want strangers staring at you if you just discovered that you had poop all over you? His friends watched him with wide-eyed concern as they held the leashes of the happy dogs. "I've got poop all over me!" he cried. "It's not MY poop!"

Soon we overheard that the dogs had poop on them - maybe that's why they were so happy - haha! Poor guy. Even though we were now a polite distance away, he yelled again, "It's not MY poop!" He must've thought that we figured it WAS his poop, and that he was a real klutz with toilet skills. His companions obviously knew it wasn't his poop. He said it just for us and he wanted to make sure we heard him.

saltysack
07-28-2016, 22:26
Sounds like he had a shi!@$ day!!!!


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Engine
07-29-2016, 07:01
***** happens!!!!

DuneElliot
07-29-2016, 09:30
I wonder if the dogs rolled in something and then rubbed up against him...I know mine have done that occasionally with deer or cow poop.

Funny that he should worry about what you guys thought of him though...I think I'd be trying really hard not to laugh, and probably failing miserably!!!

illabelle
07-29-2016, 10:10
I wonder if the dogs rolled in something and then rubbed up against him...I know mine have done that occasionally with deer or cow poop.

Funny that he should worry about what you guys thought of him though...I think I'd be trying really hard not to laugh, and probably failing miserably!!!

Pretty sure the dogs rolled in something. They were licking each other's faces with excitement and joy!

We didn't laugh out loud in front of the guy. No hiker stink quite compares with being smeared with poop, so we had some sympathy for his predicament. He's on a dry ridge, a few hours at least from wherever he's headed and probably can't spare any drinking water to clean up adequately. If he stops for a meal, every bite will be suspiciously fragrant.

But after we reached that polite distance, we couldn't contain ourselves. :D

Bronk
07-29-2016, 11:03
Some people just say that so you won't think its their poop. I once came upon a shelter and there was a young guy in there with a full beard smearing poop all over himself. First thing he said when he saw me: "Its not my poop!"

jeffmeh
07-29-2016, 11:45
While I value dogs for their loyalty and companionship, they do make great scapegoats for poop and farts. :)

saltysack
07-29-2016, 12:23
While I value dogs for their loyalty and companionship, they do make great scapegoats for poop and farts. :)

[emoji106]


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Tipi Walter
07-29-2016, 12:31
Reminds me of similar story except it involves human poop, the worst kind.

I was camping on Slickrock Creek and left my camp by Wildcat Falls IN BARE FEET big mistake to find a squat hole for a cathole deposit in the old Turd Account. I hiked far out of camp and climbed a little hill and dangit if I didn't step right into a pile of fresh human Stool sitting on top of the ground under a couple leaves AND NOT BURIED. It squished thru my toes and felt terrible so I ran off in small circles like I was trailing entrails out my butt from a wild dog attack.

All I could do was reach the creek and wash off immediately. Moral? Always wear camp shoes. Keep your eyeballs open and your butt cheeks clenched.

Scrum
07-29-2016, 12:49
Always wear camp shoes. Keep your eyeballs open and your butt cheeks clenched.

True wisdom. You could live your life by this motto. :rolleyes:

illabelle
07-29-2016, 13:58
Reminds me of similar story except it involves human poop, the worst kind.

I was camping on Slickrock Creek and left my camp by Wildcat Falls IN BARE FEET big mistake to find a squat hole for a cathole deposit in the old Turd Account. I hiked far out of camp and climbed a little hill and dangit if I didn't step right into a pile of fresh human Stool sitting on top of the ground under a couple leaves AND NOT BURIED. It squished thru my toes and felt terrible so I ran off in small circles like I was trailing entrails from a wild dog attack.

All I could do was reach the creek and wash off immediately. Moral? Always wear camp shoes. Keep your eyeballs open and your butt cheeks clenched.

Oh my! This is worse than walking barefoot in the chickenhouse!

Tipi Walter
07-29-2016, 14:54
Oh my! This is worse than walking barefoot in the chickenhouse!

I'm pretty squeamish around human poop, especially the poop of other humans. I can't even tolerate my own poop. For this reason I'll probably never move to India.

Scrum
07-29-2016, 18:33
I'm pretty squeamish around human poop, especially the poop of other humans. I can't even tolerate my own poop. For this reason I'll probably never move to India.

Tipi - Between this thread and the one on the White Mountains you are on fire today. Thanks for the laughs.

Adriana
08-08-2016, 05:21
There is no happier dog than one who has rolled in human poop! The AT must be like Disneyland for them.

saltysack
08-08-2016, 12:07
Reminds me of similar story except it involves human poop, the worst kind.

I was camping on Slickrock Creek and left my camp by Wildcat Falls IN BARE FEET big mistake to find a squat hole for a cathole deposit in the old Turd Account. I hiked far out of camp and climbed a little hill and dangit if I didn't step right into a pile of fresh human Stool sitting on top of the ground under a couple leaves AND NOT BURIED. It squished thru my toes and felt terrible so I ran off in small circles like I was trailing entrails out my butt from a wild dog attack.

All I could do was reach the creek and wash off immediately. Moral? Always wear camp shoes. Keep your eyeballs open and your butt cheeks clenched.

Haaaaaaaa maybe camp shoes aren't such a bad idea!!!!


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UL_Packer
08-08-2016, 22:19
Haha I cant imagine the look on his face when he figured out it wasn't "sticky" mud.

Drybones
08-14-2016, 18:56
While I value dogs for their loyalty and companionship, they do make great scapegoats for poop and farts. :)

My doberman is a constantly breaking wind before me.....I keep reminding him it's my turn.

imscotty
08-17-2016, 22:54
That hiker does protest too much, methinks!

illabelle
08-18-2016, 05:26
There is no happier dog than one who has rolled in human poop! The AT must be like Disneyland for them.
Don't know if it was human or not. Dog poop is awful, but human is really nasty and gross! Ugh!

:eek:

bamboo bob
08-18-2016, 06:59
If you've ever been in a barn you know why there's barn boots. The guy with trail runners is new.

Lnj
08-18-2016, 10:34
I would have been voted THE most hated person on the trail that day because there ZERO chance that I could keep myself from busting a gut laughing. Zero chance. Some things are just funny. I don't care who you are, that's funny.