Dating for Single Hikers

[mml373]

Note from a single guy who's been using "traditional" online dating sites to meet a lady hiker for far too long...without success, in terms of actually meeting someone who "really hikes." :-) And, evidently "camping" means RVing...not really camping. :-)

Are there any resources out there that can help single hikers meet? Match dot com is worthless in terms of meeting people who really are into hiking/backpacking at the level I enjoy (intent to through hike the AT.) I am aware of Meetup, but unfortunately I work rotating shifts and am unable to participate in my local hiking group's outings because I never know my work schedule far enough in advance (they book up more than a month out.) Still, backpacking (and perhaps an AT through hike) is something I want to share with someone special and cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

I see all these couples that have relatively little in common, always fighting, and just can't imagine ever going down that road.

Just trying to come up with options or see how others couples met through their love of backpacking. I'm an early/mid 40s guy near St. Louis, looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy. There's so much to see, to learn, and to experience and it would better to experience it all with someone.


Thanks in advance for helpful replies. :-)

[Heliotrope]

Hmmmm. I met someone who is new to back packing and wants me to show her what I know. And I'm excited about that. On the other hand it might be unrealistic to expect a romantic partner to have the same love of hiking you do. There will always be one of you who likes it more it seems. A more important aspect of the relationship might be how well you respect and support each other's differences.

I think it's very easy to meet women who are into a fitness lifestyle. Maybe just be open to the relationship evolving on its own. It helps to have other friends to share your hobbies with.

For instance I also practice martial arts but I don't expect my girlfriend to share the same passion for it.

Good luck.


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[Uncle Joe]

I like the mountains and being outside. My next partner probably should as well. I'm all for mutual respect but if you were married for years and developed a love for hiking during that marriage that's one thing. If you love to hike and be in nature and are single, you're probably going to want to find someone with at least some love of that and not just an understanding and acceptance of it.

[illabelle]

Your question is about how to connect with women who backpack, but my answer will apply to backpacking or to most any other activity.

You wanna meet women who backpack? or women who bike? or women who sing? or women who walk tightropes? or women who volunteer in their community? or women who collect coins? or women who skydive? Instead of looking on a dating site, I think the best way to connect is to involve yourself in the activity you're interested in. You will naturally find others also involved in the activity. What this means for you is go for a walk. Take a hike. Get out on the trail. People frequently come on WB with concerns about hiking alone. They're always told not to worry about it. Once they get on the trail, there are plenty of others and friendships will naturally develop. My observation is that a person with purpose (a trail to hike, a song to learn, a tightrope to walk, ....) attracts in a more positive way than a person who is waiting for the right companion before committing to a purpose. Whatever your passion is, just go do it. That passion will attract people who enjoy doing what you do.

On the other hand, I think most couples have areas of compatibility and shared interests as well as areas of conflict and disinterest. If you don't find a woman to share backpacking with, backpack anyway, and find a woman you can share other things with.

Just my opinions. I have no special knowledge or training. Take it for what it's worth. :)

[becfoot]

Have you considered volunteering on your local trail maintenance crew? In NY, there are always NY-NJ Trail Conference volunteer projects. Maybe things like that would be good.

[lonehiker]

I probably shouldn't respond as it is really off subject to the OPs question. But, we use my hiking as our alone time. That is, this time of year the wife will look over at me and ask, with irritation, "is it hiking season yet?" My response, "almost."

[ScareBear]

Note from a single guy who's been using "traditional" online dating sites to meet a lady hiker for far too long...without success, in terms of actually meeting someone who "really hikes." :-) And, evidently "camping" means RVing...not really camping. :-)

Are there any resources out there that can help single hikers meet? Match dot com is worthless in terms of meeting people who really are into hiking/backpacking at the level I enjoy (intent to through hike the AT.) I am aware of Meetup, but unfortunately I work rotating shifts and am unable to participate in my local hiking group's outings because I never know my work schedule far enough in advance (they book up more than a month out.) Still, backpacking (and perhaps an AT through hike) is something I want to share with someone special and cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

I see all these couples that have relatively little in common, always fighting, and just can't imagine ever going down that road.

Just trying to come up with options or see how others couples met through their love of backpacking. I'm an early/mid 40s guy near St. Louis, looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy. There's so much to see, to learn, and to experience and it would better to experience it all with someone.


Thanks in advance for helpful replies. :-)

There are TONS of things for a single in STL to do with others in the outdoors. MeetUp is a great place to start. St. Louis Adventure Group has a weekly night hike on Thursdays and plenty of other activities. None require more than a week or so RSVP. Same with St. Louis Singles Adventure Group. Try joining as many outdoor groups on MeetUp as you can to give yourself a wider array of outdoor choices.

[garlic08]

I agree with the posts above about getting active in trail organizations and maintenance, as well as just getting out and doing the activity. That's where the rubber meets the road, so to speak, and it's an incredible community of good people.

And you know, of course, you'll meet the right person only when you aren't looking. (Says the guy who's been married 35 years.)

[Starchild]

Pursue what you love to find the one to love. You mentioned Meetup. Well make time for it if you want to make time for that person you will meet. Or do the thru hike and let the trail take it where you need to be in life and perhaps meet that person there. Don't put off the AT because you are waiting to find her first as you may need to find her on the AT or as a result of your journey.


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[DuneElliot]

I have no suggestions, but I feel your pain.

[Puddlefish]

+1 to Illabelle's post. Find someone you like. You'll never find the exact person who you like, who likes you, with the same love for hiking, and who hikes at the same pace. One partner always has to be willing to slow down to accommodate the other partner, and they aren't going to do that unless they like each other. Start with the like each other part.

Meetup is great for what it is. I've met a bunch of interesting people through meetup, but the same kind of rules apply. Competition, distance, relative attractiveness (not necessarily physical), schedules, incompatible age or gender. Highly recommend just to share the activity with humans, but don't count on meeting that special someone.

Be attractive, don't be unattractive.

[Time Zone]

Just a word about meetup ... supply and demand of spots on an outing definitely varies from group to group and place to place, but I have seen groups where people almost always get in off a waiting list, because there are always people who drop off a hike in the last day or two, due to some unforeseen circumstance or a better offer or whatever. You could keep a bag partially packed and monitor the drop-offs as you get nearer an event that, you find out, you can attend. Might not be the case where you are, but I thought I'd mention it.

Could not agree more with illabelle. Best advice so far, IMO. Just get out there, however you can. You'll meet some fine people, regardless of romantic potential.

[Tipi Walter]

I agree with the posts above about getting active in trail organizations and maintenance, as well as just getting out and doing the activity. That's where the rubber meets the road, so to speak, and it's an incredible community of good people.

And you know, of course, you'll meet the right person only when you aren't looking. (Says the guy who's been married 35 years.)

This reminds me of a couple trips where I met a couple hiking groups and took their pics.

https://photos.smugmug.com/Backpack-2014-Trips-152/22-Days-Pisgah-Holyland/i-H2J4QGv/0/e022a447/XL/TRIP%20157%20521-XL.jpg
This was taken on the Mountains to Sea trail above Upper Creek in the Pisgah NF---App State college kids out for a trip.

https://photos.smugmug.com/Backpacking2011/Tipi-Walter-In-Mt-Rogers/i-V9SQmHS/0/c8f43908/L/TRIP%20123%20229-L.jpg
This interesting shot was taken on the AT near Mt Rogers and shows a women's backpacking group pulling a long trip and wanted me in the pic.

https://photos.smugmug.com/Backpack-2017-Trips-79/Quest-For-The-Wildcat/i-876RLzm/0/96bae900/XL/P1000179-XL.jpg
Here's a good example of dayhikers and area hiking groups. This is the Tellico Plains Hiking Club who I recently met on the Bald River trail.

[4eyedbuzzard]

And now we all finally know the REAL reason Tipi stays out in the woods for so long - Tipi's Hiking Harem. :D

[Tipi Walter]

And now we all finally know the REAL reason Tipi stays out in the woods for so long - Tipi's Hiking Harem. :D

When I got home my wife was really disturbed by this pic---Just kidding but she did get a good laugh---

39264

[firesign]

Note from a single guy who's been using "traditional" online dating sites to meet a lady hiker for far too long...without success, in terms of actually meeting someone who "really hikes." :-) And, evidently "camping" means RVing...not really camping. :-)

Are there any resources out there that can help single hikers meet? Match dot com is worthless in terms of meeting people who really are into hiking/backpacking at the level I enjoy (intent to through hike the AT.) I am aware of Meetup, but unfortunately I work rotating shifts and am unable to participate in my local hiking group's outings because I never know my work schedule far enough in advance (they book up more than a month out.) Still, backpacking (and perhaps an AT through hike) is something I want to share with someone special and cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

I see all these couples that have relatively little in common, always fighting, and just can't imagine ever going down that road.

Just trying to come up with options or see how others couples met through their love of backpacking. I'm an early/mid 40s guy near St. Louis, looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy. There's so much to see, to learn, and to experience and it would better to experience it all with someone.


Thanks in advance for helpful replies. :-)


Here's the best advice:

Stay single. You are the envy of many men currently in dead end relationships. All women start off sweet and cute and before you know it, you wake up next to complete opposite. Take a few deep breaths and this desire to find a mate will soon disappear. Being single isnt sad; its liberating; the solitude, the peace, the tranquility Vs a lifetime of nagging, whinning and bitching!))

[orthofingers]

See if you can get a job at Mountain Crossings at Neel Gap. You'll get to see a few thousand(?) female hikers every season.

Seriously, I agree 100% with Ilabelle's post. Go out and do what you're passionate about, join hiking groups, trail maintainence groups, trail magic groups etc. One caution though. Go to the women's forum and read the thread about "How to spot a Creeper" or some heading like that and don't be that guy they describe.

[Zea]

Here's the best advice:

Stay single. You are the envy of many men currently in dead end relationships. All women start off sweet and cute and before you know it, you wake up next to complete opposite. Take a few deep breaths and this desire to find a mate will soon disappear. Being single isnt sad; its liberating; the solitude, the peace, the tranquility Vs a lifetime of nagging, whinning and bitching!))

Being single can be awesome, but having the type of attitude that's apparent in the rest of your post will probably create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Anyways, you may find a girl that loves hiking... but only does day trips, or only wants to go to popular summits, or wants to bring 1000lbs of gear, or hikes really slow, or hikes really fast, or is always on her phone in the woods, or who hates that you are always on your phone in the woods, or who is hyper-focused on her blog, or who takes a million selfies... etc. Going into a relationship saying I want ____ may not be the best choice. Live your life, if you meet someone you love and start a relationship, there's a good chance you can get them to go hiking with you and compromise on what the trips entail. My guess is most guys who troll Meetup groups or get out on the trail with intentions of picking someone up are rarely successful. Also, many girls won't want to immediately go from being strangers to being alone in the back-country together, so you may want to have more in common than just walking with a backpack.
Backpacking isn't rocket science, if you meet someone who can walk the chances are you can get them up to speed in no time, if they're willing. There are plenty of couples on the AT where one partner was brand new at the start.

[JC13]

Seems to be that every year on the AT romance blooms. Heck, it even ruined a chance at the first calendar triple crown for a female.

[theinfamousj]

Note from a single guy who's been using "traditional" online dating sites to meet a lady hiker for far too long...without success, in terms of actually meeting someone who "really hikes." :-) And, evidently "camping" means RVing...not really camping. :-)

Ah ha! That explains my mother's lack of success! She usually describes her favorite hikes and camp spots and the gents she is on dates with suddenly get all, "Oh, yeah, well, um, I like the *idea* of camping..."

They think her professed love of camping is RVing. That makes so much more sense.

My Facebook mentions that I like to "camp in the remote wilds of the world". I suppose that is enough elaboration to say, "Not an RVer."

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[eggymane]

Hike on a busy trail during a bubble. Seriously, I've met more awesome girls there than anywhere. Bonus- unless your mouth is sewn shut the trail provides the perfect ice breaker for any situation.

[Slo-go'en]

It seems all the woman I meet on the trail are either too young or married. Neither of those are a problem for me, but apparently it is for them.

[ScareBear]

It seems all the woman I meet on the trail are either too young or married. Neither of those are a problem for me, but apparently it is for them.

ROFLMAO! No such thing as too young(must be over 18), only too married!

Although, in the immortal words of Inspector Harry Callahan "A man's gotta know his limitations."

The odds of a 45 year old meeting a partner in the bubble is pretty slim. Pretty much slim overall on the AT. The hardest thing for a 45 year old male to remember is that even a 30 year old gal is young enough to be his daughter...:eek:

You get to be...55 and the odds of meeting a partner anytime on the AT is nearing....:(

[evyck da fleet]

Try backpacking and not hiking in your searches. A friend wrote a bot to show me results using 'hiking' and 90% were the one mile day hike types on Saturday. People like to exaggerate their hobbies to seem more interesting.

I'm not sure why you can't try meetup and drop if you're schedule doesn't allow you to go. It sounds like there would be someone on a waitlist that could take your place with some notice.

[eggymane]

Try backpacking and not hiking in your searches. A friend wrote a bot to show me results using 'hiking' and 90% were the one mile day hike types on Saturday. People like to exaggerate their hobbies to seem more interesting

If you question the validity of this assessment check out the "Hikers" Facebook page. 99.999% of these hikers are no more than an hour from their vehicles.

I was talking to a girl here for a while who talked about how much she liked hiking and being out in the woods..turns out these hikes and being in the woods was no more than the local parks gravel path. I was so millennial and ghosted her.

[ScareBear]

If you question the validity of this assessment check out the "Hikers" Facebook page. 99.999% of these hikers are no more than an hour from their vehicles.

I was talking to a girl here for a while who talked about how much she liked hiking and being out in the woods..turns out these hikes and being in the woods was no more than the local parks gravel path. I was so millennial and ghosted her.

And, she enjoyed being in the woods and walking. Half the battle over already. So all you had to do was broaden her experience horizon...

But, you seem to be looking for a specific type of hiker. Maybe kinda a hard-core long-distance gal. A ready-made hiking/life partner. Who is going to be attracted to you as well. That sorta turns your dating pool into a shot glass.

How's it working out so far?

[OCDave]

... cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

..., looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy...

Is backpacking your only interest? Expand your horizons a bit. People are people. If someone finds you interesting, they might adopt your passions; you might adopt theirs. If someone finds you one-dimensional, they are less likely to follow you into the woods. Take a community ed class, go to a church social, join a co-ed softball league...Be a bit more open to possibilities.

If you insist on meeting this ONE magical hiking female...She is already happy on the trail, so move on or be alone.

Good Luck

[eggymane]

And, she enjoyed being in the woods and walking. Half the battle over already. So all you had to do was broaden her experience horizon...

But, you seem to be looking for a specific type of hiker. Maybe kinda a hard-core long-distance gal. A ready-made hiking/life partner. Who is going to be attracted to you as well. That sorta turns your dating pool into a shot glass.

How's it working out so far?

If I wanted to train a hiking partner I'd get a dog! Haha :)

[theinfamousj]

I am female, single, desirable (based on the number of suitors I attract), and like me some backpacking.

But someone so singularly focused on just one hobby? Pass.

I am multifaceted and am looking for someone who can understand what that is like.

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[mml373]

Totally appreciate all the wonderful perspectives here, and also appreciate that most responders too my original post in the way it was intended. Sorry to see that some have been burned by love to the point of wanting to stay single, but can certainly understand that perspective as well...or at least the part about being comfortable in one's singleness. As the author of that post pointed out, there are WORSE things than being alone (i.e., being in a bad marriage.)

Hiking is but one aspect of my numerous and varied interests, and I do understand that there are other things that are more important in terms of compatibility/long-term relationship success than sharing of a hobby. Still, it is one thing (of many) I would like to share with someone special.

I'll take some of the responses to heart. Totally concur with the notion of going along and doing things regardless of whether there's a Miss next to me. The Meetups are tough to get into around here, due to my schedule, but I'll at least try to make the standby lists. Somehow I have the feeling I'm not alone in terms of having a job that can get in the way of having a social life!

Indeed, one of the reasons I want to get out on the Trail is to be with other folks (besides coworkers at the office, LOL) and to learn/experience camaraderie. Plans for my SOBO hike have changed...I'll be going NOBO, when I go.

[Praha4]

try PinkBlaze.net

[Mags]

Do what you normally enjoy doing and have fun. The rest falls into place.

And, as said above, good to have more than just one passion. Substitute obsessive STAMP COLLECTING for obsessive backpacking, and would you want to be with that person?

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

...and specialization makes for a boring person, too. :)

[egilbe]

Hikers are already mobile and tbe experience changes with every footstep, with every change of seasons. The commonality is being outdoors. In the Winter I ski and snowshoe. In the Summer I walk. It doesn't have to be a long distance hike every day. Some days we stay home and watch Star Trek Voyageur. Some days we look for waterfalls. Some days it's bagging a 4k'er in NH. It's always different and it all started with a walk in a local park.

[scope]

I am female, single, desirable (based on the number of suitors I attract), and like me some backpacking.

But someone so singularly focused on just one hobby? Pass.

I am multifaceted and am looking for someone who can understand what that is like.

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I hear you, but I do think there are hobbies where its more difficult to meet someone with the same level of interest. And there are hobbies that mean more shared time doing them, like a longer backpacking trip, as opposed to an evening at an art studio. So being focused on finding someone that likes hiking/backpacking on the same level is a worthwhile singular focus, I think, in the short term anyway.

I'll use tennis as an example... lots of people play tennis, or I should say, they think they play tennis. If I want to meet someone I can enjoy going to the courts with, it needs to be someone that can keep up with me. Even better if I have to keep up with them. Probably don't want to meet someone where tennis is their life, so yeah, I don't want to meet someone with that singular focus. But if enjoying the sport I love with someone I love (eventually) is important to me, then I'm going to focus my efforts there first.

[theinfamousj]

Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.

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[FooFooCuddlyPoops]

Being single with a love for the outdoors kinda sucks, and kinda doesn't. On the plus side, you don't have to worry about scheduling hikes between two sets of work days. You don't have to worry about whether or not your partner can make the hike psyhically. But, it would be nice to do something with someone you care about. I would love to be able to show them the side of me that loves to find wild edibles, scale little rock cliffs, and climb trees. The side that most don't think I have at 230lbs, 5'2. Most do not see me as anything other than another bad eating, fat girl that. In reality, I am the person that backpacks and hikes more miles than most. I am part of a bunch of different meet-up.

[scope]

I like the mountains and being outside. My next partner probably should as well. I'm all for mutual respect but if you were married for years and developed a love for hiking during that marriage that's one thing. If you love to hike and be in nature and are single, you're probably going to want to find someone with at least some love of that and not just an understanding and acceptance of it.


Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.

And that's why its not the method by which I chose my wife. That said, if I were single again, especially at my age, I have a much clearer idea of where my time goes, and I'd want to have a partner where time spent at least had a greater opportunity of being together than being apart. Not disagreeing with anything you just said, but I do think there's more you might have read into it than was intended. Perhaps Uncle Joe said it in more simple terms.

[ScareBear]

Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.

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+1

It is nice to share a hobby, but if your hobby is a passion, you'd better be willing to compromise on the skill level if your future partner shares the passion but not the skill. I live in St. Louis. The odds of meeting a single gal my age that can ski as well as I can and has the money and free time to do it as much as I do is slim, then you have to be attracted to each other...

It's better, IMHO, that she shares the joy of skiing and goes when she can and skis what she can and when she can't she doesn't begrudge me my black run if she's on a blue, or a week or two out West without her if she has to work, or can't afford it. It would be hard enough to find somebody that can adjust to my work and family schedule, let alone my hobbies!

But, if she isn't going to play nice if I go somewhere to do a multi-day athletic endeavor without her if she can't/doesn't want to go, then that is the deal-breaker. Too dependent on being together is no bueno...

[MuddyWaters]

Hike on a busy trail during a bubble. Seriously, I've met more awesome girls there than anywhere. Bonus- unless your mouth is sewn shut the trail provides the perfect ice breaker for any situation.

Yup
Ive met several women on trails, all ages and status.
Perfect icebreaker
Married or not, a couple I spent a camp or more with are long time friends and stay in touch via fbook

If your in the market, it can be called networking.

[mml373]

+1

It is nice to share a hobby, but if your hobby is a passion, you'd better be willing to compromise on the skill level if your future partner shares the passion but not the skill. I live in St. Louis. The odds of meeting a single gal my age that can ski as well as I can and has the money and free time to do it as much as I do is slim, then you have to be attracted to each other...

It's better, IMHO, that she shares the joy of skiing and goes when she can and skis what she can and when she can't she doesn't begrudge me my black run if she's on a blue, or a week or two out West without her if she has to work, or can't afford it. It would be hard enough to find somebody that can adjust to my work and family schedule, let alone my hobbies!

But, if she isn't going to play nice if I go somewhere to do a multi-day athletic endeavor without her if she can't/doesn't want to go, then that is the deal-breaker. Too dependent on being together is no bueno...


I totally agree...have seen that side of relationships, too, and have RUN away from it. Codependency is the other end of the spectrum and is certainly something folks have to recognize and address if it is present.

Ah, dating in St. Louis. Good to see there are a number of us St. Louisians here.

Totally love the perspectives folks have offered here.

[Water Rat]

It's pretty simple - she is already out there on the trail. The woman you are describing is not the type to sit around, waiting for someone to contact her to go hiking/backpacking. She is already out there. Many women grow up knowing how hard it is to find hiking partners, so we just get out there and enjoy our time on the trail. Anything else just falls into place.

There is also a downside in trying to date someone who only has one common interest - what happens if one of you ends up with an injury and has to stop hiking?

[Dogwood]

Couldn't have said it better than Illabelle, Mags, and Scarebears last post #38

Best in context answer for their post on the thread was Scarebear's quote of Harry Callahan "a man has got to know his limitations." ;)

Join a trail club, do co ed trail maintenance crews, and engage in adventure. Adventurous folks usually are attracted to other adventurous people even if they haven't tried your brands of adventure. Make a play(ask the potential SO out on a backpacking trip) being yourself, honest, without the pretentiousness while going to a climbing gym, walking the dog, to the fitness center, walking a river trail, at a museum, walking a Botanical Garden, taking group tennis lessons, joining a road or MBing group ...

[Dogwood]

The world is yours and it's a BIIIG Place with lots of women.

[mml373]

It seems all the woman I meet on the trail are either too young or married. Neither of those are a problem for me, but apparently it is for them.

Oh, Good Lord! :eek:

[mml373]

The world is yours and it's a BIIIG Place with lots of women.

Thank you, Dogwood. Very true...

[windlion]

Have you considered volunteering on your local trail maintenance crew? In NY, there are always NY-NJ Trail Conference volunteer projects. Maybe things like that would be good.
Confirming on trail work crews. Met an incredibly wonderful woman who mentored me up to being a safe backpacker, and we're still friends. Easier for women to express interest on a work weekend than on the trail, I think.

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[mml373]

Have you considered volunteering on your local trail maintenance crew? In NY, there are always NY-NJ Trail Conference volunteer projects. Maybe things like that would be good.

I agree. :-) I'll check to see what's on with the Ozark Trail...not sure they're going to be active maintaining again till Fall.

[Runner2017]

Here's the best advice:

Stay single. You are the envy of many men currently in dead end relationships. All women start off sweet and cute and before you know it, you wake up next to complete opposite. Take a few deep breaths and this desire to find a mate will soon disappear. Being single isnt sad; its liberating; the solitude, the peace, the tranquility Vs a lifetime of nagging, whinning and bitching!))
Amen!

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[TOW]

Note from a single guy who's been using "traditional" online dating sites to meet a lady hiker for far too long...without success, in terms of actually meeting someone who "really hikes." :-) And, evidently "camping" means RVing...not really camping. :-)

Are there any resources out there that can help single hikers meet? Match dot com is worthless in terms of meeting people who really are into hiking/backpacking at the level I enjoy (intent to through hike the AT.) I am aware of Meetup, but unfortunately I work rotating shifts and am unable to participate in my local hiking group's outings because I never know my work schedule far enough in advance (they book up more than a month out.) Still, backpacking (and perhaps an AT through hike) is something I want to share with someone special and cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

I see all these couples that have relatively little in common, always fighting, and just can't imagine ever going down that road.

Just trying to come up with options or see how others couples met through their love of backpacking. I'm an early/mid 40s guy near St. Louis, looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy. There's so much to see, to learn, and to experience and it would better to experience it all with someone.


Thanks in advance for helpful replies. :-) Go to the trails you want to meet a lady, just get out there. No match.com, there is no easy way to do it man. Been there done that.Just go to the woods....she will be there..........

[mml373]

Go to the trails you want to meet a lady, just get out there. No match.com, there is no easy way to do it man. Been there done that.Just go to the woods....she will be there..........


Ha! I see you run a Hostel... ;-)

That actually fits into a dream of mine...to run such a place with a special someone.

Anyhow... Will be in touch when I'm heading through your neck of the woods!

[chasingthewind]

All the advice here seems spot on. I imagine walking into a club and saying "Hey ladies, anyone wanna hike 2000 miles?" is going to be pretty ineffective.

[JFKinYK]

Great advice so far. I'll add one piece that isn't mentioned. Move - west and/or north (Canada) to a smaller outdoorsy town.

I think you live in Illinois? Hit the Rockies and there are outdoor women hanging from the trees. Small towns have a tight sense of community with multiple clubs and mixer opportunities. Single affords flexibility - use it (and it worked for me...)

[Ethesis]

Amen!

Sent from my A0001 using Tapatalk

ive only been married 32 years or so so my wife is still in the seeet and cute stage.

[ScareBear]

Great advice so far. I'll add one piece that isn't mentioned. Move - west and/or north (Canada) to a smaller outdoorsy town.

I think you live in Illinois? Hit the Rockies and there are outdoor women hanging from the trees. Small towns have a tight sense of community with multiple clubs and mixer opportunities. Single affords flexibility - use it (and it worked for me...)

I'm trying to get a visual image of "outdoor women hanging from the trees"...:-?

So, Yellowknife is the singles mecca of Canada? I suppose things get real interesting in January, eh?

Yellowknife and hot night life....well...when the night lasts 20 hours I suppose something has to happen/give/break...

Yikes.

[Marie]

Sadly I can relate to this. My last relationship was "surprised by how much" I wanted to hike. Like the fact I stated, over and over "I only care about hiking, I only wanna hike, I NEED TO HIKE ALL THE TIME" wasn't clear. He liked hiking and camping too but didn't crave it the way I do. I just, at this point, assume I'm an anomaly & destined to wander alone. And I tell ya what...there's FAR worse things than that!! :)

[Praha4]

the AT is good place to meet an earthy woman

[George]

it is a pretty small niche statistically that will do long term hiking, in the US in any given year - I would guess only 7000 per year in the US will hike for a month or more, 1000 of whom will not be US residents - of those maybe 1/3 female - so 2000 out of a 160 million females in the US - that is 1 in 80,000

next with the OP's age say a candidate would be 30 - 50 year old, not married or in a committed relationship and within an hour drive, the potential pool may be 10 or possibly zero

it is easy to slam hikers for "pink blazing" but realistically many have little other options for connecting otherwise

[nadine3dogs]

Why not start a section in the forum for this purpose? I'm in the same boat and was thinking about this today while I hiked alone.

[NY HIKER 50]

Let's face it. I know the problems he has and I've given up altogether and just go alone. Too young. Too old. Like he said, crowded campgrounds, RV's and all the rest of the problems. I don't need to put up with that.

[MuddyWaters]

it is easy to slam hikers for "pink blazing" but realistically many have little other options for connecting otherwise
As they say in Co ski towns, where ski bum guys outnumber girls by a large margin:

Either bring it with you, or plan to do without.

[jjozgrunt]

This reminds me of a couple trips where I met a couple hiking groups and took their pics.https://photos.smugmug.com/Backpack-2014-Trips-152/22-Days-Pisgah-Holyland/i-H2J4QGv/0/e022a447/XL/TRIP%20157%20521-XL.jpg


I lead walks for my bushwalking club and this picture reminds me so much of some of the walks I've lead. Not uncommon to be the only male on the walk, there are just so many women involved in clubs in Oz. Been a few people found their partner in our club.

[George]

As they say in Co ski towns, where ski bum guys outnumber girls by a large margin:

Either bring it with you, or plan to do without.

yeah, well I certainly plan to do without when I hike - the wife did go on one overnight, and there was the "incident" in the fire tower, but I digress……..

[NY HIKER 50]

I lead walks for my bushwalking club and this picture reminds me so much of some of the walks I've lead. Not uncommon to be the only male on the walk, there are just so many women involved in clubs in Oz. Been a few people found their partner in our club.

But they are probably not interested in meeting anyone ( I almost said something else.)

[jjozgrunt]

But they are probably not interested in meeting anyone ( I almost said something else.)

When do you ever plan to meet your future partner? Can happen anywhere at anytime, male or female. Even read about it happening on the AT.

[martinb]

It's not all wine and roses if you meet that hiker chick. What if she's an UL whacko?

[RADHiker]

I used Zoosk and found the love of my life. My profile told my story and passion for hiking the AT. Early emails and texts weeded out the glampers from the backpackers until I found the real thing. We've spent the last three months hiking and fishing. I couldn't be happier. It can happen. Don't give up!

[Luna Anderson]

I dont know if you're married or not but finding a single woman who loves thru-hiking and going alone with you is quite hard. It's risky for her 'cause she might not know what you're going to do on the trails. Match dot com is just a dating sites and it's not a good idea to find your partner there. My recommendation is picking up a strange girl and share your passion with her. Maybe you can find a good one after failing hundred times, lol

[Tennessee Viking]

My wife and I are a eHarmony success story. Me from East Tennessee; her from Western Carolina. I am into hiking. She is more into animals and farming; more of a walking the greenway not trail personality.

For the OP and others, try trail maintenance; a AT trail crew or Trail Days Hardcore.

Group hikes - Meetup, REI...

Should be able to find a meetup or group Singles Into Hiking

Or just camp out Springer next crowd season and dub yourself "the Bachelor".

[LIhikers]

I guess I'm one of the lucky ones.
My wife likes to hike, backpack, and camp as much as I do.
In fact we're doing the AT on the 20 year plan together.

[Coffee]

"Enjoy hiking" on a dating profile typically seems to mean day hiking, not backpacking and certainly hardly ever means long distance thru hiking which is really a tiny fringe activity despite what it may seem like on forums like this. In the past, when I've described my longer thru hikes to people who "enjoy hiking", the reaction is usually either fascination or surprise - especially when it comes to hitchhiking and going a week without showering. Probably the best way to meet people engaged in an activity that is quite rare (long distance backpacking) is to go on a long distance hike.