View Full Version : You know you're a Thru-hiker when...
I'm going to make a post of this type on my blog and I thought I might come here to see what great ideas people can come up with. I know it's cheesy and cliche - but I don't care, it's also fun! It's a great way to give everyone "back home" who is reading and didn't hike with you a taste of the culture we have. I imagine most of them will be funny and pro-hiker, but I don't care if they are also serious or critcal.
Some of my favorites that I have so far are:
"when... you refer to the grocery store as 'resupply'"
"if... you know 'duff' is not just a beer on the Simpsons"
"if... you know what food has the perfect $/Calories/Ounce ratio"
Let's hear 'em, I know you have 'em!
SGT Rock
10-31-2007, 14:14
If you hate to throw away a plastic bottle because you know someone that could use it.
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 14:15
...when you're all through
The Old Fhart
10-31-2007, 14:17
When you realize you have a right and a left sock and they're not interchangable.......
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 14:19
...when you think everybody should cater to cuz you think you're special
Appalachian Tater
10-31-2007, 14:21
When you realize you have a right and a left sock and they're not interchangable.......
And you check to see if your socks need changing not by looking at them or smelling them but by squeezing them to see how crunchy they are.
dessertrat
10-31-2007, 14:24
When you go into town wearing long underwear under shorts and don't know what people are laughing at.
dessertrat
10-31-2007, 14:25
If every time you pick up a can of food at the supermarket, you not only wonder whether you want to eat the contents, but also wonder what sort of stove you could make out of the can.
When cotton clothing seems like the ultimate luxury.
When you pack for a non-hiking trip and your suitcase is almost empty. Why would anyone need more than the clothes they're already wearing?
When you go into town wearing long underwear under shorts and don't know what people are laughing at.
I do this in town already even when I am not thru-hiking. :O Of course, not as odd here....
warraghiyagey
10-31-2007, 14:35
When, after some time has passed since you finished you still wad your garbage into the tiniest knot possible before throwing it away.
warraghiyagey
10-31-2007, 14:36
...when you think everybody should cater to cuz you think you're special
This seems to apply to a high persentage of the population, hiker or not.
Jim Adams
10-31-2007, 14:37
when you keep your TP in a zip loc
geek
when you refer to driving somewhere as "slack-packing"
When you say your need to use the privy.
When you forget and put your trailname at the bottom of work emails.
When you think of miles in terms of how long it will take to walk there.
Footslogger
10-31-2007, 14:40
When "Au de hiker stank" is a tolerable fragrance ...
'Slogger
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
When taking a shower or brushing your teeth falls into the "optional grooming" category.
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
You'll fit right in!
You have found your people.:D
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 14:57
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
you only need about 3 weeks on the trail to qualify. hell, people starting at Springer call themselves a "thru-hiker"
warraghiyagey
10-31-2007, 14:59
When you make ramen noodles for dinner.
Footslogger
10-31-2007, 15:01
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
==================================
You're DOOMED ! ...you've got a genetic predisposition to thru-hike.
'Slogger
I am planning a thru... but for now only have about 300 trail miles on my feet...
SGT Rock
10-31-2007, 15:02
I assume it is because you are thru-hiking. Sort of like being a Marine. If you are still in the Marines, you can call yourself one, you don't have to wait for an honorable discharge before you become one.
That said, where does boot camp end for a thru-hiker? Fontana Dam?
Blue Jay
10-31-2007, 15:57
When you're wearing a pack, even when you dream.
I would say boot camp ends when one looks forward to doing 20 miles and then gets it done in only 8 hours.
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 16:14
when you don't treat/filter water. when you eat off others plates in restaurants. when you don't use leki poles or slackpack and don't stay in shelters or hostels and don't hang your food
Alligator
10-31-2007, 16:28
when you don't treat/filter water. when you eat off others plates in restaurants. when you don't use leki poles or slackpack and don't stay in shelters or hostels and don't hang your foodparaphrasing...when you are no longer a sheeple:D .
Jan LiteShoe
10-31-2007, 16:31
You know you're a thruhiker when you no longer need Kleenex.
:)
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 16:37
...when you are no longer a sheeple:D .
or a weenie
I've not yet thru hiked, but I did have dinner in my garage last night, which I cooked on the alcohol stove that I had just made.
Alligator
10-31-2007, 17:04
or a weenieI don't know about that one, some thruhikers are definitely weenies:eek: .
Cookerhiker
10-31-2007, 17:04
When you wear your crocs to church.
I am not a thru-hiker, but as a 370 mile section hiker I have been wet enough to stop worrying about where to step at stream crossings and just stomps through them.
When, at the outfitter, you ask: "What does it weigh?" before you ask: "What does it cost?"
warren doyle
10-31-2007, 17:19
When someone asks you how you feel about the weather and you reply "It is."
namehere
10-31-2007, 17:19
when walking twenty plus miles in one day is 'doable', not 'insane'.
Desert Lobster
10-31-2007, 18:07
When you ford the Kennebec!
katagious
10-31-2007, 18:14
when after washing your trail clothes for the 4th time your mother finally gives up on getting the stink out and threatens to toss them in the garbage if you don't get 'em out of her sight!
When your toothbruth, bandaids and Vit.I are all still in a ziploc bag in your bathroom and you've been off trail quite a while.
When you still have your headlamp hanging on your bedpost and use it regularly. :)
...when the five second rule becomes the five hour rule.
Skidsteer
10-31-2007, 18:57
When you still have your headlamp hanging on your bedpost and use it regularly. :)
...Or when you have headlamps in nearly every room in the house and one hanging on the interior doorknob to the main entry.
When you can actually look forward to a can of sardines for lunch?
When you have enough gear to completly outfit a whole 'nother hiker (or 2!)
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 19:02
When you ford the Kennebec!
damn! forgot
... you're losing weight in spite of eating massive quantities of the greasiest, sweetest, carb-loaded food you can get your hands on.
... 1500 feet of vertical no longer inspires fear, but a sigh or a shrug
... wearing the same socks or underwear for three days no longer inspires disgust, but a sigh or a shrug
... indoor plumbing begins to appear miraculous.
... news and politics become irrelevant, and weather becomes all-important
... you begin to anticipate and even participate in "random acts of kindness"
Uncle Silly
10-31-2007, 19:38
I am not a thru-hiker, but as a 370 mile section hiker I have been wet enough to stop worrying about where to step at stream crossings and just stomps through them.
As a 1600-mile section hiker, I still worry about where to step at stream crossings. I hate walking in wet socks & boots!
Trailjockey
10-31-2007, 20:31
When you think you should have taken Monkey Butt for your trail name.
When hot trail food is the highlite of your day.
When you no longer mind the mice at the leantos sharing your sleepingbag.
When you know that the next time your going to see any action (sex) could be 5 months away and you just shrug your shoulders:eek:
When you wear your clothes into the shower and wash them with shampoo.
the five second rule becomes the ten feet rule
have a large collection maps and guidebooks.
ask everyone they meet about tents, Gore-Tex, and water filters.
introduce themselves by a funny name.
insist on knowing the weight, to the nearest gram, of everything they buy.
don't like their 100% cotton underwear and socks anymore.
have an obsessive interest in weather, day length, elevation gains and losses, and how far they can hike in one day.
I am not a thru-hiker, but as a 370 mile section hiker I have been wet enough to stop worrying about where to step at stream crossings and just stomps through them.
As a 1600-mile section hiker, I still worry about where to step at stream crossings. I hate walking in wet socks & boots!
I agree. This phenomena usually only occurs toward the end of a long day of hiking in wet conditions where my feet cannot get any wetter and I just want to get to my destination to remove the wet footwear.
Lone Wolf
10-31-2007, 21:58
When you know that the next time your going to see any action (sex) could be 5 months away and you just shrug your shoulders:eek:
sucks for you. i got action every year i was out there. you must stink or somethin'
When you are not hiking, you inspect food packaging for nutritional value as a candidate for a future hike.
soulrebel
10-31-2007, 22:05
when some "trash juice" leaks in the trunk of your car and your wife asks if you're wearing your hiking shoes
Just a Hiker
10-31-2007, 22:09
You know you have been on the trail awhile when the the four letters "AYCE" get you sexually aroused!
Just Jim
Dakota Dan
10-31-2007, 22:14
When you get off the bus in your home town, at hikes end, and someone yells..."get back on the bus, we've got enough homeless people around here already" !!
Programbo
10-31-2007, 22:18
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
Then you are just a hobo
Dakota Dan
10-31-2007, 22:22
OR.... you're seen in a VA garden swapping shirts with a SCARECROW..
Skidsteer
10-31-2007, 22:23
I dont have any input to these great thoughts... HOWEVER.... What does it mean when you do most (if not all) of these things and you have NOT thru-hiked?
Then you are just a hobo
Phew!
Good thing you tacked 'bo' on the end.
She can shoot you know. :cool:
You shop for clothing by it fiber content.
Phew!
Good thing you tacked 'bo' on the end.
She can shoot you know. :cool:
Dont be giving away all my secrets now....:D
Dakota Dan
10-31-2007, 23:02
when you enjoy water at about any temperature.
when taking an emptied jug of milk or tomato juice, putting in water, shaking, and drinking to get the extra nutrition/cals and leave no waste. This really disgusts my kids.
when you only buy sardines in oil, cracking open can, drinking juice first so as not to spill any, finish opening can to eat fish. Sop remaining juice with bread. (I now only do this in private).
Can enjoy peanut butter served on anything at anytime.
when you know exactly how many eggs and exactly how long to boil said eggs in a 2 liter pot. Also, can crack, peel and eat an egg with one hand.
and so forth and so on.....
warraghiyagey
11-01-2007, 03:20
sucks for you. i got action every year i was out there. you must stink or somethin'
I'm not sure your hand moving constitutes 'action' as it is understood.
:p
Oh man, I'm gonna be in trouble for that one.
"I couldn't help it. It just came out.
". . . the Stay Puffed Marshmellow man?"
minnesotasmith
11-01-2007, 03:35
1) Will the rest of their life habitually squeeze the air out of a Ziploc bag before sealing it.
2) Will look at scenic hills and automatically think of routes to climb, spots to tent, and possible water sources.
3) Will see a coworker in the workplace wearing new clothes, and compliment them by saying, "Nice suit, Jim! How much does it weigh?"
4) Will see an attrative woman in high-heeled shoes, and no later than your third thought (first 2 thoughts being directed at chest-level) think, "She couldn't get 50' in Mahoosuc Notch with those shoes".
5) Will look avariciously at a flowing roof gutter drainspout.
6) Will find yourself automatically raising your nose at anyone outside wearing cotton, even if you're wearing it, too.
7) You'll be able to glance at someone's calves and tell how fit for hiking they are.
8) Odds are will develop a lifelong hatred for mice and loose dogs.
9) Knows where all 14 states the AT goes through are on a map.
10) Who brings emergency gear for short dayhikes that no one else in his family would.
11) Can drink warm water and think nothing of it.
12) When asked if he wants some food no one else wants, says "Yes! What is it?".
warraghiyagey
11-01-2007, 03:47
1)
. . . 4) Will see an attrative woman in high-heeled shoes, and no later than your third thought (first 2 thoughts being directed at chest-level) . . . .
Tippin your hand to an increasingly uncomfortable and skeeved out crowd.
minnesotasmith
11-01-2007, 04:59
Video: http://www.break.com/index/dirty_deeds_done_with_sheep.html
Uncle Silly
11-01-2007, 10:44
Video: http://www.break.com/index/dirty_deeds_done_with_sheep.html
So which one's the new girlfriend?
minnesotasmith
11-01-2007, 11:00
As noted above, I prefer women, myself. :D
As noted above, I prefer women, myself. :D
Ewe do? ;)
Uncle Silly
11-01-2007, 11:14
As noted above, I prefer women, myself. :D
Maybe I should've said "which one's the lucky ewe"?
http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?p=435713#post435713
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 13:21
When gear it the pinnacle of human achievement.
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 13:24
(doh) *When gear IS the pinnacle of human achievement
YeOldeBackpacker
11-01-2007, 13:37
You are comfortable sitting in a lanudomat in a poncho because you are washing all your clothes!!
warraghiyagey
11-01-2007, 13:40
When you've lost all consideration for what your lime green crocs look like in public.
When you see the word "game" or the prefix "mega" your first thoughts are Georgia and Maine.
Flush2wice
11-01-2007, 16:16
When you no longer stop walking to take a leak.
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 21:16
When you see a bear and the first thing that runs through your mind is how to get him off your berries.
-You buy several pairs of the same trail runners at the same time: "I like these. Do you have four pairs of them?"
-You sleep on a thermarest at home.
-You refuse to carry a Nalgene bottle EVER because it weighs too much.
SGT Rock
11-01-2007, 21:49
You wear socks on your hands to stay warm and see nothing wrong with it.
Jack Tarlin
11-01-2007, 21:51
*When you're still using a Ziplock wallet.....in January.
*When you walk thru your hometown, you look at someone's front lawn and
think "Whoa! Nice campsite!!"
*You gross someone out on Main St. by pinching off a nostril and firing a snot
rocket under your arm, and you can't figure out why she's got this horrified
look on her face.
*You catch yourself in your local bookstore purchasing a novel based primar-
ily on what it weighs.
*You disgust your girlfriend when she catches you squeezing the olive oil
from a tuna can directly into your mouth.
*Which isn't quite as bad as when she caught you doing a shot of A-1,
straight outta the bottle.
*Three months after your hike, you still put half a stick of butter on your
baked potato.
*You go a few days wearing the same shirt or socks, til one of your co-
workers pulls you aside and gives you a little chat, on behalf of the whole
office.
*You're still drinking PBR months later, not cuz it's cheap but cuz you
actually like it.
*When someone stops you on the street and asks directions, you invariably
say "Well, you go .2 down this road......" and then wonder why the guy
thinks you're a Martian.
*One night at three in the morning, you catch yourself eating a cold can of
Dinty Moore stew in bed, and you think the congealed day-glo orange
grease on the top is a big plus.
*When you meet a woman for the first time, the first thing you check out
are her calves.
I'm sure there's more, but that's all I have off the top of my head.....
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 21:53
thru-hiking. Sort of like being a Marine.Enlisted=selling your soul to the govt.
Thru hiker=soul runs free!
nothing alike
They will both put the hurt on you... I'll give ya that.
Skidsteer
11-01-2007, 22:19
In a consultation with the surgeon about your impending hip replacement surgery, most of the questions you have are about how soon you can get back on the trail(true story about my wife).
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 22:23
When we can live like the rest of the world and love it.
Quote from attachment:
"If you have food and the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, and a place to sleep, you ARE richer than 75 percent of the people in the world!!!
(Attachment found at Huckleberry Finn Hostel in St. Louis)
In a consultation with the surgeon about your impending hip replacement surgery, most of the questions you have are about how soon you can get back on the trail(true story about my wife).
Friend 1Pint attempted a thru this year, broke her foot in VA... needed pins in her foot... asked the Doc if she could get them in Titanium!!!
Skidsteer
11-01-2007, 22:49
Friend 1Pint attempted a thru this year, broke her foot in VA... needed pins in her foot... asked the Doc if she could get them in Titanium!!!
Naturally! :D
I have a few local friends who have had knee surgery and I immediately ask them how they came to need surgery with the thought that I will avoid that activity and I say a quick prayer that my knees (back, ankles, etc.) will never give out on me.
In a consultation with the surgeon about your impending hip replacement surgery, most of the questions you have are about how soon you can get back on the trail(true story about my wife).
Speaking of medical ones...
* if you've signed an AMI (Against Medical Instruction) form when a hospital wants you to stay for observation and you want to get back on the trail.
* if you have lime disease.
* if your feet still swell overnight, weeks after you finish hiking.
(lots of good ones so far, esp those last ones Jack Tarlin!)
- Sudoku
You've actually thru-hiked a trail.
Rift Zone
11-01-2007, 23:54
(lots of good ones so far, esp those last ones Jack Tarlin!)I hear that... My favorite one is in there. Well Done!
Uncle Silly
11-01-2007, 23:54
You've actually thru-hiked a trail.
I call foul: too obvious. :D
SGT Rock
11-02-2007, 07:22
You've actually thru-hiked a trail.
I thru-hiked the Clingman's Dome Trail this year!
I thru-hiked the Clingman's Dome Trail this year!
That's nuthin'. I thru-hiked Kinsman Pond Privy Trail this year!
SGT Rock
11-02-2007, 08:21
Sounds like a tough one. What is the elevation gain?
Sounds like a tough one. What is the elevation gain?
5 Feet: About 2 feet along the trail, then about 3 feet up a ladder to the view point.
5 Feet: About 2 feet along the trail, then about 3 feet up a ladder to the view point.
Of course there was the small matter of getting over Mt. Wolf and the Kinsmans to reach this trail.
Auntie Mame
11-02-2007, 08:41
I see a little volume like the red-neck series in the works...ed. by J. Tarlin, quite possibly?
Or at least a series of greeting cards.
SGT Rock
11-02-2007, 09:02
Of course there was the small matter of getting over Mt. Wolf and the Kinsmans to reach this trail.
Just approach trails.
Just approach trails.
This is true. However, approaching the Privy Trails is never easy when carrying a full load, but once you are there you can dump and run.
Hey hikers,
Thanks for all the great input! It was cool to see samples of others' thru-hiking lives and culture, even if I didn't personally identify with every one. I posted a list of some of my own, and added a lot of my favorites (with credit to the author of course) from here to my blog. It's not exactly on trailjournals, but if you want to check it out here is the link: www.geocities.com/smashignitionst (http://www.geocities.com/smashignitionst)
Thanks again, and keep on using those zip-lock baggy wallets!
- Sudoku
Someone asks you if such and such a place is withing walking distance and your first reply is "Sure. How much time you got?"
when you realize you forgot to flush
When you no longer think about, care about, or discuss gear just as long as it works........
When food is more important than money......
When a woman's hairy, muscular calves become your favorite piece of anatomy.....
When you forget how to eat with a fork......
When food is more important than sex.......
When mosquitoes become just another form of weather.....
When food is more important than air.....
When you only hike today because you know Katahdin is up there somewhere.....
When you realize you HATE hiking, but you're still heading north because Katahdin is up there somewhere.....
When you realize you LOVE hiking.... and Katahdin is still up there somewhere.......
When you're standing on a huge mountain with LOTS of others hikers around you, and now you have to hike five more friggin miles to get to the bar in Millinocket..............................
Emily Harper
02-29-2012, 19:57
When you impress people with you're food
When you talk to non-trail people because you think they might give you food
When you look at a full privy and thing you can squeeze one on top
When a child passes you and asks their mother why you stink so bad
When TP is more important then everything else in your pack but food
When you adore Bob Peoples and admittedly believe he is better than Chuck Norris
When sleeping next to a stranger each night isn't seen as a bad thing
When it rains you think "well at least the streams wont dry up" or "Finally I get a shower" or "You wish you had a hat that could catch water"
When you are excited to hitch hike
When the sound of cars reminds you of town food
When you think you see blazes
When you hate and love the trail beyond anything else
Mother Natures Son
02-29-2012, 20:31
When you pass by the local Ramen plant and think it would be a good place to work because they get discounts on Ramen.
off-pher
03-02-2012, 08:57
If you have ever mixed self rising flour and cold creek water and called that a pancake...........
if you snack on dried beans and thought this trail mix is really crunchy.................
Ferrousknight
03-09-2012, 11:42
I thru-hiked the Clingman's Dome Trail this year!
I like the benches that they put along it for all the tourists who can't handle the uphill and need to take a break.
when you can't remember how many times you've lost the same toenail
when moving cars startle you
when you don't know the real name of some of the nicest people that you know
when midnight means 9 PM
rocketsocks
03-09-2012, 16:33
When the fallen limbs in your yard look like snakes,but only to you!;)