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desdemona
02-02-2008, 20:22
This is not strictly speaking a female only thing but I had a negative experience today. I climb this rather challenging trail (scrambling).
Anyway, I went with this guy I have hiked with before. Just glad it was short!!!

I kind of figured he might be an alcoholic (he is NOT a significant other, nor a boy friend)-- however, I have never seen him drunk. He got in the car with me (I drove at least), and he had an alcoholic smell. I also think that since he smokes he was in bad shape for this kind of hike, and fell a couple times in a not too controlled way.

Anyway, he kept telling me where to climb and just come on over here, come on quick, but then would say "take it easy!!!" in places I clearly felt where safe for me. So it might have been more of a control thing. And perhaps a male chauvenist thing-- as I am clearly in better condition. He also let go of the dog a few times after I told him I don't do that, at least not on purpose. (I haven't taken the dog there and probably wouldn't again. At least I got the pack and it provides a very nice handle. Very helpful.)

I also, at one point, told him not to touch me while climbing, unless I asked. I meant that last time he pushed on me a few times which I dislike.
He wouldn't hear any of my attempt at clarifying and got nasty-- so I kind of climbed farther ahead and let him cool off.

Anyway, my point in posting-- if you ever have a
feeling about someone it's probably right!!
(I wasn't worried from a standpoint that I thought he would try something.
Far from it. But I did worry about his mental status-- just didn't imagine what that would mean.)

It would be interesting to hear anybody else's experiences....



--des

wakapak
02-02-2008, 20:33
Glad nothing bad really happened to you!

Goes to show that we should always go with our gut instincts....a good thing for all of us to keep in mind. I know for me, it's good to be reminded of that!!

Frau
02-02-2008, 20:35
Hiking brings out the best and the worst in folks. I hiked with a colleague who suggested to me that he would enjoy a short hike. He probably weighed 375 pounds, BUT had been a very athletic hiker and hunter in his younger days before the weight gain.

He used the opportunity to tell me ALL about his ex and after about 40 minutes he was spent.

The next outting was more of same on the Apple ORchard Falls spur off the AT. This time he made it about 20 minutes because this hike was uphill. I kept getting a funny feeling about him. When he asked to his home to sample a dish he had made but served it to me on a plate he picked up off the floor (it had been there for his dog to clean), I tasted one piece of carrot and then was happy to use my gastric bypass surgery as an excuse to eat not more. I left and never returned.

You are so right about something being amiss, when you have that feeling initially!

And, this guy is a doctor....:eek:

Frau

dixicritter
02-02-2008, 20:40
OK y'all are making me soooo glad that I hike with my husband and sons!

wakapak
02-02-2008, 20:44
OK y'all are making me soooo glad that I hike with my husband and sons!

LOL! I haven't really had any bad hiking partner experiences, (well, not with guys, but the girl i started my first thru with...well that's a whole other story!) but reading this just reminded me to listen to my gut on things. usually I tend to go with my gut more when I'm out in the woods and less while in the "real world" but it should be the same no matter what!!

Toolshed
02-02-2008, 21:11
About 10 years ago, I set out on another longer Trail with a woman (I'll call hikergrrl) who was simply a friend - we had known each other for years and had hiked on many short trips together, but usually with others in group settings. Hikergrrl was nice but very much a organic granola chick - Definitely not my style.

I had a serious girlfriend at the time..... who didn't care for the outdoors, but knew I loved backpacking and had no issues with me stepping out for a month or so.....

Anyways on our 3 or 4th night, Hikergrrl was in tears as we set up camp (separate tents thank god) - I asked her what was wrong. She said she was head over heels in love with me and the 2 months we had been planning this trip she was planning all along to tell me and hope she could secret me away from my girlfriend over the next month.

Hikergrrl then spent the next few hours sobbing and and in tears going over her heartbreak history and that this couldn't be happening again and it was all her fault (...I resorted unsuccessfully to the old "it's not you..." routine) and hoped we could at least continue the trip. But after several day of Hikergrrl vacillating between tears and puppy-dog eyes to snarling at me if I looked at a picture of my girlfriend, I said ****** it and pulled out, ending what should have been a great 4 week trip.

I have avoided her like the plague in the years since and have decided it is much better making hiking plans with my own sex to avoid an hidden emotionally charged issues....:sun

Blissful
02-02-2008, 21:13
Scary.

Follow your instincts, esp about other people and situations and either avoid them or get out. Hike safe.

envirodiver
02-02-2008, 22:15
It's safe to say that if you feel red flags there is a reason and they are not to be ignored. To often I have ignored my gut and done the slap to the forehead later with a "what was I thinking".

JAK
02-02-2008, 23:51
About 10 years ago, I set out on another longer Trail with a woman (I'll call hikergrrl) who was simply a friend - we had known each other for years and had hiked on many short trips together, but usually with others in group settings. Hikergrrl was nice but very much a organic granola chick - Definitely not my style.

I had a serious girlfriend at the time..... who didn't care for the outdoors, but knew I loved backpacking and had no issues with me stepping out for a month or so.....

Anyways on our 3 or 4th night, Hikergrrl was in tears as we set up camp (separate tents thank god) - I asked her what was wrong. She said she was head over heels in love with me and the 2 months we had been planning this trip she was planning all along to tell me and hope she could secret me away from my girlfriend over the next month.

Hikergrrl then spent the next few hours sobbing and and in tears going over her heartbreak history and that this couldn't be happening again and it was all her fault (...I resorted unsuccessfully to the old "it's not you..." routine) and hoped we could at least continue the trip. But after several day of Hikergrrl vacillating between tears and puppy-dog eyes to snarling at me if I looked at a picture of my girlfriend, I said ****** it and pulled out, ending what should have been a great 4 week trip.

I have avoided her like the plague in the years since and have decided it is much better making hiking plans with my own sex to avoid an hidden emotionally charged issues....:sunMan I love organic granola chicks, and she was a hiker as well. Too bad the chemistry wasn't there. My wife's not a hiker or a sailer, but I guess she's got all the right phermones in all the right places. Our daughters a beaut, so I guess phermones don't lie.

Anyhow, back to the thread, at least he was just an *******.
Trust your instincts, and best judgement.

desdemona
02-03-2008, 03:06
I never got the "I won't be safe feeling", hardly. Actually I was probably much safer than he was given that I was in much better condition. (Pickling your brain with alcohol and heavy smoking don't do wonders for you-- I think maybe he has some kind of lung condition as well, come to think of it.)

But he is a sick dude (not a girl/boy thing) actually, a gal that was an alcoholic would have been as bad I suppose. I gather that whatever issues might be under the surface come out with alcohol because the inhibitions are the first thing to go.

But still this reminds me to stay with my instincts on this. It's always the best thing.

BTW, I think some other situation might have been bad as well. Frau described a pretty repulsing event OFF the trail.
Though IF I had listened to him trying to speed me up, that might have been really dangerous. I know the first rule of climbing is "stay within your limits". At least I kept my head at that point.


--des

Crazy Larry #1
02-03-2008, 07:28
You know, my dog Sally says she gets the same gut feelings about me when we hike. I don't understand exactly what she wants out of me, I mean we can hike twenty miles (we haven't yet, just sayin' though) and she will act all disgruntled like I haven't hiked near enough. I mean that dog just does not get tired?

Is it me or her?

Lilred
02-03-2008, 10:00
I hiked for awhile with a guy a few years back, met him on the trail. Turned out to be a huge mooch. shared a bunkhouse with me at NOC, didn't give me any money. I had to pay for both our laundry and the soap. He borrowed my phone at one point and talked for almost an hour, wearing down my battery. Finally, when we got to Robbinsville, he said he needed to go home. I ended up paying for the hotel bill, and glad to do it, just to be rid of him. He kept saying he'd pay me back, took down my address, but of course, I'm still waiting for the money.....

tina.anderson
02-07-2008, 18:04
I hate when hiking partners stick you money. I have had similar experiences to yours. We have to put our foot down and not let these people mooch off of us anymore. Although I would rather have a hiking partner like that than one who can't stop drinking.

zoidfu
02-07-2008, 18:07
My friend on here(Native Pennsylvanian)drinks too much and he makes me drink too. He gets moody and he beats me. He runs off thru hikers and tells them to stay out of PA. He's sullen and quiet when he's not yelling at someone or something or some animal.

AlwaysHiking
02-07-2008, 19:05
A few years ago my cousin and I decided on a last minute trip to somewhere in WV. He and I are really good hiking partners but somehow this 'friend' of mine ended up inviting himself along. My cousin had to back out last minute for a valid reason but it left me with a guy I already couldn't stand much. I figured it couldn't be that bad and the weather was supposed to be beautiful and I had already bought our food so we went just the two of us.

He drove me nuts. He kept telling me how and where to hike. He insisted in going in front but couldn't follow the trail to save his life. These are trails I've hiked for a decade and he'd never been before yet he thought he knew better than me.

In camp he walked around in his briefs. It's one thing to change in front of another hiker, but a completely different thing to just hang out in tighty whities; not cool no matter who it is.

He almost started a forest fire, he cut down living trees, I blasted him left and right constantly about his impact. He didn't seem to care.

He kept trying to get an invitation to my tent for the night. He thought that our little trip meant we were a couple and acted hurt that I didn't share his feelings. THANK GOD I HAVE TWO TENTS!!

The next morning when I woke up he had already eaten all of breakfast plus most of lunch. Luckily I don't usually eat breakfast so I was OK. At lunch he got mad that I wouldn't share what was left with him. I wouldn't let him anywhere near it.

The worse part was how he constantly picked fights. He started bashing certain aspects of hiking and complaining about things he knew nothing about at all. At some point I put him in timeout and told him he wasn't allowed to talk to me for another 30 min. He stomped off up the trail in the wrong direction throwing a little temper tantrum.

I cut the trip short by a day because I couldn't stand him anymore. On the way back to the car we picked blueberries. He picked and ate three quarts on his own and complained the whole way home about his stomach issues that resulted. I complained about the results he left in my bathroom when we got back to my house.

That's hands down the worst trip I've ever had. I've been out a couple days and gotten violently ill and stuck there for another 24 hrs, and that wasn't even as bad as the trip with this guy.

gungho
02-07-2008, 19:36
OK y'all are making me soooo glad that I hike with my husband and sons!
After reading several of these posts I have to agree with you. My wife makes an excellent hiking partner. I hate the "downs" and she hates the "ups",so it evens out by the end of the day.

Bob S
02-07-2008, 19:52
I hiked for awhile with a guy a few years back, met him on the trail. Turned out to be a huge mooch. shared a bunkhouse with me at NOC, didn't give me any money. I had to pay for both our laundry and the soap. He borrowed my phone at one point and talked for almost an hour, wearing down my battery. Finally, when we got to Robbinsville, he said he needed to go home. I ended up paying for the hotel bill, and glad to do it, just to be rid of him. He kept saying he'd pay me back, took down my address, but of course, I'm still waiting for the money.....


I think I know this guys twin brother, he lives in Toledo Ohio and is named Paul. I donít even answer his e-mails or the phone when he calls any more.

Two Speed
02-07-2008, 20:10
Been a mixed bag for me. Oddly enough all the folks I met through WB have been good hiking partners, if not great hiking partners.

Have had two negative experiences. The horror show was a long distance hike I did back in the spring of '05. Believe it or not this chick managed to piss Bob Peoples off.

Twice.

Without getting into details I had to cut that one short; claimed my feet were too bad, took her back to her truck and made tracks for Marietta to regroup. That whole episode really chapped my hide.

On the positive side, Skids, RockStar, Hippo, DWM, ya'll have been great to hike and hang out with and I just can't say enough good things about ya. Haven't hiked with JRabbit, but the little bit we've hung out she's been good company. Also gotten to hang out a little with Sly, Tha Wookie, Dixi, Sgt Rock, Ed Bell, Nightwalker . . . learned a bunch from ya'll and really enjoyed your company. Miss Janet is another WB'er that I'd hang out with any time I can. Haven't met the Frolicking Dinosaurs in person yet, but I'm gonna fix that one day.

desdemona
02-08-2008, 00:00
I think I know this guys twin brother, he lives in Toledo Ohio and is named Paul. I donít even answer his e-mails or the phone when he calls any more.

Actually this guy may be his triplet. He knows I have a spare bedroom. He was going on and on about his housing situation. I think he was hoping.. I'm sure if he moved in it might take years to get him out!! But no way. Even before I knew he was a drunk.

Yikes but some of your stories are awful!! I think the story of the guy going around the campsite half naked and nearly starting a forest fire sort of tops them off. I know about the fighting aspect. I think this guy could do that. I backed away as he was going off though.

--des

Pokey2006
02-08-2008, 04:05
This is why I hike alone.

It's not uncommon for gals to get a weird attitude from male hikers like it was your first day ever stepping foot in the woods. I get "lectures" all the time from guys who have fewer miles under their belts than me. Not sure what it's all about. Not like we're doing something macho like playing football. We're just walking for crying out loud.

Can't say I have any war stories to rival these, though. Mainly because if someone bugs me, I simply stop hiking with them (easier said than done sometimes).

NativePennsylvanian
02-08-2008, 09:38
My friend on here(Native Pennsylvanian)drinks too much and he makes me drink too. He gets moody and he beats me. He runs off thru hikers and tells them to stay out of PA. He's sullen and quiet when he's not yelling at someone or something or some animal.


You're gonna get the beating of a lifetime for that.

taildragger
02-08-2008, 09:50
I cut the trip short by a day because I couldn't stand him anymore. On the way back to the car we picked blueberries. He picked and ate three quarts on his own and complained the whole way home about his stomach issues that resulted. I complained about the results he left in my bathroom when we got back to my house.


:eek:

Sorry, but that part of the story has got to be the funniest thing that I've read outside of the "sex in a hammock thread" by Neo

desdemona
02-08-2008, 15:27
You're gonna get the beating of a lifetime for that.

I would not quite worded it in a such a flip way as this is quite potentially a dangerous situation. I would run NOT walk away from this individual!!
Any time an individual is that combatitive there is an issue. I believe my "friend" may have similar potential though he hasn't quite worked up there.


--des

dixicritter
02-08-2008, 17:00
My friend on here(Native Pennsylvanian)drinks too much and he makes me drink too. He gets moody and he beats me. He runs off thru hikers and tells them to stay out of PA. He's sullen and quiet when he's not yelling at someone or something or some animal.


You're gonna get the beating of a lifetime for that.


I would not quite worded it in a such a flip way as this is quite potentially a dangerous situation. I would run NOT walk away from this individual!!
Any time an individual is that combatitive there is an issue. I believe my "friend" may have similar potential though he hasn't quite worked up there.


--des


Actually des, I think this is a case of a couple of guys that have wandered into the Female Hikers forum and haven't left the Neanderthal ways outside where they belong. ;):D



:eek:

Sorry, but that part of the story has got to be the funniest thing that I've read outside of the "sex in a hammock thread" by Neo

This one too. :p Silly guys, must be color blind... :eek:

taildragger
02-08-2008, 17:03
Actually des, I think this is a case of a couple of guys that have wandered into the Female Hikers forum and haven't left the Neanderthal ways outside where they belong. ;):D




This one too. :p Silly guys, must be color blind... :eek:


my uh... monitors going out....hard to tell the shades of grey...

ChimneySpring
02-08-2008, 17:16
I kind of figured he might be an alcoholic (he is NOT a significant other, nor a boy friend)-- however, I have never seen him drunk. He got in the car with me (I drove at least), and he had an alcoholic smell.

Mmmmkay... and you continued on to your hiking destination why?

dixicritter
02-08-2008, 17:47
my uh... monitors going out....hard to tell the shades of grey...

LOL.... good one.

sarbar
02-08-2008, 19:58
All I am saying is...you ladies are WAY TOO NICE. Mooches, jerkwads and vacuums need to be kicked to the curb from the moment you smell it out. Don't be nice. I know we ladies are raised to not be rude..but, that is how men (and some women) like that take advantage of women!

Learn to be rude. It does wonders. And if they won't their share? Well, waaahhh. They can sleep outside. You are not responsible for anyone but yourself and children you birth ;)

Well, that and a large container of pepper spray - a girl's best friend.

Toolshed
02-08-2008, 20:03
Learn to be rude. It does wonders. And if they won't their share? Well, waaahhh. They can sleep outside. You are not responsible for anyone but yourself and children you birth ;)
....

It's not being rude, it just being direct. Nothing rude about being direct.
"No thank you - I do not wish to hike with you." or "I am not giving (or sharing with you) anything else. You need to leave now"
and then end the conversation and move on.

I personally don't understand why anyone would want to keep hiking with or hang out with someone that was mooching, drinking, farting, hanging out partially dressed, unkempt or obnoxious. ....But then again... I just realized I don't have any friends.......:D

AlwaysHiking
02-08-2008, 23:07
Learn to be rude. It does wonders. And if they won't their share? Well, waaahhh. They can sleep outside. You are not responsible for anyone but yourself and children you birth ;)
There's no excuse for rudeness, ever. How would that make you any better than someone with poor social skills? Typically with creeps a negative reaction only tends to make the whole thing worse. Or if they're trying to get under their skin, you just gave them the satisfaction they were looking for. People like the guy in my story are not worth the time or effort it takes to be rude.


I personally don't understand why anyone would want to keep hiking with or hang out with someone that was mooching, drinking, farting, hanging out partially dressed, unkempt or obnoxious. ....But then again... I just realized I don't have any friends.......:D

Who said anything about wanting to be in that situation. Trust me ladies, if I could have predicted someone I had a minor dislike for would turn into a flat out creep, then I wouldn't have gone.

EWS
02-09-2008, 03:46
If anyone needs a bad hiking partner experience, I'll give you a primer. It'll save you from getting possibaly hurt later on.

Smudge
02-09-2008, 04:09
Yikes, I'm glad I hike with my brother!!

Gary-G
02-09-2008, 04:20
Happy to see everyone knows to keep your wits about you at all times! (In the outdoors or in the city) Spend one night watching your local news (depressing!) and you will see how dangerous it is to be careless.

sarbar
02-09-2008, 14:43
There's no excuse for rudeness, ever. How would that make you any better than someone with poor social skills? Typically with creeps a negative reaction only tends to make the whole thing worse. Or if they're trying to get under their skin, you just gave them the satisfaction they were looking for. People like the guy in my story are not worth the time or effort it takes to be rude.

Rudeness can keep you alive. So can be being cold, frigid and stand offish. Many women think they HAVE to be nice, you don't. In a bad situation being nice leads those types of men on.

AlwaysHiking
02-09-2008, 15:44
Rudeness can keep you alive. So can be being cold, frigid and stand offish. Many women think they HAVE to be nice, you don't. In a bad situation being nice leads those types of men on.

I won't go through life being rude. You can be firm and stand your ground without being rude.

warraghiyagey
02-09-2008, 15:51
I won't go through life being rude. You can be firm and stand your ground without being rude.
:sun:sun:sun:sun

desdemona
02-09-2008, 17:52
>Actually des, I think this is a case of a couple of guys that have wandered into the Female Hikers forum and haven't left the Neanderthal ways outside where they belong. ;):D

Was responding to a remark about someone getting the "beating of their lives" as being a flip remark.

Well said, btw.


Mmmmkay... and you continued on to your hiking destination why?

That's a really good question. And I think it is my lack of experience with alcoholism, strange though that may be (and I am old enough). But I don't think I took it as seriously as I should have. I have been around people who have had a drink or two (and weren't alcoholic) and they would certainly smell a bit like alcohol. But real alcoholics-- like/no experience.

Fortunately for me it was a short hike. The effort of hiking seemed to dry him out a bit, though his climbing abilities were very impaired. (Lucky for me.) This is also a pretty populated area. Not that I would do it again.

My first real experience, but this is definitely the last one I wish to have.

I also wished to give this as a cautionary tale.

--des

Frosty
02-09-2008, 18:56
I won't go through life being rude. You can be firm and stand your ground without being rude.Sarbar didn't actually say to go through life being rude. She said it is sometimes necessary. Standing your ground and being firm is very effective with polite, civil people, but some people simply are neither polite nor civil themselves, nor do they take hints. Or even a direct statements.

We all prefer to be polite. And we all have boundaries. Sometimes in life you have to prioritize.

I believe it is okay to be rude to a person who crashes your boundaries, or is too intimate, or is threatening in any manner. First priority: Personal safety, both physical and emotional. Second priority: be polite.

My 2 cents.

AlwaysHiking
02-09-2008, 19:35
Sarbar didn't actually say to go through life being rude. She said it is sometimes necessary. Standing your ground and being firm is very effective with polite, civil people, but some people simply are neither polite nor civil themselves, nor do they take hints. Or even a direct statements.

We all prefer to be polite. And we all have boundaries. Sometimes in life you have to prioritize.

I believe it is okay to be rude to a person who crashes your boundaries, or is too intimate, or is threatening in any manner. First priority: Personal safety, both physical and emotional. Second priority: be polite.

My 2 cents.

I still stand on the grounds that rudeness would only make a complicated situation worse.

A person with poor social habits that oversteps boundaries can be well told off without being rude.

sarbar
02-09-2008, 19:59
I still stand on the grounds that rudeness would only make a complicated situation worse.

A person with poor social habits that oversteps boundaries can be well told off without being rude.

My point was not that one goes through life being rude, Frosty got my point. My view is rather that in a situation where your safety is in issue, rudeness may be your only choice - and by that I mean not being a nice, laid back woman who goes along with the flow to not upset people.

We are responsible for our safety in life, and especially so on the trail. Don't make yourself into a victim. Walk tall with pride in your spine. Look men in the eyes, stand firm in your convictions and never feel pressured to be nice, civil or to not cause a scene. This can mean not going on a trip, turning back or simply saying "you are not welcome to join me". Most of all, not letting someone into your car for a trip when drunk.

Years ago I had a man decide he needed to join my kid and I on a hike - and he was a stranger. Should I have been nice and asked him to join us? Heck no! Rather I was frosty and got my point across. Some might say I was rude - but I also had my 6th sense telling me this man was no good.

Not everybody in this world is good. You don't have to be paranoid but you need to be prepared. I'd rather hurt someones feelings a bit than lose money, time or my life. If the person is a mooch you haven't lost anything by being rude except for a moochy anchor. And as for the drunk guy, what if he had fallen and hurt himself? He could have then sued the OP for "allowing him to go out there". And I don't joke about that either. What if being drunk he had grabbed the wheel while she was driving?

And after this I will shut up:
Unless you are really, really good friends with a man you are playing with fire by going off into the wilderness alone with an unstable man. You are safer to go by yourself with a large container of bear spray. Yes, I hike one on on with men, but I choose my male partners carefully. These are people my husband is fine with and who we also are friends with. There are many men who assume that if you go somewhere with them it is a date! Even if you TELL them it isn't. Ladies! Use your brain and listen to your inner voices! Don't put yourself in danger when you don't have to!!!!

AlwaysHiking
02-09-2008, 21:28
Ladies! Use your brain and listen to your inner voices! Don't put yourself in danger when you don't have to!!!!

I hope your not telling me I'm not using my brain... :-?

I guess the reason I'm not seeing eye to eye with you is because you're putting me into a stereotype. I personally believe the reason women are targets is because people do assume the same as you do. That all women are weak because they are nice. You don't know me, I'm not some ditsy woman who doesn't have her wits about her and smiles polity when something feels off or wrong.

I choose to use awareness and quick thinking to keep myself out of dangerous situations in the first place. I was never in any danger with the guy I went out with. Yes, he was crude and creepy but not dangerous. Had I for one second thought he was dangerous, I wouldn't have been there in the first place. This was just an instance of poor social behavior. A man who thinks he's god's gift to women isn't necessarily dangerous. Being annoying doesn't make him dangerous either.

You know who else thinks women are targets because they're nice? People who prey on them. By publicly stating that 'a nice, laid back woman who goes along with the flow to not upset people' is in any more danger than a women who doesn't is validating the opinions of people who would mean harm.

I'm a woman, I'm smart and have a good sense of my surroundings every time I'm in the woods. By myself or not.

dixicritter
02-09-2008, 21:33
OK Ladies, I think it is time that we just agree to disagree here because we aren't getting anywhere with this back and forth arguing over whether or not to be rude. How about we each do what works best for us.

desdemona
02-10-2008, 00:18
turning back or simply saying "you are not welcome to join me". Most of all, not letting someone into your car for a trip when drunk.

Years ago I had a man decide he needed to join my kid and I on a hike - and he was a stranger. Should I have been nice and asked him to join us? Heck no! Rather I was frosty and got my point across. Some might say I was rude - but I also had my 6th sense telling me this man was no good.

Not everybody in this world is good. You don't have to be paranoid but you need to be prepared. I'd rather hurt someones feelings a bit than lose money, time or my life. If the person is a mooch you haven't lost anything by being rude except for a moochy anchor. And as for the drunk guy, what if he had fallen and hurt himself? He could have then sued the OP for "allowing him to go out there". And I don't joke about that either. What if being drunk he had grabbed the wheel while she was driving?

And after this I will shut up:
Unless you are really, really good friends with a man you are playing with fire by going off into the wilderness alone with an unstable man. You are safer to go by yourself with a large container of bear spray. Yes, I hike one on on with men, but I choose my male partners carefully. These are people my husband is fine with and who we also are friends with. There are many men who assume that if you go somewhere with them it is a date! Even if you TELL them it isn't. Ladies! Use your brain and listen to your inner voices! Don't put yourself in danger when you don't have to!!!!


Perhaps I over did this, but he was not falling over drunk. He smelled of alcohol. I think I didn't know that much (had a fast education, I'd say in alcohol education). In retrospect only do I think he was an alcoholic. I am lucky perhaps that I've had a pretty sheltered life on that subject. Initially he was in a good mood, not too good a mood. Seemed happy, etc. Had no idea of how combatitive or nasty he would get.

Yes, he was an impaired hiker. ANY hiker could have gotten hurt where I was climbing. So anyone could have sued you? Gee, now there's a frightening thought! Perhaps we should have personal liability waiver slips?!

I still don't think he would have grabbed the steering wheel.

BTW, this was not wilderness in the usual sense. There are other people frequently enough.

Still, would I do this again? Never! And I still think it is an excellent cautionary tale of probably the case of not trusting my gut on this one enough.

As for being rude, etc. I think maybe the writer meant that we women like not to hurt people's feelings. I think that is indeed true.




--des

sarbar
02-10-2008, 02:24
As for being rude, etc. I think maybe the writer meant that we women like not to hurt people's feelings. I think that is indeed true. --des

Yes, that is what I meant :) I just worry that is all.... about other women and can tend to lecture sheerly out of wanting to protect others. Turning 35 next month and have met way too many weirdos :o