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View Full Version : When is it time to say goodbye?



Ashman
03-30-2008, 09:33
I know this isn't about hiking with a dog per se but I know many of you have had to make the hard call when your four legged hiking partner has come to the end of the trail. I have a 12 year old golden retriever. She is by far the best dog I have ever had. Both my kids learned to walk on her literally. Well she is an old girl who has started to slow down. She has developed several (over 10) bumps or masses through out her body that are detectable by touch. She has a huge tumor on her ear. She has been like this for the past year and aside from some soreness after alot of exercise she has been fine. Friday she started throwing up what looks like white foamy phlem. She hasn't eaten since then (her choice) and every time she takes in water she pukes again. Yesterday we took her to an emergency clinic, they ran some blood tests and and xray and couldn't really find anything wrong. The vet said she palpated and discovered a mass in her abdomen but wasn't sure what it was. Our regular vet said there was no way to know what what the bumps were without a biopsy. At $75 a pop that didn't seem wise, if they did come back as cancer I don't see putting a dog that old through surgery. She got some medicene at the vet and was in better spirits last night but that has worn off, and the stuff they sent us home with isn't helping her. She is still puking her breathing is real short shallow. I dont want her to suffer but I don't want to put her down if she can pull through this. Man, how do you make this call?

cowboy nichols
03-30-2008, 10:04
I had to make this decision when my beloved german shepard developed cancer. She was 15 and had been my constant companion for all of those years and at the end when she was in pain I opt to put her to sleep it was very painful for me but the best for her. My heart goes out to you and your friend.

Two Speed
03-30-2008, 10:12
Tough decision, and unfortunately you're the only one who can make it.

That said my standard is when there's no chance of any quality life left it's time. Did the vet offer any hope she'd get over this, that she'd have any more good days ahead of her?

ed bell
03-30-2008, 10:13
I feel for you on this one, Ashman. It has been my experience that the inability to hold down water is a sign of organ failure. I wouldn't worry about the bumps/ growths you can feel under the skin. My buddy had a dog that lived over 5 years with something I believe to be similar. Being reluctant to run biopsy tests is exactly how I would handle that. Hopefully she is just having some digestive problems. Did the vet or clinic indicate any signs of dehydration? Did they give any IV fluids? Since this started on Friday, I would give it a bit more time to see if anything changes. I would be real concerned about dehydration. Maybe you could call the vet with some questions about that. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Hang in there.

MamaCat
03-30-2008, 10:15
First off, I am very sorry, this is very hard and I will definitely keep you in my thoughts. I went through this with a kitty of mine last year. The vet said, remember this is a final act of good will to make sure that there is not a painful end. The only way you can make that decision is either when you think she is starving or just in too much pain or her body just gives out and she can't get up. There is no good answer.

Ashman
03-30-2008, 10:20
Thanks for your replies. The tests they ran said she wasn't dehydrated. They gave her some fluids subcontaneously yesterday, today, I can't even get he to pick her head up or even lick me, something she always does. We didn't see our regular vet yesterday, we are going to see our guy tomorrow

tazie
03-30-2008, 10:22
:(Ashman, so sorry to hear this. She sounds like she has had a great life up to this point, and you were all fortunate to have each other. I can't imagine what you are dealing with now, please know my thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Good luck with your decision.

Two Speed
03-30-2008, 10:25
We didn't see our regular vet yesterday, we are going to see our guy tomorrowThat'll be decision time. In the mean time I'd try to do something special for her if you can.

Good luck. You and your pup are in my thoughts, too.

dixicritter
03-30-2008, 10:54
Ashman, so sorry to hear about your sick dog. You and your girl will be in my thoughts. I know if this were our 15 yr old Shepard mix who is in much the same condition it would be a tough decision for me too. She's been my baby since she was 8 weeks old.

Feral Bill
03-30-2008, 11:01
We waited too long with our previous dog, causing needless suffering. The hardest part of owning a dog is our having to male this decision when they can't. Sounds like its time.

My heart aches for you.

Feral Bill

CrumbSnatcher
03-30-2008, 11:06
I know this isn't about hiking with a dog per se but I know many of you have had to make the hard call when your four legged hiking partner has come to the end of the trail. I have a 12 year old golden retriever. She is by far the best dog I have ever had. Both my kids learned to walk on her literally. Well she is an old girl who has started to slow down. She has developed several (over 10) bumps or masses through out her body that are detectable by touch. She has a huge tumor on her ear. She has been like this for the past year and aside from some soreness after alot of exercise she has been fine. Friday she started throwing up what looks like white foamy phlem. She hasn't eaten since then (her choice) and every time she takes in water she pukes again. Yesterday we took her to an emergency clinic, they ran some blood tests and and xray and couldn't really find anything wrong. The vet said she palpated and discovered a mass in her abdomen but wasn't sure what it was. Our regular vet said there was no way to know what what the bumps were without a biopsy. At $75 a pop that didn't seem wise, if they did come back as cancer I don't see putting a dog that old through surgery. She got some medicene at the vet and was in better spirits last night but that has worn off, and the stuff they sent us home with isn't helping her. She is still puking her breathing is real short shallow. I dont want her to suffer but I don't want to put her down if she can pull through this. Man, how do you make this call?
my heart goes out to you and your bestfriend.my hiking partnet of over 6,000 A.T. miles is 14. she still hanging in there.i think she still here because she knows i need her more than she needs me. its hard seeing them get older and weaker. but hang in there and spend as much time with her as you can. hopefully she got into something she shouldn't of and she'll recover. dont rush into anything

Old Hillwalker
03-30-2008, 11:20
Boy do I feel your pain. My remaining Yellow Lab, Fozzie Bear turned fourteen last November. He is hanging on like a trooper, but is now stone deaf, his sciatic nerves are just about pinched off by calcium growth in his vertabrae so his hind legs just shuffle like an old man's and he falls at times. With this shutting down of those spinal nerve bundles, he can't tell when he has to poop now, so it has become a race to get outside before he drops big brown eggs across the living room floor. He has about a 50% success rate on this. He's clearly embarassed by this when he comes back inside the house with his head hanging low. He gets a hug and a pat on the head anyway. I never expected him to last through the winter, but he is hanging in there. I'm scheduled to start a SOBO thru on June 23rd, but won't as long as he is still with me. I've decided after a long soul search that I won't have him put down just to keep my schedule. So far he doesn't seem to be suffering. Once that becomes apparent I will take him to his Vet and have grim reaper injection administered as I hold him in my arms. Then get really drunk....on a good single malt while sitting on his dog bed.

Go find the book "Merle's Door", read it, and I think it will help. However, be prepared to finish the book while shedding lots of tears.

Lilred
03-30-2008, 11:52
We just put our 15yo minpin down last weekend. It was very hard indeed. My heart goes out to you.

warraghiyagey
03-30-2008, 11:57
Ash, I have no answer for you. But I do understand your love for your friend. Praying that however it has to be, you'll be OK, and I believe she understands your love and the life you shared with her as such.
Peace to you and your pup.:sun:sun

CrumbSnatcher
03-30-2008, 12:02
Boy do I feel your pain. My remaining Yellow Lab, Fozzie Bear turned fourteen last November. He is hanging on like a trooper, but is now stone deaf, his sciatic nerves are just about pinched off by calcium growth in his vertabrae so his hind legs just shuffle like an old man's and he falls at times. With this shutting down of those spinal nerve bundles, he can't tell when he has to poop now, so it has become a race to get outside before he drops big brown eggs across the living room floor. He has about a 50% success rate on this. He's clearly embarassed by this when he comes back inside the house with his head hanging low. He gets a hug and a pat on the head anyway. I never expected him to last through the winter, but he is hanging in there. I'm scheduled to start a SOBO thru on June 23rd, but won't as long as he is still with me. I've decided after a long soul search that I won't have him put down just to keep my schedule. So far he doesn't seem to be suffering. Once that becomes apparent I will take him to his Vet and have grim reaper injection administered as I hold him in my arms. Then get really drunk....on a good single malt while sitting on his dog bed.

Go find the book "Merle's Door", read it, and I think it will help. However, be prepared to finish the book while shedding lots of tears.
its good to hear someone else say what i always say. to hell with the hiking schedule. my hiking has slowed way down once my bestfriend retired.people ask why not hike the p.c.t. i'll tell you why,because i wouldn't think of leaving my best friend behind.she has trouble standing once in awhile lost her hearing in her right ear,so shes startled quite often. she peas on herself a little bit. they do seem a little ashamed but your so right just hug them and hug them some more. it'll be a sad day when my bear(friend)leaves me. just have to remember you gave your dog the best life it could of possible wanted and needed.

Ashman
03-31-2008, 09:41
Thanks again for all your advice and well wishes. She gave us her last act of love and took the decision from us. She died last night. We woke up and she was gone. I am thankful she isn't suffering anymore, that a VERY hard decision did not have to made, and that my kids got a chance to say goodbye. A bittersweet sad day but a joyful as we remember the wonderful times she brought to our family.

peanuts
03-31-2008, 09:45
my deepest sympathies for you and your family. she is up in the "rainbow bridge" with all our beloved companions..

hugs to all of you

Wedge1173
03-31-2008, 09:55
Sorry to hear of your loss. She sounds like a great friend.

CrumbSnatcher
03-31-2008, 10:06
i'm very sorry for your loss,i'm sure you gave your best friend all the love and caring she ever needed or wanted an then some. i like to believe the saying "all dogs go to heaven.

Two Speed
03-31-2008, 10:09
I think they do.

Please accept my condolences, Ashman.

Thoughtful Owl
03-31-2008, 10:09
Ashman, I am truely sorry for your loss. I was very fortunate in that when I had to make the decision to put my 4 legged loved one down, a very good friend offered to take him to the vet for me and then he helped me bury him. I am glad you didn't have to make that decision and hope you have a friend to help you lay your old girl to rest.

TO

dixicritter
03-31-2008, 11:04
Ashman, truly sorry for your loss.

cowboy nichols
03-31-2008, 11:09
My deepestcondolences to you and your family. Cowboy

leeki pole
03-31-2008, 11:34
And I'll add my condolances as well. It's never easy. Hang in there and remember the good times.

Lilred
03-31-2008, 11:36
Sorry for your loss Ashman. I know how you feel.....

Old Hillwalker
03-31-2008, 11:37
Mark Twain was attributed to say: "If there are no dogs in heaven, then I want to go where dogs go".

And, yes there are Furry Faced Angels.......

Thru Hiker Wife
03-31-2008, 11:42
Ashman, my heart breaks for you and your family. I'm so sorry!

Savor the good times and when things get rough, remember you got an extra special furry angel looking out for you and yours.

Lyle
03-31-2008, 13:58
I understand you loss. Reading this thread has prompted me to give some extra loving to my own four-legged friends. Sometimes we take them for granted, but they always forgive us, that's why they are so special.

Wishing comfort for you and your family.

MamaCat
03-31-2008, 15:00
My deepest, heart-felt sympathy. Losing a furry friend is one of the hardest things that has ever happened to me. I hope you find peace soon. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

Jaybird62
03-31-2008, 15:17
i agree, all dogs go to heaven, and my heart goes out to you and your family....

d'shadow
03-31-2008, 16:17
I worked for a vet, and would recommend you consult with he/she on the best time to 'let go." Your family vet will give you the best recommedation to avoid needless suffering on the part of your beloved pet. I was often on hand when the families would bring in their pets, and the owner often craddled the pet in her arms as the shot was administered. We all shared tears of sorrow together. I'm so sorry you are at this point, however, think of all the happy years you have had with this dog. Hard to write as I'm tearing up right now. lost a good friend and companion in a large black cat a few years ago. Still miss him very much.

Nomad94
03-31-2008, 17:03
Sorry to hear of your loss.

berninbush
03-31-2008, 19:22
She gave us her last act of love and took the decision from us. She died last night. We woke up and she was gone.

That is indeed a gift, when you don't have to make that decision. You can reach a point where you're praying for their suffering to end without you having to be the one to do it.

I'm so sorry for the loss of your faithful friend. Folks who've never loved a dog that much may find it hard to understand, but they are indeed family. I didn't used to think animals could go to heaven, but when my beloved Annie died last year I halfway changed my mind. I think God knows a good thing when He sees it.

Quoddy
04-01-2008, 09:23
Those of us who are lucky enough to have shared the love of a dog or several dogs usually view our lives in sections that are directly related to that particular dog. My last dog was instrumental, in his way, toward helping me make some major changes in my life. My present dog is one that almost demands my love and seems to make sure that I get lots of daily exercise. Each is special in their own way, but all have that special ability to love and become part of our lives.

musicwoman
04-01-2008, 11:49
My deepest condolences to you and your family.

Rouen
04-01-2008, 19:55
She gave us her last act of love and took the decision from us. She died last night. We woke up and she was gone...

sorry for your loss Ashman, the relief that she's no long suffering and knowing she went on her own should help comfort you a little bit.

Jimmers
04-01-2008, 20:06
I'm so sorry for your loss Ashman, I know how hard it is to lose such a close friend as a dog. I felt so bad when I had to put down my 15 year old German Sheppard that I swore I'd never get another dog; it just hurt too much. Then my niece talked me into adopting my current dog. Best decision I ever made.

Life is just better with a dog around.

Mini-Mosey
04-02-2008, 04:46
Wow, Ashman, you and your family are in my thoughts. My heart is right there with you.

warraghiyagey
04-02-2008, 04:50
Thanks again for all your advice and well wishes. She gave us her last act of love and took the decision from us. She died last night. We woke up and she was gone. I am thankful she isn't suffering anymore, that a VERY hard decision did not have to made, and that my kids got a chance to say goodbye. A bittersweet sad day but a joyful as we remember the wonderful times she brought to our family.

Ash.
Damn it.
I'm sorry

Ashman
04-02-2008, 08:00
Some folks asked me to post some pics of my girl. Here is her great smile:

http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/files/1/3/9/3/2/mollysmile_thumb.jpg (http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=23553&c=member&imageuser=13932)

Here we are resting in front of Tory's Den in Hanging Rock State Park, NC at our last camping trip together:

http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/files/1/3/9/3/2/toryden_thumb.jpg (http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=23554&c=member&imageuser=13932)

Here she is cooling off on the trail on the same trip

http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/files/1/3/9/3/2/collmolly_thumb.jpg (http://whiteblaze.net/forum/vbg/showimage.php?i=23552&c=member&imageuser=13932)

Autumnwind
04-02-2008, 08:40
She is a beautiful girl. Remember she waits for you in heaven over Rainbows Bridge. She looks like she was a happy hiker too. She willl always be with you right by your side. Remember the good times and time to train another to continue her hiking experiences with you. She would want you to find another sweet friend for your family. She had a good long happy life with you. I believe 12 is 80 years old in dog years. Remember her always.......Keep on hiking.....Hugs to you and your family...

Ashman
04-02-2008, 08:43
I believe 12 is 80 years old in dog years. Remember her always.......Keep on hiking.....Hugs to you and your family...

Actually our vet said that due to her size it was closer to 93! She was a great dog, thanks to you and everyone else for their kind words.

CrumbSnatcher
04-02-2008, 09:37
She is a beautiful girl. Remember she waits for you in heaven over Rainbows Bridge. She looks like she was a happy hiker too. She willl always be with you right by your side. Remember the good times and time to train another to continue her hiking experiences with you. She would want you to find another sweet friend for your family. She had a good long happy life with you. I believe 12 is 80 years old in dog years. Remember her always.......Keep on hiking.....Hugs to you and your family...
i always thought it was 7 years to one human year,but the vet told me it also depends on the weight and size of the dog.

-SEEKER-
04-02-2008, 15:00
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I am in tears as I read this while my 10 year old girl sits and stares at me. I must go give her some loving. My thoughts are with you.

wrongway_08
04-02-2008, 16:17
Sorry to hear of your loss, went through the same symptoms with Cody last year, (cancer in his case).

Going through photos and remebering all the good times helps, besides they never leave you :) , they are always around.

doggiebag
04-02-2008, 17:02
I am sorry for your loss. Be comforted in the joys that you have experienced with your dog. We all know that our companions grow old and ... - which makes the present so precious. I am glad you provided a great life for your dog. Regards.

Heater
04-02-2008, 17:16
My boy (Hoser) was a large dog. German Shepherd that lived a long life too.
He died 7 years ago but due to my 12 hour working days and single status now, I can't have another animal friend until one of those two things change. :(

I sure want another dog though. You are lucky if you are in the position to adopt another into your life.