View Full Version : Here, this is a gift for backpacking ...
theinfamousj
03-08-2009, 20:23
At some point, we've all had someone give us a well intentioned gift for backpacking that ended up being amusing, to say the least. What are some gifts that folks have given you for your backpacking where the gift was just "all wrong"?
Example: Mom gave me a paper lunch sack filled with twigs so that I'd have some kindling. Not to be outdone, Dad bought me waders for stream crossings.
I was given one of those 6 pound pop up chairs.
Actually I think I got two, just in case I bumped into a friend I suppose.
A Glock entrenching tool.
Part of me thinks it could come in handy someday.
garlic08
03-08-2009, 20:56
One of those hand crank radio/flashlight/emergency flashing beacon things. Horrible thing.
modiyooch
03-08-2009, 21:33
1981 a police billy club for my protection from my brother the cop
recently, a bear bell from a concerned friend
shelterbuilder
03-08-2009, 21:46
Back in the mid-70's, when I was MUCH younger and stronger, and very new to backpacking, my Mom bought me a Bernzomatic "backpacking" stove and lantern. Heavy as the dickens, and not very good in winter (they ran on pure butane)...but she meant well, God bless her!:)
catfishrivers
03-08-2009, 21:53
I was given rather weighty survival rations brick as an xmas gift intended to bring along on my upcoming thru hike as emergency "backup"...I swear the there's gurth to that thing. I could see it being a weapon in the game Clue.
Ox97GaMe
03-09-2009, 00:16
On my thru hike, I got one care package from my parents.
I am in a small town in Vermont, which I had picked out from the data book as a mail stop before I started hiking. This town consisted of a general store, a gas station, and a post office; all in the same building. To say the least... it was a very small town in the middle of nowhere.
I get to town and the postmaster is happy to see me and hands me a medium size box. I open it to find a very nice note that says...... 'Was reading a story about the Appalachain Trail and that candy bars become a staple of a hiker's diet. Hope you enjoy the snacks. Love, Mom'.
In the box is not one, not two, but 10 - 6 packs of King size snickers bars. 120+ ounces of candy bars.
There were a lot of happy hikers on the trail that day. :)
When I was a teenager (30+ years ago) , a family member bought me a used (two burner) Coleman camp stove that they had found at a rummage sale or auction. They said they bought it for me to use when I went camping and hiking. They meant well.
Those old Coleman stoves were made out of a pretty heavy steel--and they burned a fairly large amount of fuel. That stove was much better suited to car camping than backpacking. I THINK that it was a version of the Coleman 413 series of camp stoves.
Mrs Baggins
03-09-2009, 05:24
I mentioned wanting to try to do some sketching while hiking so my daughter's (now ex) boyfriend gave me a thick heavy professional style spiral bound sketch pad, a whole package of sketch pencils and a package of erasers. I tore some of the pages out of the book and took one pencil and one eraser. Never used them.
Jayboflavin04
03-09-2009, 09:44
One of those hand crank radio/flashlight/emergency flashing beacon things. Horrible thing.
Are we brothers!!!! My mom got ethan and i one of those for christmas. Ethan loves the siren sound that thing makes.
flemdawg1
03-09-2009, 09:48
A 6lb 30deg SwissGear sleeping bag.
4eyedbuzzard
03-09-2009, 09:52
I was given rather weighty survival rations brick as an xmas gift intended to bring along on my upcoming thru hike as emergency "backup"...I swear the there's gurth to that thing. I could see it being a weapon in the game Clue.
It was Sgt. Rock, in the shelter, with the MRE's! (sorry Sarge;))
Clue-the AT edition. An idea whose time has come.
Waterfall
03-09-2009, 10:01
When I was 12, I asked for a tent. My parents went to Pier 1 and got me some mosquito netting to hang over my bed. In my bedroom. In my house. Inside.
squirrel bait
03-09-2009, 10:31
I was given by a friend a Pelican Heads UP Lite Model 2600 headlamp with strap. You know for hiking at night or around the camp site he said. Thanks I replied, right on the outer housing it states, "submersible to 500 feet". It runs on four double A's.:eek:
Bare Bear
03-09-2009, 12:16
I got a stainless steel flask with the Tampa Bay Buccanneers LOGO on it and my name engraved! I did not bother weighing it.
wcgornto
03-09-2009, 13:33
Rick Steves pack towel with its own mesh pouch
Portable saw
Heavy hard back book titled "How to Survive in the Wilderness"
Twist handled tooth brush for dispensing toothpaste
my husband bought me cooking utensils that folded in half. a 1 lb flash light that clipped to your belt that had a revolving light socket. a strobe function and a flashing function, a extra large thermarest pad (I'm 5'2"), And a device so I can pee standing up! He means well, but now I tell him want I want or need.
wrongway_08
03-09-2009, 14:42
Heavy hard back book titled "How to Survive in the Wilderness"
Got the same one, mine had the waterproof cover to it - a thick, grippy coating of flexible rubber all over it. It was about 10" x 6" across. Large book.
boarstone
03-09-2009, 15:36
Gosh...I'm feeling left out. Nobody buys me anything! (thank god!)
Oh..wait..Christmas..my daughter did get me a new cook pot. Of course I had to run right out and get the old one and my scales and weigh it the next chance I got. It's the same weight so I'll use it. Plus it's non-stick...I hope,...I see a trip coming up very soon...testing, testing...............
BobTheBuilder
03-09-2009, 15:59
Light-weight binoculars (about 3 lbs), outdated GPS with no maps loaded, and my favorite, a "travel" coffee press, about 5 lbs worth.
I always feel like I owe them pictures of me enjoying their item, but I can't tote all that weight.
I received an 6.5 pound tent. The box said "light weight tent".
The best gift I did not receive was a Coleman cooler with wheels. My sister has one and thought it would be good since I could just roll it up the trail.
When I just got started backpacking I bought myself lots of stuff I would never consider carrying these days. Lets just say that my pack was about 50 pounds the first time I hiked on the AT. 7 pound pack, 4 canisters of fuel, 8 pound tent, 2 pound sleeping pad, 3 jackets and the list goes on. 5 days 40 miles later I was ready to quit. It was a great hike, but my pack weight was about 25 pounds the next time I backpacked. Sad part is that the light weight stuff cost less than the heavy stuff.
A Glock entrenching tool.
Part of me thinks it could come in handy someday.
I've heard those are good at fending off zombies...
My dad gave me a Rambo-style survival knife. Stainless steel handle, lid on handle unscrews to hold waterproof matches... or maybe maps! Fourteen inches from blade tip to the butt of the handle. 20.6 oz.
drastic_quench
03-09-2009, 18:02
A 6lb 30deg SwissGear sleeping bag.
SwissGear is crap, and it reminds me of my own story. My folks bought me a SwissGear tent "for hiking". Long, heavy, and (get this) no rainfly! It was the quality of tent you'd set up in the backyard for little kids to camp out when in July. They tried, I guess.
He means well, but now I tell him want I want or need.
I second that emotion!
This past Christmas season, I went to the internet and found the EXACT items that I was wanting or needing--including the desired color, size, model numbers etc. I then printed out those web pages (with the website addresses also printed on them for easy reference).
I then gave the stack of papers to my wife and I told her that if she (or family members) were looking for ideas of what to get me for Christmas here was the place to start. I felt just like a little kid giving my Christmas "wish list" to "Santa"!
The good news? I received many of the items that I had suggested--all in the right size, shape and color. I didn't have to return a single item or pretend that I liked something that I really did not like. My wife also commented upon how easy it was to shop for me this year. (I had given her enough ideas that she felt that she had plenty of options and I still had no clue as to what I was getting for Christmas. So the "surprise factor" was still there).
We decided that our family would be following this practice for MANY years to come!
Sleepy the Arab
03-09-2009, 23:12
My sister...bless her...last Christmas bought me a walking stick. She means well, but really she should know me (and my numerous quirks) by now to know that I would never change my hiking style to the degree that would make me comfortable with this staff. I'm 6'1" and this stands as high as my shoulders. It really is a nice staff; the part my hand would grip is wrapped in leather and it's nicely varnished, but it must weigh six pounds and is as thick around as a salami. Not only could I fight off the errant cougar that decides to attack me, but in a pinch I could also derail an oncoming train.
The worst part is I feel obligated to use this, otherwise she'll be hurt in a way that would make me feel really terrible. Just looking at it and thinking about lifting it up and down...and up and down....as I hike up a mountain exhausts me. Man, I'm going to have to take this on a hike next summer. What the heck am I going to do?
Powder River
03-09-2009, 23:30
My sister...bless her...last Christmas bought me a walking stick. She means well, but really she should know me (and my numerous quirks) by now to know that I would never change my hiking style to the degree that would make me comfortable with this staff. I'm 6'1" and this stands as high as my shoulders. It really is a nice staff; the part my hand would grip is wrapped in leather and it's nicely varnished, but it must weigh six pounds and is as thick around as a salami. Not only could I fight off the errant cougar that decides to attack me, but in a pinch I could also derail an oncoming train.
The worst part is I feel obligated to use this, otherwise she'll be hurt in a way that would make me feel really terrible. Just looking at it and thinking about lifting it up and down...and up and down....as I hike up a mountain exhausts me. Man, I'm going to have to take this on a hike next summer. What the heck am I going to do?
You should take her with her on a hike and "let" her use the staff! :D:D
The worst part is I feel obligated to use this, otherwise she'll be hurt in a way that would make me feel really terrible. Just looking at it and thinking about lifting it up and down...and up and down....as I hike up a mountain exhausts me. Man, I'm going to have to take this on a hike next summer. What the heck am I going to do?
Take the heavy hiking staff with you on one short trip. Take numerous pictures of you with the staff in different locations (and with you wearing different sets of clothes). Also take some pictures with the staff leaning up against things without you being in the picture. Then, you can leave the staff home in a "place of honor" where she is bound to see it if she ever visits you.
Every so often, let your sister happen to see ONE "new" picture from that original set of photos. If it is mixed in with a group of photos from your most current trip--she will simply assume that you are still using the staff! Who knows how long you can successfully use the pictures from that one little trip. :-?
ColdFire
03-10-2009, 01:55
Tell her it's just way to nice to use and mount it on your wall like a trophy, Or you can get some extended drill bits and hollow it out as much as you can. :sun
My sister...bless her...last Christmas bought me a walking stick. She means well, but really she should know me (and my numerous quirks) by now to know that I would never change my hiking style to the degree that would make me comfortable with this staff. I'm 6'1" and this stands as high as my shoulders. It really is a nice staff; the part my hand would grip is wrapped in leather and it's nicely varnished, but it must weigh six pounds and is as thick around as a salami. Not only could I fight off the errant cougar that decides to attack me, but in a pinch I could also derail an oncoming train.
The worst part is I feel obligated to use this, otherwise she'll be hurt in a way that would make me feel really terrible. Just looking at it and thinking about lifting it up and down...and up and down....as I hike up a mountain exhausts me. Man, I'm going to have to take this on a hike next summer. What the heck am I going to do?
Take it with you, and change your trail name to Gandalf.:rolleyes:
This past weekend we shared a shelter in the Smokies with a couple of female active-duty Marines. They're out on a hiking holiday, getting ready for the Bataan marathon hike.
Their friends, family, and co-workers were very concerned for their safety. When they firmly nixxed carrying any guns on the hike, their friends offered to loan them knives. One of the girls came back from her last day at work with an armload of eight or so knives that they boys thought might come in handy. Those all got left at home.
They had settled for their own personal K-bars, and a machete with a saw-blade along the back. Fortunately, although they had been lugging the machete along the Trail, young, male hikers were willing to do the actual sawing.
My sister...bless her...last Christmas bought me a walking stick. She means well, but really she should know me (and my numerous quirks) by now to know that I would never change my hiking style to the degree that would make me comfortable with this staff. I'm 6'1" and this stands as high as my shoulders. It really is a nice staff; the part my hand would grip is wrapped in leather and it's nicely varnished, but it must weigh six pounds and is as thick around as a salami. Not only could I fight off the errant cougar that decides to attack me, but in a pinch I could also derail an oncoming train.
The worst part is I feel obligated to use this, otherwise she'll be hurt in a way that would make me feel really terrible. Just looking at it and thinking about lifting it up and down...and up and down....as I hike up a mountain exhausts me. Man, I'm going to have to take this on a hike next summer. What the heck am I going to do?
Same thing happened to me. It now stands in a corner (never used) with decals and other souveneirs collected over the years from places and trails that I have hiked. Try it it'll work!
MintakaCat
03-10-2009, 08:49
When I was first in Boy Scouts I got a real heavy army surplus canvas pup tent and a sterno stove complete with an iron skillet.
flemdawg1
03-10-2009, 10:03
Same thing happened to me. It now stands in a corner (never used) with decals and other souveneirs collected over the years from places and trails that I have hiked. Try it it'll work!
I was going to suggest this. Also you could put those lil' tin badge things on it.
http://www.moonstar.com/~pmicken/bst.jpg
flemdawg1
03-10-2009, 10:07
SwissGear is crap, and it reminds me of my own story. My folks bought me a SwissGear tent "for hiking". Long, heavy, and (get this) no rainfly! It was the quality of tent you'd set up in the backyard for little kids to camp out when in July. They tried, I guess.
I actually have last year's model from Sam's Club, its a very nice tent, very surprising considering it was only ~$55. It's a Hubba-hubba knockoff, but a very decent one.
Sleepy the Arab
03-10-2009, 22:18
You should take her with her on a hike and "let" her use the staff! :D:D
Boy, that idea would so not work. This is a girl who on her last hike (back in 1999 - inspired by my inaugural thru-hike), threw up hiking up the Imp. For the uninitiated, Imp profile is a knob about 1 mile downhill from the Carter range, and a whole 2.2 miles from route 16 (good views too - check it out if you have a few spare hours while in the Gorham area). This is quite possibly the easiest hike I can think of, as I had first done this when I was 3. There is no better example of how she is not cut out for hiking. In addition, there are a number of complaints I would hear after the first half mile:
"This is boring."
"My feet hurt."
"I want to go back down."
"How much farther."
"I'm hungry."
"This pack is heavy." (Jeez, I've got a half dozen in less than a minute.)
"Is it time for a break yet?"
There is no way I am willing to allow, "Boy this stick is heavy," to the list. Don't get me wrong; I love her to death, but she is not a hiker, and will not willingly become one. As for the stick, well, maybe I could get a little cart or attach wheels to it or something.
RockStar
03-11-2009, 01:13
Almost every I know tried to give me a crank flashlight. 2 succeeded with "NO NO, it's NO trouble. I INSIST!"
Also received these items:
-Hiker Safety nalgene(bright pink) with a first aid kit, whistle/match holder, carabiner etc.(youve seen them)
-aluminum pot/pan kit from walmart times 2.
-A knife that feels like a hand grenade and has a flashlight that swivels outof the back of it. Also you open the knife by pushing a button and the blade comes flying open. The blade is 4"at LEAST.
-waterproof matches(when you try to strike one the tip comes flying off)
-BEST THING EVER,except not for hiking: My mom bought me a rather expensive pair of bonoculars that took digital pictures. :eek: They weighed a god aweful amount and would only hold 12 pictures, not to mention the battery would die after about 2.
One of my daughters-in-law got me an under armor compression shirt. Now that's not something a 62 year old would wear, at least not this one. I put it on but not where anyone could see me. I quickly took it off and carried it back to the store and exchanged it.
I was shopping for shorts in Manchester Center, VT and this young female store clerk tried to show me a kilt. I quickly told her (very politely) that I wasn't interested in a kilt!!!
Happy hiking. :sun
BobTheBuilder
03-11-2009, 17:18
They all ring true. I'm thinking maybe I take some pictures of my well-intentioned gifts and photoshop them into real hiking pix. Maybe I could pay somebody to do it.
A candle lantern! It doesn't really do much but my grandmother got it for me and I feel like I have to use it :)
My middle daughter, bless her heart, gave me a signal mirror when she was about 8 years-old. - Picked it out and paid for it and wrapped it up herself...When I got it I was picturing myself lost on Mt. Washington or somewhere, signalling for help.