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Turtle Feet
12-12-2010, 02:32
when you tell them you're about to start a thru-hike of the AT?

I've got a theory here, but I'd like to hear responses from both men & women. Here's the reason I'm asking. At the grocery store yesterday, I ran into a casual friend who I haven't seen in several months. When she asked what I was up to, I told her that I was about to start a thru-hike, ect. The next question she asked was, "are you going with anyone?".

The first question everyone has - I mean everyone -is some version of "are you going alone"? "You aren't going alone, are you?", "Who are you going with?", and when I tell them that infact I am starting alone and look forward to meeting up with others that are hiking on their own they're pretty much agast.

So, I'm wondering if it's just a sexist thing; that if I were a man, the first question might be something along the lines of "how long will you be gone?", "where are you starting?", you know what I mean.

So guys, what's the first question you hear? Ladies, is it just me, or do you get the same reaction?????

turtle feet

wcgornto
12-12-2010, 02:38
It doesn't matter if you are a man or a woman. That is one of the first and most common questions. It usually comes just before "You are going to carry a gun, aren't you?"

khog03
12-12-2010, 02:56
Yep. Every single time. And it's not only in regards to hiking. I do many things by myself that I guess other people wouldn't and if I mention it people always ask "who are you going with?" I'm going skydiving for my bday at the end of the month and when I told my friends this was their first response. Really annoying to me. Are we supposed to be incapable of enjoying time to ourselves?

Des
12-12-2010, 03:55
Agreed; its the same irregardless of gender. Most people I know wouldn't even consider going on a solo hike in a state park. They are just too scared of the 'wilderness.' Somehow, I never saw a modern crime-ridden city as being any safer- in fact, I think its much more dangerous. Its just what you are familiar with, I guess.

I've never been asked whether I was taking a gun. I think that is more of where you are from rather than some gender divide.

RGB
12-12-2010, 04:32
Yeah usually the next question is "Are you going to be packing?" "You are carrying a gun, aren't you?" or a statement "You better carry a gun."

If we go by simple statistics here, then I should be dual-wielding AKs with bandoleers strapped across my chest while walking around the city if you think it's necessary to be packing on the trail.

writeronthestorm
12-12-2010, 05:43
I'm with everyone else. The first question is "Are you going alone?"... After I say "yes' it's immediately followed by "Are you taking a gun?".

on_the_GOEZ
12-12-2010, 06:03
When people ask me if im "Going alone" i say yes, quickly followed by "but I will undoubtedly meet many people on the trail" So, even though I start alone does not mean I am alone. It took my mother a while to understand this.

As far as packing heat goes, only one persone has asked me this and i found it completely absurd. I wasnt sure if they were serious or not at first. Taking any kind of fire arm is rediculous and unnecessary. Your legs will get you farther than bullets.

gipcgirl
12-12-2010, 06:44
when you tell them you're about to start a thru-hike of the AT?

I've got a theory here, but I'd like to hear responses from both men & women. Here's the reason I'm asking. At the grocery store yesterday, I ran into a casual friend who I haven't seen in several months. When she asked what I was up to, I told her that I was about to start a thru-hike, ect. The next question she asked was, "are you going with anyone?".

The first question everyone has - I mean everyone -is some version of "are you going alone"? "You aren't going alone, are you?", "Who are you going with?", and when I tell them that infact I am starting alone and look forward to meeting up with others that are hiking on their own they're pretty much agast.

So, I'm wondering if it's just a sexist thing; that if I were a man, the first question might be something along the lines of "how long will you be gone?", "where are you starting?", you know what I mean.

So guys, what's the first question you hear? Ladies, is it just me, or do you get the same reaction?????

turtle feet
If I got a $ for the number of times people were amazed, horrified that I had travelled from Australia to America alone and for the sole purpose of walking the AT alone I would be a wealthy woman. The next questions were are you scared? and where do you sleep?

Amberalicia
12-12-2010, 06:48
I haven't been asked the gun question. But some ask whether I'm carrying my own tent and equipment. Or, "Do you camp out in the woods at night?" Many though tell me they would love to go on extended hikes like the AT. You can see it in their eyes. Kind of nice.

2.0
12-12-2010, 07:39
In my case it depends on who I'm talkin
g with. Non-hikers usually ask the "alone" question, non-outdoorsy types ask "why" and people that know me well wish me luck and ask "what will you do afterwards". People that know me, know what I have been dealing with for the last 5 years(caregiver for my father) and understand my need for freedom again.

More importantly to myself are the questions I ask myself, since I have never put much stock into what others think of me. I have always had a strong independent streak and been very self reliant and enjoy doing many things on my own. Of course there are some advantages of having company and sharing experiences with.

garlic08
12-12-2010, 08:25
Ditto here on the gun question, and where I live it's often the first question. In some towns out West here, it's not whether you're carrying a gun or not, it's "What kind of gun are you carrying?"

At the risk of deflecting this good thread, I've heard a theory that your pack reflects your fears. Those who pack guns must be afraid of different things than I'm afraid of. And that's OK.

A less common question is "Are you carrying all your food?" I like that one. I also like Bill Bryson's response, "Yes, until I can find someone to carry it for me."

Blue Jay
12-12-2010, 10:21
It's actually quite simple why people always ask this question. The vast majority of humans cannot stand their own company.:eek:

Spokes
12-12-2010, 10:50
Yep, got a lot of "are you going alone" questions too. It wasn't solely associated with AT thru hiking either. When I rode my bicycle cross country in 2008 lots of people asked the same thing. Amazing.

Carbo
12-12-2010, 10:51
It's actually quite simple why people always ask this question. The vast majority of humans cannot stand their own company.:eek:

HAHAHA!! Good one to start the day!

V Eight
12-12-2010, 12:35
Ditto here on the gun question, and where I live it's often the first question. In some towns out West here, it's not whether you're carrying a gun or not, it's "What kind of gun are you carrying?"

#1 question from men, "what kind of gun I'm taking"
from women, "alone?"

#2 Aren't you afraid of the Bears?

It really is quite amusing to see the look on their face's when I flatly say no to either of these.

Most of the people I know or work with, have been so completely suburbanized,
that the thought of actually being in the woods for any reason is just not part of their world.:rolleyes:

walkin' wally
12-12-2010, 12:58
Most frequently asked... :eek: Are you going alone?:eek:

Next.. How far are you going?

Storm
12-12-2010, 13:19
One of the first question I get is "Why?" I tell them if I have to explain they wouldn't understand anyway.

Deadeye
12-12-2010, 13:43
Looks like we all hear the same:

"ALONE!?!'
"Where do you sleep/eat/bathe/poop?"
"Do you bring a gun/phone/GPS?"
"Why?"
"Can I come, too?"

BrianLe
12-12-2010, 13:46
I think it depends in part on the context in which people "find out". Sometimes it's just a conversation killer; folks don't relate to the idea well enough to say much. Perhaps in some cases they don't believe, or just don't absorb/process what it is that's being said.

At any rate, in the majority of cases there simply is no "first question". In part because I'm a repeat offender (some people now foolishly assume that I know what I'm doing :-)).

Carbo
12-12-2010, 13:49
...#2 Aren't you afraid of the Bears?



Usually the same #2 question here in NJ. Alone? is #1.

My answer to the bear question is, "No, I'm more afraid of rattlers and hypothermia." Most just shake their head and follow-up with an "Are you nuts?" question or something similar.

4eyedbuzzard
12-12-2010, 14:00
Looks like we all hear the same:

"ALONE!?!'
"Where do you sleep/eat/bathe/poop?"
"Do you bring a gun/phone/GPS?"
"Why?"
"Can I come, too?"

Amazingly, even many of my friends who hunt and fish and fancy themselves "outdoorsmen" ask many of these questions about my short section hikes (I'm not thru-hiking). Especially the questions on guns and GPS's. Some state the dangers of bears and other wildlife and getting lost. FWIW, and not to PO anyone or start a debate, I do carry, but do so almost all of the time anyway - but certainly not because of danger from bears. A gun is definitely not necessary. It further amazes me that so many of these guys are so reliant (over-reliant IMO) on GPS, which while I might consider carrying as a navigation convenience, I would never trust as my only navigation method - that map and compass stuff remains pretty foolproof. Ask many of these guys to go on a hike and I guaranty many would show up with a 60 lb pack with saws, hatchets, 8" knives and all sorts of other interesting gear.

DrRichardCranium
12-12-2010, 14:04
I am a man and I heard the same thing. I wonder how people could be so disconnected. Sure, bad things could happen out on the trail. But I walk through cities and towns unarmed and often alone and it is considered perfectly normal and acceptable.

writeronthestorm
12-12-2010, 14:16
... When I backpack anywhere in WA, ID, MT... I always carry bear spray. Thats usually what I tell people if they ask me about a gun when I'm hiking in the north west. It does make a lot of sense to carry bear spray up here. Every year hikers/campers are killed by grizzly attacks.

Sensei
12-12-2010, 14:21
Most common first question: Are you going alone?

Second most common: What are you going to eat? :D

I rarely get asked why I'm doing the trail. The people that know me probably figure that my answer won't make sense to them anyway.

Sensei
12-12-2010, 14:24
... When I backpack anywhere in WA, ID, MT... I always carry bear spray. Thats usually what I tell people if they ask me about a gun when I'm hiking in the north west. It does make a lot of sense to carry bear spray up here. Every year hikers/campers are killed by grizzly attacks.

I hear you, writer. If the AT were in grizzly country I'd carry bear spray, too.

Dogwood
12-12-2010, 15:34
Got a gun? Aren't you afraid? FEAR!!! FEAR!!! FEAR!!!

It reeks! It's a stench in my nostrils!

Makes me wonder what the source is of the info all these folks are allowing themselves to be programed with!

Roland
12-12-2010, 15:36
Got a gun? Aren't you afraid? FEAR!!! FEAR!!! FEAR!!!

It reeks! It's a stench in my nostrils!

Makes me wonder what the source is of the info all these folks are allowing themselves to be programed with!

Fear of the unknown. It's human nature.

Dogwood
12-12-2010, 15:48
Faith, trust, knowledge, and wisdom are human nature too!

Rocket Jones
12-12-2010, 15:49
Faith, trust, knowledge, and wisdom are human nature too!
Nonsense. Those are learned behaviors.

Roland
12-12-2010, 15:50
Faith, trust, knowledge, and wisdom are human nature too!

Yes, but they must be learned and earned.

As people learn more about hiking and the AT, their fears slowly melt away.

Dogwood
12-12-2010, 15:56
So, if I understand you right, fear is natural or human nature but faith, trust, knowledge, and wisdom are learned behaviors? How are knowledge and wisdom behaviors? Faith is a learned behavior? I'm not getting that.

I notice the smallest of children who trust but later learn to FEAR the exact same thing because THAT is what is taught to them by adults.

RGB
12-12-2010, 16:03
A lot of the people that think we're nuts just have spacial issues. Most humans do. Man lives outdoors, but man thinks he's above that, so he puts up walls to trap some space for himself. Lives there for a few thousands years. If he's forced out somehow, then he's scared ****less of the space without walls. No definition. Anything can happen.

Maybe I've just been doing it for so long, but I'm always baffled by the "what will you eat" and "where will you sleep" questions. I mean, isn't it kind of obvious? I guess only to me and other hikers.

Carbo
12-12-2010, 16:10
Actually we should be sleeping up on a tree branch where it is safe from the creepy crawlers. Then we can use our ativistic instinct where we have that sudden jolt to awakness, just when we're dozing off... so we don't fall out of the tree of course!

Rocket Jones
12-12-2010, 16:10
So, if I understand you right, fear is natural or human nature but faith, trust, knowledge, and wisdom are learned behaviors? How are knowledge and wisdom behaviors? Faith is a learned behavior? I'm not getting that.

I notice the smallest of children who trust but later learn to FEAR the exact same thing because THAT is what is taught to them by adults.

Animals (humans belong to this group) are hard-wired to flee or fight in a strange situation.

Until you learn to have faith in something, you are continually surprised each time you are confronted with it. You have faith that water will come out of the spigot when you turn the tap. Until you learn that, it's a miracle each and every time. Eventually you learn to have faith that it will happen. You even learn to trust it. And if the water is cut off and turning on the tap doesn't bring water, then your trust is betrayed, but you may still have faith that it'll work next time.

I agree that children trust until they are taught to fear. Sometimes. But it doesn't have to be an adult. Another child may hit or bite unexpectedly or a behavior provokes a scolding or swat on the fanny. I don't recall ever seeing an adult telling a child specifically to be afraid of something. Be careful of, be aware of, yes (hot stove anyone?), but be afraid? Nope.

Lilred
12-12-2010, 16:31
I had read once and have heard many times that the only fear man is born with is the fear of falling. all other fears are learned. How anyone could know this, I don't know.

I am ALWAYS asked these three questions. Aren't you afraid, are you carrying a gun and are you going alone. Not necessarily in any order.

2.0
12-12-2010, 16:32
Humans are the only species on earth that is born without ANY instincts. We learn everything, including fear, faith, love, etc.

In my humble opinion, people that cannot leave their house, let alone go into the woods, without a gun, are taught that they need to be onguard all the time because someone or something will get them. Growing up, my family never had a gun. I never had one until I got into law enforcement. Even when I was in law enforcement I did not carry a gun unless I was on duty. Many co-workers carried them off duty cause they thought they were always on duty, even grocery shopping, and could not relax and enjoy their down time. Since I retired from the police dept I have never carried my gun and it still sits hidden deep in my closet, I think.:confused:

There is a time and place for them, I guess, but I don't fear anything(if it happens, it happens), so I have no need to carry one. I am more likely to be run over while crossing the street by a drunk driver than have a bad encounter with a bear, gangbanger or boogeyman. I won't tell anyone how to live their lives, but I like to enjoy mine. I like to relax and enjoy life rather than be afraid to die from every little that could hurt us. It doesn't mean I take stupid risks, but I don't dwell on anything negative.

Mountain_Goat
12-12-2010, 17:08
That's funny.Everyon asks me if i am packing any heat and when i say no they tell me i'm crazy for not.

ec.hiker
12-12-2010, 17:29
I have been asked by several people what the Appalacian Trail was!!! Very sad I know but it has happened more than once.


when you tell them you're about to start a thru-hike of the AT?

I've got a theory here, but I'd like to hear responses from both men & women. Here's the reason I'm asking. At the grocery store yesterday, I ran into a casual friend who I haven't seen in several months. When she asked what I was up to, I told her that I was about to start a thru-hike, ect. The next question she asked was, "are you going with anyone?".

The first question everyone has - I mean everyone -is some version of "are you going alone"? "You aren't going alone, are you?", "Who are you going with?", and when I tell them that infact I am starting alone and look forward to meeting up with others that are hiking on their own they're pretty much agast.

So, I'm wondering if it's just a sexist thing; that if I were a man, the first question might be something along the lines of "how long will you be gone?", "where are you starting?", you know what I mean.

So guys, what's the first question you hear? Ladies, is it just me, or do you get the same reaction?????

turtle feet

Tilly
12-12-2010, 17:58
I didn't tell anyone I was going. I just sent out emails when I got to the first trail town, and progressed from there.

I'm not trying to be cynical or condescending, but most people don't get LD hiking at all. So for the most part I don't bother discussing my hikes with people who aren't backpackers.

Plus I'm a fairly private person and I don't discuss myself & what I'm doing much at work, etc. Where I live now I only have 'work' friends. And my family thinks I'm crazy so I don't discuss w/them either.

Blissful
12-12-2010, 18:09
If anyone asks if I'm going alone , I tell them no. There are always hikers out on the AT so you are never alone.

Spokes
12-12-2010, 20:02
Yeah usually the next question is "Are you going to be packing?" "You are carrying a gun, aren't you?" or a statement "You better carry a gun." ......

I got this guestbook entry in my online journal last year:

"Ex-cop goes into a gun store. He tells the salesman he's going to walk the entire Appalachain Trail. He needs to know what kind of handgun he should carry in case he runs into a bear.

The salesman says, "Carry any handgun you want. But if you're going to shoot a bear with it, be sure to grind off the front sight."

The former cop looks perplexed. "Why should I grind off the front sight?"

"That way it won't hurt so bad when the bear takes it away and shoves it up your arse." said the salesman.

Too funny!

DLANOIE
12-12-2010, 20:20
On my thru in 2006 I was on the summit of Wildcat Mnt. in NH. A woman who was with her family there enjoying the day(they took the gondola up) asked me..."where do you get water?".:eek:

I to this day laugh about it.

sbhikes
12-12-2010, 20:24
Now that I've completed my hike, asking me if I hiked alone is still the first question and when I say yes, the second question is always "were you afraid?" The answer to that is, of course, no.

writeronthestorm
12-12-2010, 20:45
Originally posted by ec.hiker
I have been asked by several people what the Appalacian Trail was!!! Very sad I know but it has happened more than once.

I was in REI trying on packs Friday and the salesman who was helping me didn't know what the AT was... I was like "What the hell? Are you serious dude?"

stretche
12-12-2010, 20:57
For me especially with my grandmother, "you are not hiking alone are you?" and when i told my parents same reaction. At least from my friends the reaction is "are you crazy??"

SassyWindsor
12-12-2010, 21:10
Can I use..... "your car" while your're gone?"
"your cloths" "
"your flat" "

2.0
12-12-2010, 21:18
I was in REI trying on packs Friday and the salesman who was helping me didn't know what the AT was... I was like "What the hell? Are you serious dude?"

Now that there is funny!:banana I would have laughed out loud literally.

Suprised he knew what a pack was.

TheChop
12-12-2010, 21:48
Humans are the only species on earth that is born without ANY instincts. We learn everything, including fear, faith, love, etc.


Sorry I did not learn my reaction to Scarlett Johansson. That is entirely instinctual.

Spokes
12-12-2010, 22:26
I was in REI trying on packs Friday and the salesman who was helping me didn't know what the AT was... I was like "What the hell? Are you serious dude?"

Did you buy one there?

writeronthestorm
12-12-2010, 22:35
Originally Posted by Spokes
Did you buy one there?

No. The only pack they had in store that I was interested in was the Flash 50. What I really wanted to do was try on the GoLite Jam, but alas they didn't have any in the store. So I didn't buy anything. I just haven't made up mind about a pack yet.

Did buy the GoLite Shangri-La though. Pretty stoked to practice setting it up, but I still don't own trekking poles yet. Probably won't pick any up until after Christmas. Still have some gifts to buy.

Turtle Feet
12-13-2010, 00:20
OK, so that blows my theory all to hell, but I'm sort of relieved to know it's not just me, and it's not exclusive to women.

I also get the gun question (we live in the northwoods, hunting is taught in 1st grade), to each his own, but can't envision one single scenario where a gun would actually create a positive outcome.

I'm just stoked to know that I'm on the 90 day count-down, it brings tears to my eyes man!

tf

Sarcasm the elf
12-13-2010, 00:57
The first question everyone has - I mean everyone -is some version of "are you going alone"? "You aren't going alone, are you?", "Who are you going with?", and when I tell them that infact I am starting alone and look forward to meeting up with others that are hiking on their own they're pretty much agast.

So, I'm wondering if it's just a sexist thing; that if I were a man, the first question might be something along the lines of "how long will you be gone?", "where are you starting?", you know what I mean.


I suspect there is a sexist aspect to the question, but as a guy I also get this question almost every time I go on an overnight. My family was active in the boy scouts for years and the buddy system was the law of the land. Some habits never go away.


It doesn't matter if you are a man or a woman. That is one of the first and most common questions. It usually comes just before "You are going to carry a gun, aren't you?"

I don't always get asked the gun question, some of my more enlightened friends just ask if I carry pepper spray :p


It's actually quite simple why people always ask this question. The vast majority of humans cannot stand their own company.:eek:

So sad but so true Blue Jay, I found this out about myself when I started to do weekend solo trips. Maybe some day I'll make better company for myself.

Finally my favorite question/answer story isn't even my own: My buddy asked his boss if he could leave for an hour to go pick up some Aqua Mira. After asking what Aqua Mira was, his boss asked him how long he was backpacking for and how much water he was taking. He replied that we were going for 3 days/2 nights and carrying 3 liters of water each, his boss then replied incredulously "Well why do you need the Aqua Mira, isn't that enough water for the trip?"

Trailweaver
12-13-2010, 03:26
I'm almost always asked if I go alone. (I mostly do. . . the few times I've taken someone with me, it was someone who wanted to learn how to backpack.)

I also ran into the "do you do that alone" question when I did the Bicycle Ride Across GA (BRAG) ride. The answer to that was "No, about 1,500 people are going with me this year." The funniest question in relation to that trip was "Do they have someone take you and your bike up the hills in a truck or something?" Duh. . . !!! I sometimes think of that when I'm hiking up what seems like an endless uphill climb with that pack. I thought the bike uphill was tough!

I almost wish I could take photos of people's expressions when I do tell them I hike alone - it would make a great scrapbook!

garlic08
12-13-2010, 09:09
I like it when I mention the AT and someone says, "Oh yeah, I read that book!", meaning Bryson, of course.

I'm not surprised there are people out there whose world does not revolve around hiking trails. Especially out West, there are quite a few people who've never heard of the AT. I bet a lot couldn't point out the Appalachians on a map, and probably think they're in Europe somewhere.

I feel that way when the conversation turns to TV. I've missed the last 30 years when it comes to TV. I've never seen an episode of The Simpsons, Seinfeld, LA Law, CSI, a single reality TV show, Dancing with the Stars, American Idol, etc. I've never paid a cable bill. I'm clueless in that culture and simply tune it out, so to speak, so I understand when others are clueless in mine.

4eyedbuzzard
12-13-2010, 09:56
Can I use..... "your car" while your're gone?"
"your cloths" "
"your flat" "

Can I use... "Your girlfriend / boyfriend / hubby / wife / SO" :-? :eek:

Okay, just my dirty mind wandering. Not that something like that would actually ever happen - well, they probably wouldn't ask anyway :D

crazystick
12-14-2010, 01:12
I am not sure if its a woman thing or not. I know I am always asked that and im a man. but its never the first thing, its usually second or third.
usually im asked "how long" then "how do you carry everything" then "are you going alone" more or less.

Rocket Jones
12-14-2010, 07:45
I'm always asked "What's wrong with Matthewski?"

He's moving beyond legendary into mythical territory.

:D

cwinkle
12-14-2010, 13:38
Everyone's first question is "Are you going alone?" I say "yes, but I expect 1,200-1,500 people going the same direction as me over a six week window, I don't know how 'alone' I will be."

Second question "Are you taking a gun?" I just tell them I haven't decided and that it's illegal to have one in the Smoky's or SNP.

One old army guy friend insisted I bring a satellite phone with me and got kind of angry with me when I told him that was ridiculous.

Ogre
12-15-2010, 13:42
1) Are you going alone / Who are you going with / Is the wife going with you? By far the most common question, and always first.

2) What made you decide to do that (Which I guess is the same as "Why?" but I don't think anyone has literally asked "Why?" yet!) Almost always the second question.

3) Where will you sleep?

4) What will you eat?

No one's asked me about guns. Generally everyone's been really positive about it too, haven't had any "bad" reactions yet.

Spokes
12-15-2010, 13:44
I'm always asked "What's wrong with Matthewski?"

He's moving beyond legendary into mythical territory.

:D

Eat more bacon, and you'll be just like him.

Rocket Jones
12-15-2010, 19:32
Eat more bacon, and you'll be just like him.

Someone else told me that too. I'm trying vegetarianism. ;)

Sensei
12-15-2010, 20:12
My boss' first question was: "How are you going to make any money doing that?"

My boss' second question was: "If you're going to do something like that, why not do it somewhere out of the country? America is going to hell."

:)

beakerman
12-16-2010, 10:49
I get the "going alone" question even on a week long trip. My response is "well I was hoping you would come a long...." they usually stop asking silly questions like that for fear I might drag them with me. What a bunch of wimps.

Penn-J
12-16-2010, 13:18
I just stopped telling people what I was going to do before my thru-hike.
I got tired of trying to explain it to family and friends.
Trying to explain thru-hiking to non backpackers is like trying to explain the color purple to a blind person.