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mweinstone
01-31-2011, 14:01
thinking of writing a hiking book. whats my slant?

hikerboy57
01-31-2011, 14:41
doesnt matter, no one can put things into words quite like you., but please dont spell check, it would never be the same.

sbhikes
01-31-2011, 14:48
I think you should break your book up into sections based on topics. Don't write a trail journal. Write a chapter on food. One on gear. One on hiking philosophy. Etc.

max patch
01-31-2011, 15:06
I think you should write about something you know.

IceAge
01-31-2011, 15:09
A guide to finding good bacon along each one of the National Scenic Trails.

You can add my farm to the list for the Ice Age Trail, I have Certified Naturally Grown double-smoked bacon made from pasture raised Hereford hogs.

I also win for having the most adjectives to describe my bacon.

swjohnsey
01-31-2011, 15:09
Something funny.

Spokes
01-31-2011, 15:13
thinking of writing a hiking book. whats my slant?

How 'bout one written totally in a "Magic Eye" format. That should keep Lone Wolf up at night.....

RevLee
01-31-2011, 15:58
thinking of writing a hiking book. whats my slant?

Whatever you're inclined (:banana) to do, bring a new view and keep it humorous.

Shooting Star
01-31-2011, 16:13
Do an anthology of all the crazy, funny, snarky posts
and threads from Whiteblaze that you've had and comment
on them and organize by topic like someone else suggested.

And yeah - do the magic eye format. And when you're published,
put a bunch of autographed copies in Winton's shop. And maybe
do a Booknotes gig with Brian Lamb on CSPAN. That would be
fun to watch.

Good luck...

SS

lutefisk
01-31-2011, 17:00
Do an anthology of all the crazy, funny, snarky posts


The only reason I'm on WB is to compile a book - "the wisdom of matthewski"

I would have made millions... C'est la vie

Graywolf
01-31-2011, 17:04
What ever you do, please make your directions accrate and easy to follow..

fredmugs
01-31-2011, 17:13
I think you should write about something you know.

Bryson doesn't know ***** about hiking yet people keep buying his "hiking" book.

kayak karl
01-31-2011, 17:20
along the lines of Ray Bradbury's "The Illustrated Man".
you could do a painting and pull stories from that:-?

Diatribe
01-31-2011, 17:50
write about your wacky, intelligent & famous friends; humorous yet philosophical anecdotes backdropped with various beautiful views & campsites along our trail. dangerous weather, unnerving animal encounters, poops & giggles, etc

Mr Weinstone, I would read a book you put together:cool:

chiefiepoo
01-31-2011, 17:54
your slant would be slightly over the edge

tawa
01-31-2011, 18:08
Write it from the views of the animals --and maybe mice--along the trails and near the shelters. Have them describing what its like from their view --being invaded by 2,000 of these things called hikers with all of their styles--gear--mannerisms etc.
It will be a hoot!! lol
Remember to cut me in--when this book goes big! No doubt a movie will follow. This is a winner---trust me on this one.

Roland
01-31-2011, 18:16
If I buy the book, do I get the pdf for free? ;)

max patch
01-31-2011, 18:22
Mr Weinstone, I would read a book you put together:cool:

I'd rather take LSD.
Same result, just quicker.

Roland
01-31-2011, 18:27
I'd rather take LSD.
Same result, just quicker.

If you really feel that way, why are you on this thread?

Crapping on other WB members is not cool.

sir limpsalot
01-31-2011, 18:36
If you really feel that way, why are you on this thread?

Crapping on other WB members is not cool.


.......Hmmmm, are you sure?

Pringles
01-31-2011, 18:37
Why thank you for asking. I think your slant should be about 35*, leaning northward.

Pringles

Speakeasy TN
01-31-2011, 18:37
If you really feel that way, why are you on this thread?

Crapping on other WB members is not cool.

Do you remember your Mother ever saying," If you can't say something nice............?":-?

Skidsteer
01-31-2011, 18:43
Do you remember your Mother ever saying," If you can't say something nice............?":-?

....then talk about them behind their back?

Like it was yesterday.

hikerboy57
01-31-2011, 19:04
Do an anthology of all the crazy, funny, snarky posts
and threads from Whiteblaze that you've had and comment
on them and organize by topic like someone else suggested.

And yeah - do the magic eye format. And when you're published,
put a bunch of autographed copies in Winton's shop. And maybe
do a Booknotes gig with Brian Lamb on CSPAN. That would be
fun to watch.

Good luck...

SS
I second this idea, and absolutely no spell check.

Shooting Star
01-31-2011, 19:32
Write it from the views of the animals --and maybe mice--along the trails and near the shelters. Have them describing what its like from their view --being invaded by 2,000 of these things called hikers with all of their styles--gear--mannerisms etc.
It will be a hoot!! lol
Remember to cut me in--when this book goes big! No doubt a movie will follow. This is a winner---trust me on this one.

Another good idea. And maybe it's a Pixar animated flick with cute little
shelter mice and bears that compare notes on all the best shelters
and campspots to steal food from - a blockbuster...

hikerboy57
01-31-2011, 19:39
do what kerouac did, put a player piano roll of paper in the typewriter and just keep following that inimitable stream of conciousness.

V Eight
01-31-2011, 19:55
Where’s the Pre-release order link? I’m in!:banana

sbhikes
01-31-2011, 20:10
If I had access to the database here, what I would do is select * from posts where user_id = 7355 and then I would just dump all that into Word and upload it to lulu.com.

Done.

Graywolf
01-31-2011, 20:11
Where’s the Pre-release order link? I’m in!:banana

I second that. Do we get pre-release order discounts??:D

hikerboy57
01-31-2011, 20:12
I just want to know if you'll have it done for my April 2012 start date.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 01:04
i have to do it while thruhiking to be inspired. someone should back me. you can have every cent. just pay my rent while im gon and food for the hike. i dont need another thing. i will give you a finnished whatever you call it, manuscript?, on the summit of katahdin or springer whitchever way i hike. the book would be a zens guid to motercycle maintenence combined with an electric kool aid acid test and a journey to ixalon with don juan and a euell gibbons walk with spring stalking the wild earl. i will work off the loan if it fails. my colateral is my word. the book would breech such subjects as the lonelyness of the hike with the freedom from sociaty with the downfall of man and the journey to enlightenment. with a touch of scilent spring and a 70's , cindy ross dan wingfoot ed garvy philosofers guide zeen look.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 01:16
southbounding would lend a more contemplative air and the proper old school direction to walk or read about. after all it is the AT maine to georgia.the photoes in the book should all be sceans containing bacon for continuity of theme. some editing should be done in parentheses for clarity where spelling prevents reading. the funds from a succesfull book could be used to hike and write a book each year so starting as a volume of works would be the format. if every year i hiked and wrote, it would be a breifing on thinking while hiking , for prehiking study. kind of a terms and conditions statement of the appalachian trail for a givin year. without being a guide it could be a guide to what kinds of things take place rather than how to get to a place. a newbee would read it and learn two important things. hikers are nuts. and hiking is a matter of bringing fun into the further places.

hobbs
02-01-2011, 02:43
How about a paint by numbers Hiking guide...Add a little scratch and sniff bacon...Pure Goldmine!!! It say's money!!!

hikerboy57
02-01-2011, 09:58
i have to do it while thruhiking to be inspired. someone should back me. you can have every cent. just pay my rent while im gon and food for the hike. i dont need another thing. i will give you a finnished whatever you call it, manuscript?, on the summit of katahdin or springer whitchever way i hike. the book would be a zens guid to motercycle maintenence combined with an electric kool aid acid test and a journey to ixalon with don juan and a euell gibbons walk with spring stalking the wild earl. i will work off the loan if it fails. my colateral is my word. the book would breech such subjects as the lonelyness of the hike with the freedom from sociaty with the downfall of man and the journey to enlightenment. with a touch of scilent spring and a 70's , cindy ross dan wingfoot ed garvy philosofers guide zeen look.
Love the concept.
rent should be a somewhat fixed expense, give or take a month, but just how much bacon will be involved?

Turtle Feet
02-01-2011, 10:28
Just be sure to print it on trail TP- it'll be a multi-tasking, bio-degradable, earth-friendly book! :sun

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 10:35
to a one, everyone ive talked with about this idea belives its a winner. i owe 3 monthes rent and 3 monthes gas phone and electric. i have very little time remaining before the mens shelter and the church soup kitchens.in total i owe about 2200$ and with the cost of a hike and a camera and a word prossessing devise to write the book over a 6 month period, including rent and bills while hiking, im looking at a figure of about 10,000$.
i belive my book could be written as a seriouse guide to what to exspect thruhiking from the perspective of a seasoned outdoorsman documenting the joys of the hike. it would be a riot of laughter and a bank of knowlage combined with a deep understanding of nature and people and hiking.it might be called," the mattheski document", or " the matthewski papers" and would come out new and revised each year. i know i could do this if anyone is interested in backing me. witch they arent, cause everyones broke and i dont have a track record of selling books. but remember if you will the writters who became sucessfull with no exsperience like salvester stalone who wrote rocky on a whim. or rod sterling who envisioned whole episodes of twilight zone and scribbled them out in an hour in some cases. all i need is cash and i could make this happen. my book would be the instant best seller as im funneier and smarter and more insightfull and a better hiker than most. the creative jucies that would flow to my pen would be fueld by the fire of a lifetimes dream ignighted. please someone light my fire?

Awol1970
02-01-2011, 10:36
some editing should be done in parentheses for clarity where spelling prevents reading.

That's hilarious. And snippets like these in the midst of the rambling is why this book would be a cult classic. Probably never on the NYT bestsellers list but certainly profitable for the right investor.

If I had some discretionary income right now I'd back him. Matt is wayyyyy more talented than people give hiim credit for.

hikerboy57
02-01-2011, 10:44
still havent addressed the cost of bacon, but when it comes down to it, $10k is $100 for 100 investors. I dont know about anyone else, but I'm in.(additioanl bacon cost can be negotiated)The more people, the less per. How many out there are willing?

Sickmont
02-01-2011, 10:46
I'm thinking it'd be like a sort of cross between "Naked Lunch" and a hiking guide. I'd buy it in a heartbeat!

Awol1970
02-01-2011, 10:50
still havent addressed the cost of bacon, but when it comes down to it, $10k is $100 for 100 investors. I dont know about anyone else, but I'm in.(additioanl bacon cost can be negotiated)The more people, the less per. How many out there are willing?

I am for schizzle.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 10:51
thank you awol. some interestin things i could draw on for content are things like the fact that i went awol from the usmc cause i diddnt wanna kill folks in el salvadore and untill i turnned myself in and worked it out with the marines, i planned to hide out on the trail. i was 17 on paris and had my 18th birthday on e beach. things like hikeing in the 70's and things like being a volenteer and a hiker who dosnt eat trailfoods or carry snickers. things like the fact that im a hippie jew who is a christian in love with jesuses boossoms and things like im an exsulent foreger and trail cook. my ability to arrange strange magic for other hikers and my being known as an idiot would all lend themselves to a book that would bring out my full creative potential. i am a rennesance man and i do as many different things well as leanardo did. i create trail games like "trail gremlin". its a simple game, one of many, to be included in the book in a discssion of how to distract hikers from their worries and concerns of their hiking to fun and senceless sillyness. gremlin is played alone. its when you are way out in front of your pals and you arrive at a campsite where everyone will be staying and you set up camp then walk back down the trail just around the first bend from camp. hideing behind a tree you jump out and scare your pals. when they ask how far is the shelter, or campsite, you tell them about a mile. thry lower their head, stop laughing and march on bummed out that its a whole mile to camp only to find out its just around the very next bend. it sounds silly but its tons of fun.

wvgrinder
02-01-2011, 11:04
How about a children's pop-up book? There could be little mice & stoves popping up in the shelters. And it would be cool to have a hiker standing by the side of the road with their thumb out. A small lever could be moved in & out to make the arm go up and down. :)

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 11:21
no. pop up books would not be for potential thruhikers. i want to rule the kingdom of prehike books. i want my book to give peace to the newbee like the what to exspect books do to pegnant couples. and any pop up book i would write wouldnt have meer thumbs going up and down. it would start with a double page pop up showing an exploded pack with all its gear on the ground and a befuddled hiker looking down on it in confusion. pull the lever and all the gear goes in the pack and the hikers frown turnes to a smile. next page. the lever pulled activates the hikers pack, raising it onto the scale at the arch as the scales weight numbers turn and spin to 29lbs and the hikers face lights up a smile. next. pull the lever and a big pile of macs and cheese tips over the cookpot and stove as flames rise and the hikers frown apperes . next . pull the lever and bozo pops out of the woods as the hiker turns and runs. next. pull the lever and miss janet opens the door of the new erwin hiking center with a look of, "whos there?" as well known hikers like jack and sly and wonder are seen thru the open door drinking and laughing red faced and dirty in the backround. etc.

lutefisk
02-01-2011, 11:27
$10k is $100 for 100 investors. I dont know about anyone else, but I'm in.
If we can get 100 for $100 I'd be in. Probably have to self-publish through someplace like lulu.com.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 11:55
i want my book to instill in the newbee a sence of liveing life on the trail as opposed to hiking while your life is on hold. i want to teach how to remove the maximum amout of stuggel and worry from a hike and add a measure of fun. i want to suggest ways to enjoy rather than ways to survive. and i want to show how to hike without direcly instructing but rather by laughing and crying. this book needs to be the authority on how hiking is the funnest thing on earth.by demonstrating my technique and crakking my jokes and disscussing the world and showing the face of hikerdom in its beaming healthy light.

the preface will be written by myron. to lend a juctoposition between the 2nd thruhiker, and the next generation. sort of a hand off.

the dedication will be to greg terry who was an AT hiker who died on rainer when i was in my early 20s.

the cover art will be done each year by fishin fread and will simply show whatever jewlry or trail sticker hes worked on that year.

a special pen will be constructed that writes with colored bacon greese for book signings.

whenever im on pprah or being interveiwed by barbra walters or on good morning america talking about the book, i will carry my pack and staff and arrive dirty and smelly and will eat all manner of snack and tend to blisters while being interveiwed.

alternative title idea:
the matthewski effect
matthewski 357
the 23 cronicals
14 states of mind
truhiking the appalachian tale
this is your brain on trail
my life with little debbie
snickers snors spam and spring
becoming trash
the book of matthewski
special english hiking
eating out

rgarling
02-01-2011, 11:57
do what kerouac did, put a player piano roll of paper in the typewriter and just keep following that inimitable stream of conciousness.

Exactly. This is a perfect fit for Matty. (Of course, it will need a good editor.)

Spokes
02-01-2011, 11:58
....

whenever im on pprah or being interveiwed by barbra walters or on good morning america talking about the book, i will carry my pack and staff and arrive dirty and smelly and will eat all manner of snack and tend to blisters while being interveiwed.

....

Then be sure your booked the same day Tom Waits (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9mhsW5aWJM) is on the show.

I'd sell your heart to the junkman baby
For a buck, for a buck.....

BTW, you're not afraid of emu's are you?

Awol1970
02-01-2011, 12:59
"Truhiking the Appalachian Tale"

Brilliant.

hikerboy57
02-01-2011, 13:01
"Truhiking the Appalachian Tale"

Brilliant.perfect title !!

sbhikes
02-01-2011, 13:55
matthewski reminds me of my boyfriend. He comes up with all these great ideas. Talks about them from every angle. Has it all worked out. Then nothing. All talk, no action. Just do it, matthewski.

Spokes
02-01-2011, 14:17
matthewski reminds me of my boyfriend. He comes up with all these great ideas. Talks about them from every angle. Has it all worked out. Then nothing. All talk, no action. Just do it, matthewski.

As my Dad use to say "It don't cost nothing to dream".

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 14:28
matthewski reminds me of my boyfriend. He comes up with all these great ideas. Talks about them from every angle. Has it all worked out. Then nothing. All talk, no action. Just do it, matthewski.
cant do much with nothin. i have a cup of laundry soap, a sprinkle of toothpowder, beans, a jar of penut butter half full, 25 cents, half a roll of tp, two tee shirts and two shorts and two sox and two undys,200,000$ in debt, 3 garneshments, four leins, an empty ebt account,a closed bank account, a gas shut off, an overused pur filter on my tap blinking to change it for about 2 months,a son just back from rehab living in a heroin feinds house in camden out of touch and stoned, two bad cavitys ,no skin lotion,clothes and bedding thats been only hand washed for 2 years and are filth rags, empty cubords and fridge, a computer that only gets whiteblaze and craigs list and cant do email, a phone shut off, no weapon(sold all for food),and blood sugar below 70 for months causeing thinking to turn to hateing.but,.......im the richest, happyest, healthyest most blessed person ive ever met. i have god. and soon i will rule the known artworld with an iron fist and my 20+ years of illustrating the bible will be my ticket out of this getto.im doing better than all of you!

Spokes
02-01-2011, 14:51
Golly, that was like reading a Charles Bukowski (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q678-FPHvB0&feature=related) piece.

God bless my friend.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 15:05
this 2004 ibookg4 cant veiw utube. whats charles bukowski?

wvgrinder
02-01-2011, 15:11
cant do much with nothin. i have a cup of laundry soap, a sprinkle of toothpowder, beans, a jar of penut butter half full, 25 cents, half a roll of tp, two tee shirts and two shorts and two sox and two undys,200,000$ in debt, 3 garneshments, four leins, an empty ebt account,a closed bank account, a gas shut off, an overused pur filter on my tap blinking to change it for about 2 months,a son just back from rehab living in a heroin feinds house in camden out of touch and stoned, two bad cavitys ,no skin lotion,clothes and bedding thats been only hand washed for 2 years and are filth rags, empty cubords and fridge, a computer that only gets whiteblaze and craigs list and cant do email, a phone shut off, no weapon(sold all for food),and blood sugar below 70 for months causeing thinking to turn to hateing.but,.......im the richest, happyest, healthyest most blessed person ive ever met. i have god. and soon i will rule the known artworld with an iron fist and my 20+ years of illustrating the bible will be my ticket out of this getto.im doing better than all of you!


We should all wish to be as happyest as you. :D

Spokes
02-01-2011, 15:12
Here's his wiki (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Bukowski). A mis-understood genius he was. Yep.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 17:47
just read the wiki thingi. he is like me in a way. so i am a great writter needing only a patron. wow. that changes things. i do have the ability to write what others want to read . yes, i will be a writter. i will never be the artist i drempt of and bothered god for all these years. wow. thank you. im a writter. all i need is time to write and not to have to work. someone please help me! i could be that guy easy. i got observations and a kindness and a way of asplanin stuff that would sell easy. im going to start tonight. and with no booze i should be better than his silly drunken rambelings.lol. never heard of the guy till 4 minutes ago.lol.ill write all the things people do that they wont admit. ill write about being alive and concious in a dead comotose world. ill write of bacon and women and other soft beautiful things. ill write poems, not like the thousand poems i have about the bible, poems about feelings and about love and about bacon. ill write about hiking and starving and not haveing toothpowder. ill be aclaimed. ill be a philanthropist. ill live in a squat and like a monk on the cold floor with only an apple and a cookie to eat each day. wait, i allready live like that.lol. ill buy things to give to people like houses and land and educations for children. ill run for office and be a statesman in my later years and write bills on how we should not write more bills. ill live with a woman who is even weirder than me with wirey hair like frankensteins bride. ill have partys and tell people to all bring their packs and well hike in hords . ill make films and do lunch with tigger and get lwolf some of his old sox. ill ,................be a writter. maby. if i could only stop drawing these dam bible blobs and monsters. but alas, i cant. i love my crayons and wont ever trade them for pencils. sept for one hiking book. so i can hike. then ill just let the world beg me for more. lmao.

Spokes
02-01-2011, 19:10
Well then, start writing short poems 'bout life. Put them in a "collection" then do readings of your work in small, smokey coffee shops. Someone will discover you, you'll get an agent, and do the book tour thingy. Then hire Lone Wolf to stand at the head of the cue at the Barnes and Noble just to keep the peace and keep the line moving. Be sure to always carry a Sharpie pen (black) and practice scribbling your unintelligible signature. Might want to memorize some pithy sayings that keep people guessing. I can hear it now- the throngs of people saying "He's a genius!".

You're star-bound I tell ya............

George
02-01-2011, 19:20
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roland
If you really feel that way, why are you on this thread?

Crapping on other WB members is not cool.

.......Hmmmm, are you sure?

only if kinky is cool

garbanz
02-01-2011, 19:44
Matty
Use the everpresent Rob Frost in you. Make it rhyme and put it in STANZAS.

mweinstone
02-01-2011, 22:43
who the hell is rob?
im writting the book here and now. dont try to stop me. when enough great chapters are on wb, someone will call. i belive i have the first line of the book but im not sure. in my next post ill put up the first chapter. in about an hour.

TRUEHIKING THE APPALACHIAN TALE
matthewski

chapter one

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 00:08
i love this marble we call here.its the only marble for me. ive loved this marble all my life. its blue and grean. its wet and wild. it has fun and sun. this is one heck of a marble. the spinings a little obnoxious. and i could do with out the caps. all forboding and stuff. they really dont need to be so forboding. but the bumps, ahhh the bumps. bumps aint no joke. no joke at all.
people use special walking to get over the bumps. not regular walkin. sidewalks for regular walkin. bumpwalkers need stuff. bumps are long some of them. and they go high up. people need stuff to get to the bumps, to walk all special up the bumps, to lay on the bumps at night they need stuff, to put things inside them that make them special walk the bumps they need stuff, and to stay long times on the bumps they need stuff.
stuff bumpwalkers use has to be carryed in a special bumpwalker sac called a 55 litre black diamond shadow. thats just a big word for a bumpwalker sac.
they got words them special walkers. words that dont sound right. they use special words .cause regular words dont have enough power to go high up and over bumps and down them and up again. regular stuff dont work where they go. everything they carry is special stuff. the only regular thing they have with them is air. they use regular air.
matthewski, bumpwalker 36 years. proud of every darn tootin minute. ive seen things. special things regular things scootch outta the way for. things so special, only bumpwalkers know about them. we dont keep secrets. its just that most folks are on the phone and we dont like to innterupt. its impolite.
my crew walks the east part of the marble. they got crews everywhere down here. folks walkin east, west, north and south. we the east. we proud. you come over here were gonna cook you a steak and show you our bumps and invite you to come from one side of our turf to the other with us on one of our thruwalks. thats what we call bumpwalkin all the way from one end of our turf to the other in one long time.
any walkers that wanna join our family can. we adopt all the walkers from all the sides of the marble. were the old family. not the new ones like out west and down south and up north. folks been walkin our east bumps longer than horestail licorice commin out the backside of one of them black holes all stretched out far. our bumps got named appalachia for no reason at all. we would change it to something with a reason but it aint polite. might be that old folks named it and old folks are for respectin. you come with us on a long thrubump and your gonna get a special name. not like the storebought name you show up with. but a real, handcrafted, one of a kind special name like minesota smith. now he was a bumpwalker of note. or wyoming skateboarder. him too. real special. you go on and read thru this here blather and your gonna know all about bumpwalkin. common.

Iceaxe
02-02-2011, 00:59
Mathewski, your prose is similar to James Joyce's book Finnegans Wake. Only I can understand what you are saying. The emotions and descriptions in your writing come across very well and from unexpected "directions".
I think you could seriously write a unique book using that sorta stream of conciousness style you have.
Hikers on the trail are always talking about how someone should write a book about hitches, or the people you meet, or the amazing things that happen on the trail.
Maybe your book could be about all of it. The life before during and after a hike.
Anyhow If you could write a book thats anything like your posts on WB, I would buy your book. You got talent dude.

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 01:11
i know the word. but what s prose?

Iceaxe
02-02-2011, 01:14
Kinda like poetry. The words point to meanings beyond their own.

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 01:18
im declaring an emergency medical hike. its a term me and the dude use. it means your blood sugar is so off that only hiking can fix you. if i dont hike i will die. you all have till tommorow at noon to come up with the money. no tricks. unmarked non sequencial small bills in a plane brown envelope delivered to me by an unarmed courrier wearing a blue polyester golf winners suit.

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 01:20
Kinda like poetry. The words point to meanings beyond their own.

so whats that mean please? like the word meaning meaning being mean instead of meaning meaning?

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 01:31
my pack is packed and on its hook by the door as it has been since i was 14. putting my sleeping bag and water in it takes 3 minutes. tearing open the plane brown envelope takes 1. i can be at the arch by dinner manyanna. i got pankake mix and two bagles and i cant eat stuff like that but i will if you force me. my pack has the only food left in this room i can eat and i wont eat it till the trail. those 4 cans of sardeens are my life and i would rather die here than eat my last sardeens here and have no food in my pack. its just not how i roll. the pack food stays in the pack for the trail or i die tryin.whom ever backs me gets all the money. i wont need it where im goin. witch is directly to the bank with my second book when i return. if i go. if i dont die. if i dont eat white flour. now im gonna take a meeting with the big man and ask him if i can please live. i mean hike. he was a hiker long ago and hes gonna be all for this. he let moses go. he will let me.

Iceaxe
02-02-2011, 01:32
so whats that mean please? like the word meaning meaning being mean instead of meaning meaning?

Or perhaps the mean meaning means nothing other than the meaning.

Iceaxe
02-02-2011, 01:34
he was a hiker long ago and hes gonna be all for this. he let moses go. he will let me.

"He walks in the cool of the evening in the garden where we are."

Jim Adams
02-02-2011, 01:44
Just write it in the 23rd person!...as usual....it will be great!

geek

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 01:53
dear dead gost of earl, please haunt folks tonight and make them scared not to pay for me to right a book. thanks buddy.

dear dead gost of jimi hendrix.nothin. forget it.i was gonna say you might haunt any folks earl misses.

dear dead gost of earnest shakelton, your creepy, stay where you are i dont need you on this one. sorry to bother you. changed my mind.

dear dead gost of albert einstein, wait, they removed your brain didnt they. saw it in a jar somewhere. forgett it. you cant hear me.

dear dead gost of any old weirdo, i need you to haunt folks into being scared not to pay for me to write a book. lil help?

fehchet
02-02-2011, 11:25
When people beg for food or money out on the trail it's called "Yogi". maybe you are the Yogi of Yogi's fishing for those Hogies from the Fogies or Perogies in the Smokies or Smores from all the hiking boors. Money samoney bunny honey, not that funny but sad very sad. What's the name for it on WB?

rgarling
02-02-2011, 13:43
When people beg for food or money out on the trail it's called "Yogi". maybe you are the Yogi of Yogi's fishing for those Hogies from the Fogies or Perogies in the Smokies or Smores from all the hiking boors. Money samoney bunny honey, not that funny but sad very sad. What's the name for it on WB?

Nice try, but far too linear.

mweinstone
02-02-2011, 14:02
up a creek
meek
seek employment
for hiking enjoyment.

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 00:00
why are some words red?

Spokes
02-03-2011, 02:09
Pull A String, A Puppet Moves
by: Charles Bukowski

each man must realize
that it can all disappear very
quickly:
the cat, the woman, the job,
the front tire,
the bed, the walls, the
room; all our necessities
including love,
rest on foundations of sand -
and any given cause,
no matter how unrelated:
the death of a boy in Hong Kong
or a blizzard in Omaha ...
can serve as your undoing.
all your chinaware crashing to the
kitchen floor, your girl will enter
and you'll be standing, drunk,
in the center of it and she'll ask:
my god, what's the matter?
and you'll answer: I don't know,
I don't know ...

I love reading Bukowski

Awol1970
02-03-2011, 08:29
"Bumpwalker & Bumpwalker sac" is brilliant.

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 08:38
that dudes writings are relevent,...but not melodic. allow me:

at any given moment
a luggy coughed up can fly out
just putting it back can loose you respect
imagine
a bit of smokers brown coughings haveing such power
but they do
no think of world leaders

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 08:42
okay that sucked bad once more with feeling:

this today crap is really begining to wear like old sox
i can feel the ground reaching up saying join us
but in all the wilds beasts wait to chew the fleash from our loosers
so we march on bearfoot screeming and call it life
i say shoot the bear, eat him and make shoes

jerseydave
02-03-2011, 08:57
"14 states of mind"

It saiz it awl, and than sum.

In the off chance that this ever became a serious venture, I'd gladly sign up for my 1/100 th share....... as long as we don't get a "credit" page where the people responsible are listed.

Someone is sure to sue over this and I wanna be anonymous......;)

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 09:23
soon death will be death instead of the end of life and the beggining of battery operated life.
soon all this fake key turning papertowel driven supersized life we think we live will show itself for the terrible death it allways was. sooner than you will belive placenta will be food. soon all your little weird ideas such as colored underware and tea partys will turn to who can i eat. even your mind and heart will not belive whats in front of your eyes unless your soul is in line with truth.everything you know is poopicocka. you know absolutly nothing. you are as if your brain was sold for crack. driving around shopping and spreading chemicals and salting the earth for a bit of snow so you can kill today.not a wisp of a thing is good in man. not a wisp . captian crunch aint real.neither is your toilet or fridge. they are the apperations of a sick mind.you have created need in your minds. need does not exist. all has been provided.fear is what you build and death is only a dream to you. you call this enlightenment.you call whatever you like whatever suits your fancy. this is good and this is grape and here is god. wrong wrong wrong. your knowlage is so small , even the hubble telescope cannot find it. it exists only in theory and even those particals of theory are hypothetical. you simply imagine yourselves whatever you like. problem with that is, imagining does work to bring things to reality. but your sick twisted wants and needs caused you to imagine war and death. only hate makes you happy. only the ski jumper crashing helps. racecar crashes adorn your walls and you wish they all had helmit cams when the shuttle blew up. your hearts dead and mind toast and your earths long long gone from you. soon, on your dieing breath, you will not let go. never. you enjoy your fantasy that this world was created by space junk coliding and that snickers bars are sweet. you cant die. death hath run from you. we look forward to our life supports egerly. how happy is the modern man. very very happy. your such good liars you can imagine the proposterus and love it to death boasting all the way you are smart. no.if all the indigionus native peoples of long ago could see you they would fear you and kill you and destroy your works. like a parent haveing to kill a child.our emence evil killed us long ago and they would only be cutting down the chaf stalks of our shells. when todays sun sets you will count your money as scroodge and retire to your bed and visions of your life will atempt to communicate with you. and the dreams will fail. you cannot learn nor unlearn. you can only cook into hardness and finally scald in the pan. to be a man is a terrible thing.requiring hate of the creater and love of destruction covered like an easter egg in dark lies sweet.as you feast on your love of black and become it. their are no well lite graves filled with simple problems of hell or reward. only the missed exit to the land of oppurtunity. and the long searching for an alternative route. your gps in your car teaches life better than your stanford proffs.
off course.

Spokes
02-03-2011, 15:22
Powerful stuff.

........... looks like my work here is done.

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 18:27
its morbid and awful and yukky. i hate it. but thanks.

mweinstone
02-03-2011, 18:35
the secret of the appalachian trail is itself.
a prime secret.
to know it is to have an advantage in all things.

camojack
02-04-2011, 05:02
thinking of writing a hiking book. whats my slant?
Wut hav yu dun wif maffewsky? :confused:

mweinstone
02-04-2011, 08:00
when mother nesessity gives birth to her children invention, it can be said the children are what was needed in moms house. like more spagettie. or sauce. or even toilet paper and soap.the childrens birth names may all be,"invention nessesity", but their friends call them nicknames like toilet paper or soap or little sauce nessesity or spagettie nessesity jr. when ma nessesity married pa nessesity it was a good match. ma nessesitys maiden name is "makedo". the root of that being" makeno", from the greek words,"make nothing"

mweinstone
02-04-2011, 08:16
when everything that was invented was finished being birthed,ma and pa nessesity had one last child. named hikin.hikin was their special child. their only unessesary child, hikin went on to become the world leader in the feild of makedo.he rebeled against his parents and refused to invent out of need and instead focused his life energys on want. this eventualy led to a revelution witch was the beggining of what we now call greed.

kolokolo
02-05-2011, 01:20
You should print excerpts from your Whiteblaze 'radio call-in show'.

mweinstone
02-06-2011, 15:49
made an art project once.have it here on this computer. its called "should". hold on ill be right back with a scizzors and paste.




Should.

Writers are hired to write a book about all the shoulds they’ve ever been told. Example: Matt, you should cut your hair. Matt, you should stop painting. Matt, you should pray more. Shoulds are organized into categories. They are gathered over a period of five years by a team who takes the name, photograph and time of each should. A coffee table top book is published. The message of this project that shoulds are hopeful wishes. They replace praying and ministering and pitying people and for people, and to people. “Don’t should me, pray for me, minister unto me, pity me”

mweinstone
02-06-2011, 15:52
just for an example of my style, im going to post one more art project of mine choosen at random. my files contain millions of these projects.



March 2004, Art project 66, Elvisite

Create an element chart which if existed would drive people crazy wanting to own an atom or a single molecule of the rare, “new” elements. Auctions would break all sales records. Sales of “new” elements would become the playground of the rich collectors. Example: element E. After collecting all known possesions of Elvis which are for sale, DNA is extracted from the hand prints on his possessions to create “Elvisite”. With it’s atomic weight of 7, Elvisite is praised for it’s lucky qualities and properties, sought after by gamblers as a charm. It is estimated that Elvisite is worth one million dollars per molecule.

Spokes
02-06-2011, 16:25
...........



Should.

Writers are hired to write a book about all the shoulds they’ve ever been told. Example: Matt, you should cut your hair. Matt, you should stop painting. Matt, you should pray more. Shoulds are organized into categories. They are gathered over a period of five years by a team who takes the name, photograph and time of each should. A coffee table top book is published. The message of this project that shoulds are hopeful wishes. They replace praying and ministering and pitying people and for people, and to people. “Don’t should me, pray for me, minister unto me, pity me”

Should we be reading this?

Carbo
02-06-2011, 16:29
Write a book called "Miles of Spagetti and Pancakes". Just add thoughts between recipes as you move along.

T-Dubs
02-06-2011, 16:32
Will there eventually be an English translation of this book?

mweinstone
02-06-2011, 17:49
hiker bellys up in moderate tradeing today on the comoditys exchange.
while picked foil dropped sharply to 2$ a barrel.
the asian ramman markets closed early today in observance of rammadan.
stocks to watch?
a startup out of new orleans has come up with a bacon powered stove.

10-K
02-06-2011, 17:57
If I buy the book, do I get the pdf for free? ;)

Yes, but you won't be eligible for the Hall of Fame. :)

Awol1970
02-06-2011, 18:42
the asian ramman markets closed early today in observance of rammadan.


More brilliance.

Tinker
02-06-2011, 18:48
thinking of writing a hiking book. whats my slant?
Just market it to folks who don't like capital letters or other silly English grammatical nonsense. :D:)

mweinstone
02-06-2011, 19:29
truehiking the appalachian tale is alot harder than thruhiking the appalachian trail. even though thruhiking is truehiking and the appalachian tale is the appalachian trail. one is lived. one is exsperienced. the truth of the tale must be lived. a thru of the trail may be exsperienced, but unless lived, belays the true tale.

Johnny Thunder
02-07-2011, 09:12
matty. i will edit. anthologize. prologue. forward. and bibliograph this amazing work from a far away land. i'll do everything except write the damn thing for you...except pay you to do it because i'm in the land of the cash-free and the land of the brave new thick-cut bacon world (AKA Sang Gyeop Sal).

mweinstone
02-07-2011, 09:38
matty. i will edit. anthologize. prologue. forward. and bibliograph this amazing work from a far away land. i'll do everything except write the damn thing for you...except pay you to do it because i'm in the land of the cash-free and the land of the brave new thick-cut bacon world (AKA Sang Gyeop Sal).

sang gyeop sal is my fav.mmmmmmmmmmm sang gyeop sal.i dont know what a anthologize or a prologue or a bibliograph are but i have seen them in the fronts of books. and i can guess what a forward is and have read them . just not sure what the definition of these terms are. your both very kind and very stupid.where to begin,.......

when mr and mrs johnney thunder seiniors decided to birth my pal, they had three things they knew they wanted in their child.a hiker, twinkely eyes and chicken samitch. they started camping around chickens and makeing eyebright tea and hiking .
mrs johnney thunder seinior and mr johnney thunder seinior surrounded themselves with all mannor of chicken samich. their fridge was full of em. their freezer was full of them, they had dryed chicken samich in their cubboards etc. but they never ate them. they craved them so hard and for so long in hopes of creating a child that would naturaly have a feirce wonderlust for the samiches. when johhney was born they saw the twinkely eyes and the birthmark in the shape of a blaze on his double nipple,...but new not if the child would ween from the milk and find his path to chicken samitch. in his 13th year, he became the worlds leading authority on chicken samich and studdied under the greats such as general toe and curnal saunders. (tryed so hard to figure out how to spell colornal?...cant break the code.) he was asked to speak at massachusetts institute of technology and cal tech on the subject. at 16 he spoke before the congress of funding for third world chickens. and as a mature hiker with twinkely eyes he made his home in the nearly chickenless land of korea helping chicken impoverished youth learn the way of the western samitch. he is a the foremost authority on the subject and spends his days curating his meuseum of chicken samich in soul.

Johnny Thunder
02-07-2011, 10:04
i'm sending that to my parents.

mweinstone
02-07-2011, 10:30
one day johnney thunder was hiking the AT reasearching his latest book, "if bacon flew". a dissertation on the merits of bacon wrapped chicken samich. during his intence reacearch he stumbled on a discovery so shocking it would rock the poultry world to its chickenfeet. quite by accedent he created a samich so univeral it could feed chickens, bacons or man. it was made of soylent brown. a slurry of both pig,chicken and lipton sides that could be used to feed starving nations peoples. he was awarded the golden beak by president obamma.the highest civillian award for exsulence in multimeat pioneering. this is why i hike with johnney thunderchicken.

mweinstone
02-07-2011, 15:40
book story line
here is the story line for a book.

The main character in this book is a shelter mouse. This mouse will be a talking mouse with human characteristics kind of like "mickey mouse". This mouse will have mouse friends in the shelter and the mice will sit around talking about the thru-hikers, section hikers and weekenders that they observe as they pass thru.

Within this plot there are many possible sub-plots, some hikers will drop food for the mice and some crazy hikers will place traps to kill mice. One famous mouse will be kid-napped and taken all the way to Mt Katahdin by a hiker. Mice will plan food raids at night with the precision of military operations and will steal bedding material from hikers.

Story starts when mice come out of hibernation and await the hikers arrival.

Panzer