View Full Version : under what circumstances would a hiker receive a lifetime supply of bacon?
mweinstone
02-10-2011, 07:19
like being thanked for saveing a hog farmers daughter from baltimore jack. or being recognized for trail bravery in the face of all baconless odds.
mweinstone
02-10-2011, 07:25
all references to hog farmers daughters must be modled on the elly may modle
all references to hog farmers must be modled on the caricature "paw"
all references to hogs in any form must contain the words, "bacon".
I still think you need a catfish farm.
If you could figure out how to make bacon bits from catfish you would become more famous than most famous people.
the early riser gets the bacon. every time. look at the times of these posts, for crying out loud.
mweinstone
02-10-2011, 07:42
the bacon achemists of the ages could not figure out how to make cooked bacon in a bag. its a miserable failure what is in stores today. a testiment to their failure. my idea for cooked bacon in a bag is so revolutionary it will change third world bacon consumtion for the future. my unique process actually delivers a hot sizzeling peice of real bacon to toungs worldwide regaurdless of conditions or cooking means or refrigeration available.
from a central plant to be built on the buckle of the pork suspender belt, real, thick cut, double smoked aged peppered neck bacon will be vacusealed and placed in dry ice. along with a very powerfull magnifing parabolic bacon cooker made totaly disposable. the shelf life of the insulated dry iced package is 5 days in dessert heat.indefenatly in cold climats. the bacon starved user simply opens and cooks when sunshine allows. total cost, these units can be mass produced to sell at about a dollar above the cost of bacon sold in stores.
writting my congressman ,........now.
mweinstone
02-10-2011, 07:45
ive allways gotten up early. dont wanna miss the end of the world. they call me nautical dawn.
camojack
02-10-2011, 09:27
writting my congressman ,........now.
Don't forget to use spell check.
(As if... :datz)
Two Tents
02-10-2011, 10:08
under what circumstances would a hiker receive a lifetime supply of bacon? I nominate a hiker, who on a day off from hiking, who eats an entire fruit cake while watching Lord of the Rings on vhs. That movie gets the bacon juices flowing!
Sickmont
02-10-2011, 10:19
How do you define a "lifetime" supply of bacon? Wouldn't a bacon overdose kill you rather quickly?
LoneRidgeRunner
02-10-2011, 10:24
writting my congressman ,........now.
Oh God! Who does this remind you of?
:datz:eek:
I still think you need a catfish farm.
If you could figure out how to make bacon bits from catfish you would become more famous than most famous people.
I think that would be easier to do with hogfish.
Little pieces of catfish would just be kitty litter!
Buzz_Lightfoot
02-11-2011, 13:52
I still think you need a catfish farm.
If you could figure out how to make bacon bits from catfish you would become more famous than most famous people.
It's been tried, my friend. Sorta like turning lead to gold. Catfish modified on an atomic level could be perhaps be turned into bacon. perhaps.
For millenia, alchemists tried to turn lead into gold. They all failed until the atomic age. Turns out you can change lead into gold but the process leaves the gold radioactive. Wouldn't bacon derived from catfish likewise be radioactive?
Oh never mind, good bacon is already radioactive.
BL
The Cleaner
02-11-2011, 14:08
like being thanked for saveing a hog farmers daughter from baltimore jack. or being recognized for trail bravery in the face of all baconless odds. Speaking of Bacon,I saw some "Tactical Bacon" on E-Bay a few days ago.This was in a can w/shelf life of 10 years.Is this Bacon used by SWAT teams when they're kickin' down doors?:eek:
Sickmont
02-11-2011, 15:43
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y157/sickmont/bacon-toothpaste.jpg