View Full Version : Psyching Myself UP / Psyching Myself OUT (2012 NoBo Thru-Hiker)
RossSFCA
12-08-2011, 03:51
Hey folks!
I am ready to go on the AT in 2012 (arriving Atlanta 03/10 and hitting the Trail on 03/11)!! I am really excited to be a NoBo Thru-Hiker!
I hiked the John Muir Trail from Tuolumne Meadows to Mt. Whitney in July/August 2011, so I have been out on a challenging trail, carrying my own food & litter, sleeping outside, filtering my own water, etc. for about three weeks. I have all of my clothing and gear, I have been reading the guides and books, and I feel pretty confident that I will be able to hike the AT from March - September (provided I do not become ill or seriously injured).
I am three months and one week away from my trip, and I am starting to psych myself out. :eek: Unfortunately, I lost my job at the end of October (a down economy is a great time to hit the Trail, right?!?), so I have more time to prepare and train for my big hike... but also more time to worry if I am doing the right thing (as if hiking the AT is the "wrong thing"?). Clearly, I am "over-thinking" the whole experience.
I am trying to read TrailJournals and WhiteBlaze, as well as the stories of former hikers/thru-hikers. But, for every inspiring "Becoming Odyssa" (Jennifer Pharr Davis), there is an equally disappointing "Walk In The Woods" (Bill Bryson).
I don't want to avoid people (other hikers) altogether and be isolated for six months, but I don't want to be around negative people who will criticize me and tear me down. I really want to be around folks who will encourage me and build me up. In turn, I really want to be supportive and enthusiastic about others' hikes, too.
ALL THAT TO SAY... I would appreciate your supportive words and encouragement. Is it natural to "freak out" a few months before leaving for the Trail? Leaving my home/my friends/my dog for six/seven months is daunting, so I would love to hear from experienced thru-hikers who were on the Trail for many, many months.
Also, I would love to hear from the Class of 2012 thru-hikers who are getting ready for their big hike, too!
THANK YOU, EVERYONE!
Ross / DirtyGirl
San Francisco, CA
i'm right there with you.. i'll be heading north sometime mid march.. i was pumped, ready to go...prepaired as much as i could, told my job i was taking some time off.. and now i'm like.. "im really doing it" scared as ****,, i dont know... i know my mind is my worst enemy sometimes, being too analytical.. im all in at this point, i can be scared of push through the fear and take advantage of a once in a life time opportunity,, lets do this.
Slo-go'en
12-08-2011, 12:40
I don't want to avoid people (other hikers) altogether and be isolated for six months, but I don't want to be around negative people who will criticize me and tear me down. I really want to be around folks who will encourage me and build me up. In turn, I really want to be supportive and enthusiastic about others' hikes, too.
Like anywhere else, people around you take thier cues from you and respond in kind. If your positive and up beat, (most) everyone around you will treat you the same way. It's infectous. OTOH, if your always complaining about this and that (though we all like to bitch about the weather if it's rotten), you'll start to get lonely pretty quick.
Walking away from what you know and are familier with is scarry, but doing so is in our DNA. We want to know what's on the other side of the mountain or across the sea. Embrace the adventure.
kayak karl
12-08-2011, 13:22
hiking the trail is a very selfish venture, things will not be the same when you get back. there are gains and there are losses. what are u prepared to lose.
It's natural to feel freaked out about big change, or even change of pace... Just do it if you are interested in doing it. Regret is for no man/woman.
People are very positive on the trail from my experience thru hiking this year...
kayak karl
12-08-2011, 16:05
[QUOTE=Chop;1225555 Regret is for no man/woman.[/QUOTE]
please explain you thoughts.......
I had passed on an opportunity for a thru and still regretting it 12 years later.
Do it.
Kerosene
12-08-2011, 17:45
You've made your decision to take a long hike, which for most people doesn't come easily. Recognize that no one makes a big, life-changing decision without a little trepidation and fear of the unknown. In this case, you can rest assured that thousands of people have gone before you, with the vast majority recommending that you undertake this endeavor for as long as you're enjoying being out there walking. You're in a good position to take the plunge, and if something doesn't work out (e.g., you get injured, you aren't enjoying yourself, you're running out of money) then you'll be in a similar place to where you are now and you will have learned something.
If you've been out there for 3 consecutive weeks then you'll be fine with hiking the AT from a physical and self-sufficiency standpoing. Your real challenge, as it is for most thru-hikers, will be your mental fortitude in motivating yourself to get up and walk for another day for 5-6 months straight. You don't want a few bad days to kick you off the trail, but you also don't want to force yourself to do something you hate for days on end.
Mike2012
12-08-2011, 18:26
I'm leaving NOBO in the same time frame with mostly excitement but a little trepidation as I put my "career" on hold. I'd thought seriously about a thru hike 20 years ago but other plans emerged. This time it's on! The economy was part of the push to hike this time for me as well. I was busting ass to cover rent and bills and not really getting anywhere when a lightbulb went off in my head that I can save $4,200-6,300 on rent and another $1,200-2,000 in bills and fulfill a life long dream to do the thru hike. Carpe diem !
Blissful
12-08-2011, 20:39
I know I went through a similar thing - wondering if I am doing the right thing and what I am really getting myself in to. I actually let peace be my guide. Do you have a peace inside yourself for what you are doing? Is this the right time in your life? Are things falling into place for you to do it? Do you have some supportive team members on the homefront (I found this very helpful to me; that I could call someone while I was on the trail and they would encourage me).
As far as meeting negative people,you'll meet all sorts on the trail, but I must say I had seldom met a negative hiker. Everyone is in the same boat. Everyone has a dream they want fulfilled, a goal to reach, new horizons to see. You laugh and cry together. You share stories, trials, triumphs, and talk about gear and food (yes!). You become family. You will meet friends for life. Oh yes there will be REALLY tough times. But the journey itself and what it will teach about you and about others outweighs it all.
marty1983
12-09-2011, 01:21
This is a great post. I am in the exact same boat, I am really excited about my upcoming thru but several times a day I ask myself "what the hell am I doing"? I just got married about 2 months ago and now I'm leaving my new wife who I love dearly for 6 months...the feeling sux but she is really supportive and knows that I must give it my best. I agree with the person who said having someone at home who is supportive helps. My goal is not to hike the entire AT. Rather I have about 25 smaller and easier to reach goals that if all met, the end result will be having hiked the entire trail in 2012. I hope this works as I have no experience whatsoever hiking or camping like this and I am not in the best shape of my life. One goal at a time. Good luck to you and maybe I will see you out there!
Marty
rjhouser
12-09-2011, 02:10
I'm 22 and I second guess myself every day about my upcoming thru. All I have known is school, I'll be graduating college early May. When I feel like I'm over-thinking it, I just try to reassure myself that this is it. It's going to be now or never. If I quit, I'm officially "unemployed" and I have never been unemployed in my life. I'm nervous and I think that's normal... but this is going to be one of the greatest adventures of my life. Brian from Trek nailed it when he said if you quit, you can return to the warm, loving home and see all those people you missed and eat awesome dinners and have all the luxuries, but if you stick it out, you will return to those same people, that same home, that same welcoming, but will have conquered your dream. No regrets. That's what I'm trying to instill in my mind for motivation. Hope that helps.
Ric Hamel
12-09-2011, 02:42
Ditto to all of the anxiety....I hope it's gone by the time I hit Springer in February.......
stranger
12-09-2011, 09:14
Heya try not to sweat it...but you probably will anyhow. Change is something that is both very easy, and quite challenging. The problem with change, at least major change, for most people is that they never get enough practice for it to get easy. So even something like a thru-hike, which requires a decent change process, is usually (not always) a once in a lifetime thing. One or two big changes won't shake off the 'play it safe' approach to life that we are ingrained with since birth, especially in America. A thru-hike isn't a HUGE change, you quit your job and take a walk, and for most people it will be in the same country...it's fairly straightforward in many respects - but scary no doubt. This is a scary thing now, do it again and it becomes less, drive around the states for 3 months and even less scary, move across the world even less scary. I remember being sick to my stomach when I hiked the Long Trail in 1994, I was 18 and petrified! Nowdays, I'll move country on a whim, I will turn down a job if it has less than 5 weeks vacation without blinking, I just turned down a kick ass job staring in Feb cause they won't let me take off Aug/Sept to go hiking, screw em. There is nothing more rewarding than following your dreams instead of doing what everyone else is doing - chances are everyone else is living a fairly insignificant life, but admitting that would be counter intuative. If you want to hike the AT...go hike the AT. I haven't been making 'the responsible decisions' since 1995...trust me, it gets easier and easier. Honestly, you really can do what you want, you just have to understand the decision you are making and understand there are consequences to each decision. There IS ALWAYS a reason to not do something, ALWAYS. Dont' make excuses, make decisions. Wishing you well!
buff_jeff
12-09-2011, 09:37
hiking the trail is a very selfish venture, things will not be the same when you get back. there are gains and there are losses. what are u prepared to lose.
Why does everyone always say this? How is hiking the trail any more selfish than anything else we do?
I guess I'm not as excited about attempting a thru as I should be. Don't know if it's because I'm so old and have been down so many new roads before. I'm looking at it as something to keep be busy for five or six months next year. Whenever I get down and think about quiting the first thing I'll do is remember what I would be doing at home. Probably typing on Whiteblaze wishing I were hiking.
Old Boots
12-09-2011, 11:28
I am starting my hike on 2/18. As an older person I have had to think about this carefully aware that physically I am not the man I once was. However, mentally I feel like a 16 year old getting ready to drive the family car for the first time. My Dr. tells me that I am up for it. I have worked hard to prepare my body and mind (hiking miles a week with a 30 lb. pack).
My wife and children have slowly come to accept my decision. They worry that something could happen to me out there on the trail. I remind them that something could happen to me in my rocking chair. Will I make it? I don't know and that is part of the excitement. My goal is to put one foot in front of the other and see how far I get.
Good luck to all of you as you prepare yourselves for your hike. See you on the trail.
Old Boots
Slo-go'en
12-09-2011, 12:15
http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/images/Eloquent/miscgreen/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by kayak karl http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/images/Eloquent/buttonsgreen/viewpost-right.png (http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?p=1225534#post1225534)
hiking the trail is a very selfish venture, things will not be the same when you get back. there are gains and there are losses. what are u prepared to lose.
Why does everyone always say this? How is hiking the trail any more selfish than anything else we do?
Good question. Why would hiking the trail be any more selfish than most things we do in life? As for things not being the same when you get back - things will be exactly the same. How you view and deal with those things might be a lot different though.
Why does everyone always say this? How is hiking the trail any more selfish than anything else we do?
before commiting to go hiking in '12 i talked it over with someone that i respect dearly, a spiritual advisor if you will.. i told him that i was feeling selfish for leaving my 2 younger sisters ( who's father died 2 years ago), my room mate with all the bills on his plate, my job and everyone else who i play a vital role in their life. ( we all play vital roles in peoples lives). He told me that if I DIDN'T go it would be selfish. He put it to me this way, he said that an act is only selfish if people are harmed by the act. The end result of my hike will be positive, for me, my future and my family. Even if I fall in love with a small town along the way and never return to Florida, leaving this life behind, all will be well, for me and everyone i touch.. I believe that I am supposed to hike, everything in my life is pointing for me to go, if I ignore it because of fear, how ever rational or irrational it may, be there will be a price to pay.
bigcranky
12-10-2011, 09:16
It's natural to freak out. If you can find the Colin Fletcher book, The Complete Walker, read his description of "Fletcheritis" (and the appropriate cure...:) ) As your start date approaches, I expect you'll get even more excited and apprehensive, and it's all normal. Once you hit the trail, just take it one day, one mile, one footstep at a time, and you'll be fine.
Good luck.
Stats 2012
12-11-2011, 02:06
Ross, I hit the Trail 2 days after you and am feeling anxious, too. I'm relying on past experiences to give me confidence. A journey of 2,000 miles begins with the first step; don't regret not taking it!
RossSFCA
12-12-2011, 02:31
Thank you to everyone who has responded. I am glad the post got some other folks thinking, too.
I hope I get to meet many of you on the Trail or at one of the big events along the way.
I am already beginning to get a sense of the community we share along the way.
Thank you so much!
Ross / DirtyGirl
RossSFCA
12-12-2011, 02:37
It's natural to freak out. If you can find the Colin Fletcher book, The Complete Walker, read his description of "Fletcheritis" (and the appropriate cure...:) )
HA! THAT IS GREAT! (I was seriously thinking about setting up my tent tonight inside my house and sleeping in it. How funny!)
Fletcheritis
An intense desire to be in the woods that borders on mania.
Symptoms include-
packing and re packing packs
pitching tents in the living room
reading and posting to this message board (and others)
taking trail guides to work to read on the toilet
cooking dinner on the camp stove
grocery shopping that includes "lipton noodles and sauce"
wearing hiking boots to work
drinking out of a Nalgene for no apparent reason
treatment
can be temporized with day hikes, but generally requires an overnight in the woods. a 4-5 month remission can be achieved with a week on the trail.
bigcranky
12-12-2011, 08:24
Hmmm, in his books Colin Fletcher described Fletcheritis and its cure somewhat differently. Fletcheritis is the sudden onset of physical symptoms just before a hike that causes one to want to cancel the hike. (Like the anxiety expressed in this thread.) As these symptoms are mostly from anxiety, the cure is somewhat simple, too. I'd recommend The Thousand Mile Summer and River as good books for a long pre-thru-hike winter. If you can find a first edition of The Complete Walker, get that too. The current 4th edition is fine, though it has two authors and sounds very different.
hiking the trail is a very selfish venture, things will not be the same when you get back. there are gains and there are losses. what are u prepared to lose.
I went through that feeling of selfishness but now that I'm done I think it was worth it. After almost 6 months away from family and home I feel the gains were greater than the loses. Karl I'd like to answer your question with a question; what are you prepared to gain?
Lone Wolf
12-12-2011, 09:06
what are you prepared to gain?weight. ya can't eat like you're still hikin'
Not going till 2014 but feel your pain. Just finished the book Appalachian Trials by Zack Davis. Deals with the mental side of the hike, pretty good book. Happy Trail and enjoy
MuddyWaters
03-02-2012, 21:36
After you start you will feel better.
The only things you will regret in life, are the things you didnt do.
get your hands on the book Appalachian Trials by Zach Davis. It's helped keep my mind focused and ready for my 2012 thru.
I have over a year until my start date and I'm psyching myself out! I may die of anxiety before I ever get to Georgia.
RichardD
03-08-2012, 23:10
Perhaps I can help reassure you but of course everyones situation, fears, fitness, motivation is different. My situation was that my family is raised and have families of their own, my house paid for and more than 45 years of work behind me. My wife and I are both retired.
There really is not much to be anxious about on the trail. You get up in the morning and perhaps, like me have a hot breakfast and coffee, socialise with other hikers for a while then go for a walk. Walk at you own pace, rest whenever you feel like it, enjoy the wondrous surroundings then when you feel like it find a place to camp for the night. If you choose to camp at a shelter there will be plenty of other hikers around. You will likely make lifelong friends with some of these hikers.
Set a simple goal, perhaps the next trail town, look forward to shower and clean clothes, food, more food perhaps a beer or two then more food. Call home, then if you are like me the next morning the flush toilets, hot shower etc have lost their appeal and you can't wait to get back to the simplicity of the trail. Then set the next trail town or hostel as your goal.
Remember six months is a very small part of a lifetime and the experience of a thru hike will be with you for a lifetime.
There will be times when you think its rough, perhaps too much rain, too much heat, too cold, too many bugs, too many rocks to climb over but dont let negative thoughts spoil your hike. Remember it will be sunny and warm tomorrow (if its not repeat the thought).
Of course not everyone has the favorable conditions at home that I had for my hike but most are much younger and their fitness improvement curve goes much further than mine did. (By the second half of the hike the 20 someting hikers had reached a level of fitness far beyond mine, however my level was plenty good enough to enjoy the entire trail at a somewhat slower pace)
I hope my ramblings help to reduce the anxieties.