YerbaJon
03-29-2005, 15:40
My father, an experienced woodsman, finally solved all of my Stove problems: a propane tank.
At first, I was shocked at his idea. Was he out of his mind?
"Dad, certainly you mean a small propane tank?".
"No. The big ones! They weight about 20 pounds."
That was it, he was out of his mind! At least that's what I thought, until I learned that I was the fool; I had become so consumed with weight that my mind had closed itself to the perfect trail solution.
His ultimate plan was perfect. It was more than just a stove! His final design satiates the strict ultra-light hikers' motto of dual use, perfectly satisfies the desire to share the experience, provides 100% accurate distance calculations, actually produces income on the trail, thus pays for itself, and cooks one hell-of-a meal!
Personally, for my family and myself, we will be rich. Everyone will want one. I have spent the last few nights practically unable to sleep with the excitement of my pending riches. Again, however, my Dad proved the more experienced hiker.
"Son, in the spirit of freedom and trail magic, the designs must be shared with all. Ask for nothing, expect nothing; only then will you have everything."
In honor of my father's (Gee's) request, here is Gee's Ultimate Trail Stove (GUTS):
Mount a 20lb. propane tank onto 2 solid wheelbarrow tires.
Install a pedometer onto the tires.
Wrap the tank in solar panneling.
Mount a movie camera facing backwards (IMPORTANT: Use digital camera with new technology that eliminates shaking of image).
Install your choice of stove onto top of butane tank.
Operation instructions:
Start camera and pull.
Sell butane to hikers in need at above market value.
"Son, the benefits are priceless. Best of all,when you are done, you will be able to play the movie backwards and people will be able to walk the entire trail without ever having to leave their living room."
The man has GUTS.
At first, I was shocked at his idea. Was he out of his mind?
"Dad, certainly you mean a small propane tank?".
"No. The big ones! They weight about 20 pounds."
That was it, he was out of his mind! At least that's what I thought, until I learned that I was the fool; I had become so consumed with weight that my mind had closed itself to the perfect trail solution.
His ultimate plan was perfect. It was more than just a stove! His final design satiates the strict ultra-light hikers' motto of dual use, perfectly satisfies the desire to share the experience, provides 100% accurate distance calculations, actually produces income on the trail, thus pays for itself, and cooks one hell-of-a meal!
Personally, for my family and myself, we will be rich. Everyone will want one. I have spent the last few nights practically unable to sleep with the excitement of my pending riches. Again, however, my Dad proved the more experienced hiker.
"Son, in the spirit of freedom and trail magic, the designs must be shared with all. Ask for nothing, expect nothing; only then will you have everything."
In honor of my father's (Gee's) request, here is Gee's Ultimate Trail Stove (GUTS):
Mount a 20lb. propane tank onto 2 solid wheelbarrow tires.
Install a pedometer onto the tires.
Wrap the tank in solar panneling.
Mount a movie camera facing backwards (IMPORTANT: Use digital camera with new technology that eliminates shaking of image).
Install your choice of stove onto top of butane tank.
Operation instructions:
Start camera and pull.
Sell butane to hikers in need at above market value.
"Son, the benefits are priceless. Best of all,when you are done, you will be able to play the movie backwards and people will be able to walk the entire trail without ever having to leave their living room."
The man has GUTS.