How do you coat your balls with petroleum jelly?

[sir limpsalot]

I have to do it when my wife's not home (she wouldn't understand, and it's messy!).

OK, so maybe I missed the class on this (busy studying up on how to pull the cardboard tube out of the TP), but I just decided to try the idea of "petroleum jelly soaked cotton balls" for a fire starter.

The two items ain't compatable in their natural state! HOW DO YOU MAKE THESE THINGS! I tried melting the petroleum jelly in a pan and dipping the cotton balls....but this seems like alot of work. Got an easier way?

[juma]

just rub them in it. they don't have to saturated to start a fire. they will get more saturated after they are put in a baggy with more jelly.

[tnvarmint]

Ok I was very scared to read this at first...WOW

I typically just throw some cotton balls in a bag and then scoop in some vaseline, then seal the bag and mash em both together. That being said I don't know if it was from the off brand of vaseline that I used or what, but the last batch I made would barely burn. Never had this problem in the past.

[fredmugs]

Do you also write headlines for Yahoo News!

[Gray Blazer]

I would wait for your wife to get home.

[Rasty]

The best thread title in the history of Whiteblaze! Well done sir!

[Drybones]

I have to do it when my wife's not home (she wouldn't understand, and it's messy!).

OK, so maybe I missed the class on this (busy studying up on how to pull the cardboard tube out of the TP), but I just decided to try the idea of "petroleum jelly soaked cotton balls" for a fire starter.

The two items ain't compatable in their natural state! HOW DO YOU MAKE THESE THINGS! I tried melting the petroleum jelly in a pan and dipping the cotton balls....but this seems like alot of work. Got an easier way?

This post had me really wondering when I read the thread title...glad it went in another direction.

[atmilkman]

The best thread title in the history of Whiteblaze! Well done sir!
At first I thought I can't believe somebody actually started a thread like that and got away with it.

[Tipi Walter]

I have to do it when my wife's not home (she wouldn't understand, and it's messy!).

OK, so maybe I missed the class on this (busy studying up on how to pull the cardboard tube out of the TP), but I just decided to try the idea of "petroleum jelly soaked cotton balls" for a fire starter.

The two items ain't compatable in their natural state! HOW DO YOU MAKE THESE THINGS! I tried melting the petroleum jelly in a pan and dipping the cotton balls....but this seems like alot of work. Got an easier way?

The balls I have come with a natural emollient whereby no rubbing or smearing is needed and yet they will flame up with no problem. These are the same balls I have at home and the same used in the field. They will start a fire in the wettest conditions and boy I needed them a couple weeks ago. I like to store my balls in a codpiece-shaped container for camp use as this keeps their gooey residue off my other equipment.

[hikerboy57]

At first I thought I can't believe somebody actually started a thread like that and got away with it.

should change screen name to sir chafesalot

[Tipi Walter]

At first I thought I can't believe somebody actually started a thread like that and got away with it.

Once Alligator finds it it'll be shut down soon enough.

[Rasty]

Once Alligator finds it it'll be shut down soon enough.

Most likely! But we at least got to view a true masterpiece while it lasts!

[Rasty]

Maybe this should be moved to the health and safety category!

[Starrgazer]

I've actually tried dipping cotton rounds in some leftover wax and using those. I did a couple tests with them, and I got half of the circle to burn for over 15 mins with a decent size flame. They're alot easier to coat and make, plus you don't have to explain to your wife why you're coating your balls with PJ.

[4Bears]

Do you also write headlines for Yahoo News!

Still chuckling...

[4Bears]

You can melt the PJ and also add a little parafin wax, you will end up with a longer burn.

[treesloth]

I would wait for your wife to get home.

haha! Great advice. I'd have recommended the same thing.

[Slo-go'en]

Melt the jelly on your balls with a hair drier. Just be careful not to set them afire.

[ATMountainTime]

This is a great idea, its probably a good thing i didn't learn this in Jr High School or i would have gone blind.

[Malto]

The best thread title in the history of Whiteblaze! Well done sir!

+1 says the childish adult.

[daddytwosticks]

Man, I'm crying so hard from laughing! This was the best post yet! :) :) :)

[Alligator]

I coat my balls when ridin'...



Bikes that is.


For hikin' I just stick my balls in the container and roll each one around. (It's a big container). You could dip your balls in hot wax but I have not tried that personally.

[MuddyWaters]

You dont want a lot of PJ, it will keep it from lighting easily.
With a little bit, you can light it with a spark from a firesteel.
With a lot, you cannot.
It doesnt need to burn for 10 min, 1 min or so is good. It just needs to light easy, and to burn for a short while.

[topshelf]

I use cotton swabs, leave them whole or cut in half, that way you can hold the stick and keep hands clean

[SOBO_Pace]

I coat my balls when ridin'...



Bikes that is.


For hikin' I just stick my balls in the container and roll each one around. (It's a big container). You could dip your balls in hot wax but I have not tried that personally.

I cannot quit laughing at this thread. My eyes are wayering, side hutrs, and I'm short of breath.
:)

[1azarus]

qi wiz told me to unroll the ball a bit, then put in a dab of petroleum jelly, then roll it back. works quite well. did recently learn not to try lighting the ball while holding it, planning to drop it onto an esbit cube. don't do that!!! sticky little critters....

[RED-DOG]

I use hand sanitizer with my balls it works great, just a little dab will do ya.

[hikerboy57]

qi wiz told me to unroll the ball a bit, then put in a dab of petroleum jelly, then roll it back. works quite well. did recently learn not to try lighting the ball while holding it, planning to drop it onto an esbit cube. don't do that!!! sticky little critters....

just a reminder to use pj and not pbj

[WingedMonkey]

I coat my balls when ridin'...



Bikes that is.

So did Lance Armstrong.

:p

[StylinLP38]

Thank you for losting this thread and asking. I was wondering the same thing myself. Now I see how its done.

BTW, his title is very accurate. Not his fault some have dirty minds lol
Also, people that only speak english as a third language would say things like this without knowing how it could be missinterpetted!

[Alligator]

So did Lance Armstrong.

:pJust ball in Lance's case.

[hikerboy57]

Thank you for losting this thread and asking. I was wondering the same thing myself. Now I see how its done.

BTW, his title is very accurate. Not his fault some have dirty minds lol
Also, people that only speak english as a third language would say things like this without knowing how it could be missinterpetted!
no - simple use of the word cotton would have sufficed.

[JaxHiker]

My co-workers are curious why I've been messing with my balls all day. They just don't understand. :(

Sent from my SkyRaider Thunderbolt.

[Alligator]

My co-workers are curious why I've been messing with my balls all day. They just don't understand. :(

Sent from my SkyRaider Thunderbolt.If you have already explained that you are out of Vasoline at home and that you are going to light your balls on fire while hiking, I am not sure what else you should tell them.

[WingedMonkey]

Just ball in Lance's case.

I should have put the word did in bold.

[Rasty]

Who was afraid to open this thread at work today?

[Alligator]

I should have put the word did in bold.Oh, it was a bit amballbiguous on this little screen, my bad!

[HikerMom58]

I should have put the word did in bold.

Become a donating member then you can!! :p

[Train Wreck]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bB5xL577r4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4bB5xL577r4

[SouthMark]

Coffee all over my screen and keyboard is not good!

[Wise Old Owl]

The best thread title in the history of Whiteblaze! Well done sir!


First you grab your scrotum........

[jimmyjam]

I use hand sanitizer with my balls it works great, just a little dab will do ya.
I'll bet it keeps 'em clean too, but man that's gotta tingle something awful!! HaHa this thread is the funniest I've seen in awhile.

[Wise Old Owl]

And that post is from Jimmy Jam - Welcome sir!

[Another Kevin]

qi wiz told me to unroll the ball a bit, then put in a dab of petroleum jelly, then roll it back. works quite well. did recently learn not to try lighting the ball while holding it, planning to drop it onto an esbit cube. don't do that!!! sticky little critters....

Petroleum jelly, another fine product from Napalmolive!

[Another Kevin]

just a reminder to use pj and not pbj

PB might work, there's a lot of oil in it, but leave out the J.

[Alligator]

So assuming this gets figured out and put to practice. There you are in the woods, you've got your wood tipi set up ready to strike. You could go old school, pull out your bow drill and get the fire started with a little friction. But maybe the wood is a little damp for some reason. You whip out your vaseline soaked balls from your sack or cup or whatever holds them in. If you haven't got the process right, one ball might be bigger than the other. Which ball do you handle first? Will the little one do it, the big one or do you just jam both in there since its damp?

[Wise Old Owl]

Well spoken sir.. well we are not that far apart on that process.... thank GOD you did not use spreadsheets and photos!

[Another Kevin]

Once Alligator finds it it'll be shut down soon enough.

Alligator found it - and posted in the thread. :banana (Uh-oh, balls and a banana!)

[HikerMom58]

Alligator found it - and posted in the thread. :banana (Uh-oh, balls and a banana!)

Better yet could you merge this thread with the wiener thread? LOL.. Another Kevin.. you made me laugh so hard on that other thread.

[Papa D]

Ha ha ha ha - fun post - i use dryer lint and parrafin wax for what it's worth - - it's true but if you think about it a bit it could be funny too

[Wise Old Owl]

This will not be topped for a long time.....

[rocketsocks]

So assuming this gets figured out and put to practice. There you are in the woods, you've got your wood tipi set up ready to strike. You could go old school, pull out your bow drill and get the fire started with a little friction. But maybe the wood is a little damp for some reason. You whip out your vaseline soaked balls from your sack or cup or whatever holds them in. If you haven't got the process right, one ball might be bigger than the other. Which ball do you handle first? Will the little one do it, the big one or do you just jam both in there since its damp?I use Char Cloth :D

[WingedMonkey]

Become a donating member then you can!! :p

Not necessary for using the ignore feature.

[hikerboy57]

i keep my balls in a separate sack.hand sanitizer has a high alcohol content and works fine iff squirted on the balls before use. hand lotion has a high petroleum and oil content and is excellent when used with balls and firestick,umm, matches.

[Wise Old Owl]

Is there second hand smoke?

[rocketsocks]

Not necessary for using the ignore feature.Damnmmmmmmm

[Waterbuffalo]

In all my time on here I can honestly say I have never laughed so hard.
Thank you

[Sly]

Not as prevalent as they used to be, 35mm film canisters are excellent containers for PJ cotton balls.

[Rasty]

Not as prevalent as they used to be, 35mm film canisters are excellent containers for PJ cotton balls.

Do the canisters come in blue?

[hikerboy57]

Do the canisters come in blue?if you couldnt get ablue one, would you take it in the brown?

[joshuasdad]

i keep my balls in a separate sack.hand sanitizer has a high alcohol content and works fine iff squirted on the balls before use. hand lotion has a high petroleum and oil content and is excellent when used with balls and firestick,umm, matches.

If you don't keep the balls in the sack, do they get Schweddy?

[hikerboy57]

If you don't keep the balls in the sack, do they get Schweddy?

now that there is some serious cross thread drift.
refer to http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?86369-hikerboys-cyber-cafe/page939.post#18778

[HikerMom58]

Not necessary for using the ignore feature.

Obviously, you weren't taking full advantage of that feature. I suppose one could see that feature as a waste, then, unlike the edit feature.:cool:

[joshuasdad]

now that there is some serious cross thread drift.
refer to http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?86369-hikerboys-cyber-cafe/page939.post#18778

Oh, you beat me to it...

[Sarcasm the elf]

In case you are inept at making these things and are the kind of hiker that just doesn't have any balls, you can always just go to REI and buy a set.

http://www.rei.com/product/631077/coghlans-emergency-tinder

They only come in a 10 pack, so be prepared to have other hikers saying that you got a lot of balls paying $4.95 for tinder.

[One-8T]

The balls I have come with a natural emollient whereby no rubbing or smearing is needed and yet they will flame up with no problem. These are the same balls I have at home and the same used in the field. They will start a fire in the wettest conditions and boy I needed them a couple weeks ago. I like to store my balls in a codpiece-shaped container for camp use as this keeps their gooey residue off my other equipment.

How has this not been commented on? I agree the thread as a whole is the best in a long time, but the quote above is simply a work of art. Not even sure if it was meant to have so many innuendos, but reading it that way makes it a superb addition to the thread. Well done.

[sir limpsalot]

In case you are inept at making these things and are the kind of hiker that doesn't have any balls, you can always just go to REI and buy a set. They only come 10 pack, so be prepared to have other hikers tell you that you've got a lot of balls to pay $4.95 for tinder


To be honest, I've really wanted to be an ept, I just wasn't sure I had the balls for it. I eventually packed it in and realized I needed to get a grip. I mean, how hard could it be to impregnate some cotton balls? I figure I can handle it. I know this is slippery business, but I was just lookin to take my Back Country Boiler out for a weekend trip down the trail with the comfort of well lubed cotton balls to light my fire. I feel better now, more relaxed about the experience.

[Sarcasm the elf]

To be honest, I've really wanted to be an ept, I just wasn't sure I had the balls for it. I eventually packed it in and realized I needed to get a grip. I mean, how hard could it be to impregnate some cotton balls? I figure I can handle it. I know this is slippery business, but I was just lookin to take my Back Country Boiler out for a weekend trip down the trail with the comfort of well lubed cotton balls to light my fire. I feel better now, more relaxed about the experience.

Glad to hear it, and I think this thread has helped a lot of people along the way!

[OzJacko]

Laughed so hard had to take 3 attempts to read all this thread.

For what it's worth, alternative is to take up tea drinking.
Use teabags.
Dry day befores bags on back of pack during day.
Two drops of alcohol and you have a fire starter that meets "dual use" guidelines....:D

[Sarcasm the elf]

Laughed so hard had to take 3 attempts to read all this thread.

For what it's worth, alternative is to take up tea drinking.
Use teabags.
Dry day befores bags on back of pack during day.
Two drops of alcohol and you have a fire starter that meets "dual use" guidelines....:D

Understood, tea bagging is always an alternative.

[OzJacko]

Understood, tea bagging is always an alternative.
AAAAHHHH Damn it!
You got the lack of drift...:banana

[surfnturk]

I typically get my wife to do it, you know, since she's down there anyway

[jimmyjam]

I typically get my wife to do it, you know, since she's down there anyway
I'll have to try that, but first I'll make sure her fingers are warm.

[Coffee Rules!]

Holy ***** what a thread to cyber walk into first! Balls down, this is the funniest thread I've seen on here. Every time I read something and thought of a kicka*s reply, sure enough I scrolled down and found out that someone had already beaten me to the punch.

THANK YOU ALL for the laughs, and thanks to Sir Chafesnomore for starting it with the best thread title of any message board/forum I've ever been on.

[mrcoffeect]

HA cotton balls: those are so 1970's. it a new age. I use high tec synthetic light weight quick drying spandex balls. get with the times people, cotton kills. :rolleyes:

[mrcoffeect]

Just to put it out there,my above post was not meant to offend anybody that actually has the medical condition "cotton balls". as i know that those that do have this condition tend to be thin skined.

[hikerboy57]

HA cotton balls: those are so 1970's. it a new age. I use high tec synthetic light weight quick drying spandex balls. get with the times people, cotton kills. :rolleyes:

youre kidding right?
spandex is sooooo 80s.
cuben fiber balls is the way to go.

[RCBear]

I prefer Gold Bond...

[Rasty]

youre kidding right?
spandex is sooooo 80s.
cuben fiber balls is the way to go.

Are cuben fiber balls tear resistant?

[hikerboy57]

Are cuben fiber balls tear resistant?

i really hope so

[Tipi Walter]

Are cuben fiber balls tear resistant?

Cuben balls are a poor choice due to the back and forth abrasion commonly encountered on a backpacking trip. After a full day of jostling there will be little ball coating left for the evening fire. Some of us who regularly backpack up "nutbuster" climbs like the Upper Slickrock or going north out of Stecoah Gap have found our balls to be completely rubbed away and so we sit sacless at day's end. So, I guess the best advice I can give to the newbs is to make sure your coated balls are strapped down tightly to avoid the wear and tear of constant movement so when you get to camp and are asked to start a fire you'll have a healthy set of slimy oily balls ready to ignite.

[mrcoffeect]

youre kidding right?
spandex is sooooo 80s.
cuben fiber balls is the way to go.
I do believe that the cuban fiber balls might be lighter, but i think that the spandex balls have a higher thermal output, wich give you more of a chance at a successful burning and or iching.

[mrcoffeect]

forgive my spelling on that last post i still have PJ all over my keyboard from a rough night of coating my spandex.

[Wise Old Owl]

Roasting Chestnuts on a open fire............

[HikerMom58]

Roasting Chestnuts on a open fire............

No don't go there... I had a hard time writing that last comment on the fire thread. I'm a her.

[Drybones]

In case you are inept at making these things and are the kind of hiker that just doesn't have any balls, you can always just go to REI and buy a set.

http://www.rei.com/product/631077/coghlans-emergency-tinder

They only come in a 10 pack, so be prepared to have other hikers saying that you got a lot of balls paying $4.95 for tinder.

$4.95 for 10 cotton balls, man, I'd expect brass ones for that price.

[Train Wreck]

Oh, good grief, people, why must you make such a big deal out of little things.
just soak your balls in nail polish remover, let them dry, and tuck them away till needed.
Pull them out, flick your lighter, done deal.


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaU

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaU

[Drybones]

How has this not been commented on? I agree the thread as a whole is the best in a long time, but the quote above is simply a work of art. Not even sure if it was meant to have so many innuendos, but reading it that way makes it a superb addition to the thread. Well done.

+1...I have developed new admiration and respect for Tipi...an artist indeed. His post reminds me of a friend I worked with years ago, had the dryest sense of humor but sometimes he'd put you rolling on the floor.

[Train Wreck]

+1...I have developed new admiration and respect for Tipi...an artist indeed. His post reminds me of a friend I worked with years ago, had the dryest sense of humor but sometimes he'd put you rolling on the floor.

I know, we'd enjoy him stopping by the cafe sometime if he ever comes in out of the cold :)

[Drybones]

Not as prevalent as they used to be, 35mm film canisters are excellent containers for PJ cotton balls.

Balls come in different sizes. I use the extra large ones to get the fire burning hot and fast. These will not fit in a film canister.

[atmilkman]

Oh, good grief, people, why must you make such a big deal out of little things.
just soak your balls in nail polish remover, let them dry, and tuck them away till needed.
Pull them out, flick your lighter, done deal.


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaU

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaU
Ain't no way I'm gonna soak my balls in nail polish remover. i sat on a 5 gal. can of Toulene one time with a nail hole in it and it shot right up on the back of the boys and it was all I could do to get my pants off and put the "fire" OUT!

[JaxHiker]

My boss said I can go home early so I'm really looking forward to playing with my balls this afternoon. I'd be concerned that cuben might be pretty noisy and might alert people around the shelter as to what I'm doing. And I'm not about to use hand sanitizer. That might burn too much. Then again, it's all about getting a good burn I suppose.

Good lubrication makes for happy balls. And happy balls keep you warm.

Sent from my SkyRaider Thunderbolt.

[Train Wreck]

Ain't no way I'm gonna soak my balls in nail polish remover. i sat on a 5 gal. can of Toulene one time with a nail hole in it and it shot right up on the back of the boys and it was all I could do to get my pants off and put the "fire" OUT!

Oh, man up.
It's all about achieving maximum burn with minimal effort. Petroleum jelly is for weenies :p

[atmilkman]

Oh, man up.
It's all about achieving maximum burn with minimal effort. Petroleum jelly is for weenies :p
Man, I got up, I got up real quick. Maximum burn had been achieved.

[Train Wreck]

Man, I got up, I got up real quick. Maximum burn had been achieved.

I'd love to have seen the OSHA report for that one!

[Sarcasm the elf]

Oh, good grief, people, why must you make such a big deal out of little things.just soak your balls in nail polish remover, let them dry, and tuck them away till needed. Pull them out, flick your lighter, done deal.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaUhttp://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_yWyBjDEaUTW, I thought we had been over this before, nail polish remover has NO place on the trail, especially when it involves cooking fires!!http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?90453-Worst-Meal-You-ve-Ever-Cooked-On-the-Trail/page2&p=1373508#post1373508

[atmilkman]

I'd love to have seen the OSHA report for that one!
It was on a construction site at the Palm Beach International Airport. We were eating lunch in and around the tool shed. I sat on that bucket, felt the wetness, then felt the "burn" and it was as fast as I could run over to the water hose, drop my pants and start rinsing. People were driving by heading into the terminal blowing their horns and the guys were laughing like hell. I was young and cussing like mad threatening to kill them all.

[RedBeerd]

Skipped a few pages and if I can get a serious answer..what are the advantages to these gooey balls? Just inexpensive to make a bunch?

[Train Wreck]

TW, I thought we had been over this before, nail polish remover has NO place on the trail, especially when it involves cooking fires!!http://www.whiteblaze.net/forum/showthread.php?90453-Worst-Meal-You-ve-Ever-Cooked-On-the-Trail/page2&p=1373508#post1373508

Can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen :rolleyes:

[Coffee Rules!]

Skipped a few pages and if I can get a serious answer..

Okay, who has Serious Answer Duty today?

[HikerMom58]

Okay, who has Serious Answer Duty today?

No way, no way... he can't be serious!

[Rasty]

Skipped a few pages and if I can get a serious answer..

Okay, who has Serious Answer Duty today?

Tipi Walters

[jimmyjam]

Oh, man up.
It's all about achieving maximum burn with minimal effort. Petroleum jelly is for weenies :p

PJ for weenies? Now that's a whole 'nother thread. I thought we we're talking about PJ for balls.

[Prop Blast]

If you don't mind spending the money, you can get someone else to do your balls. Some Brazilian salons even use wax rather than PJ.

[jimmyjam]

If you don't mind spending the money, you can get someone else to do your balls. Some Brazilian salons even use wax rather than PJ.

Wow OUCH !!!!!! Don't even want to think about it!!!

[treesloth]

You sickos. I love it. This thread is definitely going to give the Sex on the Trail thread a serious run for its money.

[WingedMonkey]

There is no need to do your balls at home. There are always trail angels on the AT that are more than happy to take care of your balls for you.

[Sarcasm the elf]

Skipped a few pages and if I can get a serious answer..what are the advantages to these gooey balls? Just inexpensive to make a bunch?
Okay, who has Serious Answer Duty today?Okay, I'll take serious answer duty today: PJ cotton balls, or any other combination of flammable petroleum and a paper or cotton wick creates a a tinder that is compact, long burning, and can light reliably in wet conditions. The cotton ball ones seem to be the most popular, but I have also made many of them by filling the bottom half of an cardboard egg carton with sawdust and paraffin wax (makes 12 pieces, one from each egg holder), I have even used toilet paper and bug spray to make a firestarter that worked when everything had been rained on for several days.

[surfnturk]

There is no need to do your balls at home. There are always trail angels on the AT that are more than happy to take care of your balls for you.

I believe there's every reason in the world to do your balls at home! (or the beach, the mall, etc)

[treesloth]

Okay, I'll take serious answer duty today: PJ cotton balls, or any other combination of flammable petroleum and a paper or cotton wick creates a a tinder that is compact, long burning, and can light reliably in wet conditions. The cotton ball ones seem to be the most popular, but I have also made many of them by filling the bottom half of an cardboard egg carton with sawdust and paraffin wax (makes 12 pieces, one from each egg holder), I have even used toilet paper and bug spray to make a firestarter that worked when everything had been rained on for several days.

I was so desperate to get a fire going one morning after waking up near hypothermic, I sacrificed my alky ration by dumping it on a pile of sticks and lighting that sucker ablaze. Yup, two things that morning I just couldn't do fast enough - dig a cathole and get a fire lit. Not necessarily in that order. It was not my best start to a day on a trail.

[Furlough]

Do the canisters come in blue?

Not sure but I have heard that balls sometimes do.

[hauptman]

I totally had a different idea when I read the thread title. Just shows my gutter mind at work. That said, I recommend injecting the petroleum into them and then letting it work through from the inside-out.

[HikerMom58]

There is no need to do your balls at home. There are always trail angels on the AT that are more than happy to take care of your balls for you.

Seriously WM? In ur dreams, maybe... the only thing the trail angels, I know, would do is bust um. I think ur confused.... think hot groupies. You'll have more luck with that kind of "help". :p

[OzJacko]

Seriously WM? In ur dreams, maybe... the only thing the trail angels, I know, would do is bust um. I think ur confused.... think hot groupies. You'll have more luck with that kind of "help". :p
Anyone who takes care of your balls on trail is an angel though...

[JAK]

This is a bit hard core but you could use a retort and char your balls.
Just don't overtighten the lid. Been there done that.

[surfnturk]

This is a bit hard core but you could use a retort and char your balls.
Just don't overtighten the lid. Been there done that.

Ouch! i hate the smell of singed hair

[Another Kevin]

Does the petroleum-jelly-on-cotton-ball actually work all that much better than a gloop of hand sanitizer and a sheet of toilet paper?

[hikerboy57]

Does the petroleum-jelly-on-cotton-ball actually work all that much better than a gloop of hand sanitizer and a sheet of toilet paper?
yes it burns longer than alcohol based hand sanitizer. i just find its easier to just bring a big wad of cotton(which i save from vitamins, advil,etc in a small plastic baggie inside my first aid bag, and i bring sanitizer anyway . you do need to use more of it,

[NerdyJohn]

If you pack a full sized Bic, that will trump the need for saturated balls every time, even during the wettest of conditions.

The Bic is always ready for as many reuses as needed. Just grip firmly, create a couple of sparks, and bingo! When you are finally satisfied with the results, just let it cool for just a bit and put it back where it belongs until needed again. It packs cleanly, and as a bonus, you can share your Bic with a friend in need. What hiker, male or female, doesn’t know what to do with a Bic, even if it’s one of those tiny ones? It’s so intuitive, no explanation is ever necessary. Use it left handed or right handed, it doesn't matter. It's the first thing I check when I'm preparing to hike. I never hike without mine.

For the record, I still carry some well saturated balls. It just seems like the right thing to do. You never know what will happen out there on the trail…

[Wise Old Owl]

Nice one NerdyJohn!

[Coffee Rules!]

So NerdyJohn would rather flick his Bic than play with his balls. Noted.

[Wise Old Owl]

So NerdyJohn would rather flick his Bic than play with his balls. Noted.


That can cause sudden death! Haven't you heard? read more here.
http://www.yourtango.com/2013172728/weird-news-when-self-love-almost-kills-you

[HikerMom58]

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash4/484836_201262940016541_1778266862_n.jpg

Oh yeah.. we knew this already ;)