Originally Posted by Penn-J
"Sometimes you've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" B. Springsteen
What's most important to you in a partner? How would you feel about someone who was perfect EXCEPT she didn't enjoy the outdoors? Is that a trainwreck because you spend every minute of spare time in the hills, or acceptable because the outdoors are an occasional outlet rather than your life?
I would like to think that someone who was perfect EXCEPT she didn't enjoy the outdoors would work for me but it just hasn't yet.
And the outdoors IS my life. Just because I'm not on a trail, doesn't mean I'm not moved by natural beauty, enjoying the wind, the rainy day, the sky, the coldness of winter. When I go for a bike ride, or go for a run, or just walking to my car sometimes, I'm still tapping into that "oneness with everything" feeling you get when thru hiking or weekend trips.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, how can I be with someone who doesn't feel that?
"The wind that blows, is all that anybody knows"
Thoreau
.
I grew up hunting, fishing, trapping, running cross country, smoking dope, and drinking. I married a girl that had never hunted, fished, trapped, run cross country, smoked dope, or drank. When it came to the honeymoon planning, I wanted to go to Tahiti and she wanted to go to Disney World. We went to Disney World. My marriage is bliss. Coming up on 30 years. Today neither of us hunt or trap or drink or smoke pot. I took on a few of her interests and she took on a few of mine. I still do some things she will never do and vise versa. I would put her fishing skills up against any of you. Marry a person, not a list of activities. If the person is not more important than the activity, stay single.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. - Abraham Lincoln
Husband,Wife, Friend or Alone?
Who are people we have sex with , Alex.
My wife (of 32 years now) isn't fond of backpacking. She'll go canoeing - since most of the gear is just stowed. For portages, she'll make an exception to the "no gear on my back" rule. But, that's about it.
I hike, sea kayak, bike, snow shoe, and xc ski, but with friends, or solo. No problem
Naturlred needs to define his terms. "Hiking" with someone or solo is vastly different than "Backpacking". Many people consider hiking to be dayhiking, the bane of backpacking and its opposite.
There are Two Women we have to placate: Miss Nature and the Wife. Hope to god you found someone female and human who can put up with long periods of alone time while you're out in the woods. Hope she has family nearby. And hope to Odin that when you come back home after 3 weeks in the mountains she's still there and not in someone else's bed.
As for Miss Nature, well, she's a hungry jealous Woman of the Wind and will both love you when you sleep with her and end up crushing you and taking all your gear. Both are needed. You could say hello to Her on Day 1 with an eager countenance and come out on Day 21 with a ken doll crotch. She's the one we most need to impress but it's only because we're neanderthals at heart and have 200,000 years of sleeping with her. Even human wimmin are cro magnons at root---we are mammals and animals first.
Riding in cars as rolling couch potatoes and drooling over indoor thermostats and ad nauseam-tweeting while focusing on Kardashian's butt are all temporary modern constructs foreign to our paleolithic roots.
She gets her innings. Two weeks of a yoga retreat in Jamaica while I'm dealing with endless blizzards in Boston.
Day hikes with my Wife are great; multi-day packing with a friend or two is fun but solo works for me too. I like exploring.
I hike alone most of the time. I have hiked with family and friends before but we are usually different hiking speeds (either I am too slow or they are) and that throws a wrench into everything. Especially if I feel they need attention while on the trail. I am a pretty independent guy when on the trail though so YMMV.
HYOH
Hmmm....who do I like hiking with?
I can't help but notice child or grandchild is missing from the list of choices. So far I've backpacked with grandson, son, friends, and total strangers that became friends. I've hiked with grandsons, sons, friends and my husband. I've completely enjoyed it all - even with the occasional mishap (or business as usual). I look forward to my first solo backpacking soon, and then I hope "All of the above" will be my response.
"Maybe life isn't about avoiding the bruises. Maybe it's about collecting the scars to prove we showed up for it."
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
