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  1. #61
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    Go pick him up and drive him directly to the U.S. Marine Corp recruiting station. Maybe they can make a man out of him.

    OkeefenokeeJoe

  2. #62
    Registered User Venchka's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OkeefenokeeJoe View Post
    Go pick him up and drive him directly to the U.S. Marine Corp recruiting station. Maybe they can make a man out of him.

    OkeefenokeeJoe
    Bingo!
    Obviously, the "preparation" should have included at least 3 weeks on the AT or similar trail. The weather hasn't even been particularly bad.
    The final outcome will be interesting.

    Wayne
    Eddie Valiant: "That lame-brain freeway idea could only be cooked up by a toon."
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  3. #63
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    y'all are whinin' weenies

  4. #64
    279.6 Miler (Tanyard Gap) CamelMan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dogwood View Post
    Ohh, BS.
    Maybe. Which is the excuse and which is the real desire? When have you quit something you've truly wanted to do? You've found ways to persevere, haven't you? So I don't think it's unfair to question whether or not he really wants to hike the trail.

    Nobody has to encourage me to try to hike again. On the contrary, they should tell me if they don't think it's the right time or reason. In which case I'll have to decide what's right for my journey, but nobody is going to teach me that by pushing me into something one way or another.

    Playing Devil's advocate, with everybody egging him on, maybe this person needs to find the courage to quit. I'll leave him with some inspirational quotes:

    "Quitting is leading too." -- Nelson Mandela
    "Retreat, Hell! We're just attacking in another direction." -- General Oliver Pierce Smith
    "Quitting law school was the most difficult decision of my life. But I felt this great relief that this is my life and I can do what I want with it." -- Carly Fiorina

    Last edited by CamelMan; 05-04-2016 at 23:02.

  5. #65
    Registered User Venchka's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lone Wolf View Post
    y'all are whinin' weenies
    Who? Me?
    My vote is for the USMC AT Prep Course.

    Wayne
    Eddie Valiant: "That lame-brain freeway idea could only be cooked up by a toon."
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  6. #66
    Registered User kythruhiker's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greenlight View Post
    F'n A, dude, I was thinking the same thing! But we gotta get this kid out of his head and back on the trail.
    Are we that far gone as a society that we think we need to mollycoddle some youngster (I'm presuming it's a youngster) and convince them they need to walk, maybe offer up some gold stars or a "I finished" medal? For the love of all that is Lone Wolf, it's ONLY WALKING. He either will or he won't, the trail will go on, as will his life.

  7. #67
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    My Rules for Quitting a Thru-Hike (which rules I did not create, by the way) included spending at least two days in town, which he has already done.

    The Rules also allowed me to spend two weeks at home, and then go back to hiking, without it being considered (by me) "quitting." At the lowest point of my hike I went home for four days.

    Why not pick him up? He'll either regret quitting, or not. There are lots of other things he can do with the time and money saved, many of which he may find more rewarding.

    Best wishes to you all.
    If not NOW, then WHEN?

    ME>GA 2006
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  8. #68

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    Ok to quit if not having fun.

    Will they regret it? Maybe.
    Depends on why they wanted to hike in first place.
    That can be a very personal issue, or quite flippant one.

    Weve got ingrained in us since kids " not to be a quitter"
    "Quitters never win, and winners never quit"

    No one ever said that applies to vacations

    You havent quit....until you quit trying and give up.
    Retreating to repair, regroup, and change tactics isnt quitting, its strategy.
    Sometimes the best one.

    This is why many are successful on secondary or greater attempts.
    Last edited by MuddyWaters; 05-04-2016 at 23:37.

  9. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by Water Rat View Post
    If you go pick him up, will it be used against you as the reason why he did not finish?
    He asked you to not pick him up, which means he was worried he might falter. If you pick him up, you risk fall-out. Personally, If I made a friend promise to support me in a certain manner, I would be disappointed and feel alienated if that friend went against my wishes.

    Regarding the other hikers, my guess is he was with a group that pulled ahead. That is no big deal, as he can find another group to join if he gets back on the trail!

    If he gets off, he will always regret it and, possibly, blame YOU because YOU promised to not give up on him - meaning you wouldn't count him a failure and take him off the trail....

  10. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by gsingjane View Post
    Hello Suzy - please forgive the presumptions inherent in my post. If you read anything that helps, that's great and if not, the last thing I would want to do is cause any more hurt.

    I am getting the very strong feeling from your post that the hiker in question is either your son, or a step-son, or someone in that position to you. This is such a hard thing! You want to support and love and care for him, but you also want to do the right thing - and you're having such a hard time figuring out what that might be.

    I will share with you a bit of insight that I have gained, not from dealing with a thru-hiker son, but a son that has grieved my heart pretty sorely for some time now. That is, as parents we are programmed to hurt when our kids hurt. We feel it is "our job" to fix things, to "make it all better," to save them some of the same pain and heart-ache that has come our way.

    We want to save our children pain because - it hurts to look at them in pain and we want to save ourselves that pain, too. But, in saving someone from pain, you are also depriving him of the chance to grow. One thing that I try and remember every day is that everyone deserves the opportunity to work things out for him or herself. Yes, that will have pain associated with it and it will be extremely tough to look at it sometimes. And of course, we aren't cruel or uncaring about it, and we don't make things unnecessarily difficult. But we also permit our loved ones to experience the consequences of their decisions.

    My heart aches for you because I can imagine having exactly the same thoughts and feelings as you, in this or a similar situation. I can completely understand the impulse to drive up there and try to make it better for him, help him work it out. But, perhaps consider that, if you do that at this particular juncture, you may also be depriving him of a significant opportunity to experience personal growth. Well, FWIW!

    Jane in CT
    This was so eloquently written! My thoughts, exactly!!!

  11. #71
    •Completed A.T. Section Hike GA to ME 1996 thru 2003 •Donating Member Skyline's Avatar
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    It's only early May. True, the hikers in Georgia or just entering North Carolina right now are near the end of the Class of 2016, but no way is he alone out there. There may be other real or perceived reasons to quit, but not having other hikers around for socializing and support isn't one of them. This is the AT. Except in deepest winter, you're not likely to be alone for very long.

  12. #72

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    Some of you are fooling yourselves...and supporting lame excuses for quitting.

    Read the opening post again. Two wks into a planned NOBO AT thru-hike...meaning he started right within the spring thru-hiker rush during a stretch of decent weather in late April well within the AT NOBO Thru-hiker crowd. He's supposedly hiking at a fast pace but if he's averaging 15 MPD he's right there amongst the avg MPD for a NOBO AT thru-hiker hiking themselves into shape...emotionally, physically and mentally. He's barely gotten his trail legs and likely isn't in thru-hiker mode with MUCH new to him as he finds ways adopting to a new life. Of course, he's struggling. Reality is setting in! No more prepping from behind a keyboard or reading a book on LD backpacking. Much planning and research has been done pre hike. STOP listening to opinions of people who haven't personally experienced AT thru-hiking! Specific detailed instructions were previously communicated, "do not get me if I call you, do not let me quit!" According to the loved one, the OP, this is his dream.

    Are you kidding me? THESE ARE LAME EXCUSES ALL RATHER EASILY SOLVABLE, "He feels he started too late and cannot find anyone moving at a quick pace to keep him company"... EVEN IF THEY WERE TRUE!

    Here's reality. Dreams are dime a dozen. They are usually just another word for fantasizing. As LW says so tersely the fantasy is now becoming reality. Sounds harsh but truth sometimes hurts. Executing to attain dreams is no longer fantasy. He's currently experiencing GROWING PAINS, emotional and mental ones, in making the dreams real.

    Let him be. Don't pick him up to drive him home. Inspire. Uplift. Don't be cruel but also see through these lame excuses.

  13. #73

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    Quote Originally Posted by CamelMan View Post
    Maybe. Which is the excuse and which is the real desire? When have you quit something you've truly wanted to do? You've found ways to persevere, haven't you? So I don't think it's unfair to question whether or not he really wants to hike the trail.

    Nobody has to encourage me to try to hike again. On the contrary, they should tell me if they don't think it's the right time or reason. In which case I'll have to decide what's right for my journey, but nobody is going to teach me that by pushing me into something one way or another.

    Playing Devil's advocate, with everybody egging him on, maybe this person needs to find the courage to quit. I'll leave him with some inspirational quotes:

    "Quitting is leading too." -- Nelson Mandela
    "Retreat, Hell! We're just attacking in another direction." -- General Oliver Pierce Smith
    "Quitting law school was the most difficult decision of my life. But I felt this great relief that this is my life and I can do what I want with it." -- Carly Fiorina

    I know lame lame thru-hiking quitting excuses when I hear them!

    I also know I wouldn't mistakenly use that Nelson Mandela or General Oliver Pierce quote out of context of the lives they purposed to live or their situations or other actions to support lame arse quitting...quitting of anything.

    Nelson Mandela also said AND PROVED he would walk his talk countless times:
    “I am fundamentally an optimist. Whether that comes from nature or nurture, I cannot say. Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun, one’s feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity(in his self too, read his memoirs) was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lays defeat and death.”

    "There is no easy walk to freedom anywhere, and many of us will have to pass through the valley of the shadow of death again and again before we reach the mountaintop of our desires.”
    “There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.”

    I have that last Mandela quote written in many a trail journal.

    And let us not forget even after being imprisoned 27 yrs in a cruel system perhaps his greatest display of character to walk the Long Walk was not succumbing to bitterness and hatred.

    General Pierce, commanding a force of 30,ooo in the Korean War, made that statement quoted facing Chinese forces numbering in excess of 110,000 charged with exterminating "The Chosin Few" in the Battle of the Chosin Reservoir. The Chosin Few didn't retreat with their tails between their legs. They didn't call to be "picked up!" NO, they had a strategy. First, they fought their way out from commanding superior numbers. Then, as they retreated they inflicted severe significant casualties to their enemies.

    Carly Fiorina I know nothing about other than some say she is a sharp biz woman. To me she obviously held her own on a political stage with some very powerful and connected figures.

  14. #74
    Registered User egilbe's Avatar
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    Double post
    Last edited by egilbe; 05-05-2016 at 06:28.

  15. #75
    Registered User egilbe's Avatar
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  16. #76

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    It's official, this thread has ran it's course...

  17. #77

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    Quote Originally Posted by Pedaling Fool View Post
    It's official, this thread has ran it's course...
    Whoops, should have typed its

  18. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by OkeefenokeeJoe View Post
    Go pick him up and drive him directly to the U.S. Marine Corp recruiting station. Maybe they can make a man out of him.

    OkeefenokeeJoe
    Wow.

    And who are you to comment on his manhood?

    He's really something just for even trying.
    Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing​ and rightdoing, there is a field. I'll meet you there. --Rumi

  19. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by OkeefenokeeJoe View Post
    Go pick him up and drive him directly to the U.S. Marine Corp recruiting station. Maybe they can make a man out of him.

    OkeefenokeeJoe
    What about the women Marines?

    Didja know that the Marines accept women?

    Tru story, bro - almost 100 years of service!

  20. #80
    Registered User DavidNH's Avatar
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    SuzyQ... how much of the trail has your family member done so far? what are his reasons for wanting to quit?

    if it is endless rain.. that will pass.. tell him/her to stick it out. In any case, if he/she is truly miserable... there is no point continuing to be miserable. I am a thru hiker my self (Springer to Katahdin in 184 days in 2006) and I can tell you that when the trip is over.. no one really cares that much how much you hiked or if you completed the trip. What ever glory there is is personal.

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