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  1. #21

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    Hike on a busy trail during a bubble. Seriously, I've met more awesome girls there than anywhere. Bonus- unless your mouth is sewn shut the trail provides the perfect ice breaker for any situation.

  2. #22

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    It seems all the woman I meet on the trail are either too young or married. Neither of those are a problem for me, but apparently it is for them.
    Follow slogoen on Instagram.

  3. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slo-go'en View Post
    It seems all the woman I meet on the trail are either too young or married. Neither of those are a problem for me, but apparently it is for them.
    ROFLMAO! No such thing as too young(must be over 18), only too married!

    Although, in the immortal words of Inspector Harry Callahan "A man's gotta know his limitations."

    The odds of a 45 year old meeting a partner in the bubble is pretty slim. Pretty much slim overall on the AT. The hardest thing for a 45 year old male to remember is that even a 30 year old gal is young enough to be his daughter...

    You get to be...55 and the odds of meeting a partner anytime on the AT is nearing....

  4. #24
    Registered User evyck da fleet's Avatar
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    Try backpacking and not hiking in your searches. A friend wrote a bot to show me results using 'hiking' and 90% were the one mile day hike types on Saturday. People like to exaggerate their hobbies to seem more interesting.

    I'm not sure why you can't try meetup and drop if you're schedule doesn't allow you to go. It sounds like there would be someone on a waitlist that could take your place with some notice.

  5. #25

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    Quote Originally Posted by evyck da fleet View Post
    Try backpacking and not hiking in your searches. A friend wrote a bot to show me results using 'hiking' and 90% were the one mile day hike types on Saturday. People like to exaggerate their hobbies to seem more interesting
    If you question the validity of this assessment check out the "Hikers" Facebook page. 99.999% of these hikers are no more than an hour from their vehicles.

    I was talking to a girl here for a while who talked about how much she liked hiking and being out in the woods..turns out these hikes and being in the woods was no more than the local parks gravel path. I was so millennial and ghosted her.

  6. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by eggymane View Post
    If you question the validity of this assessment check out the "Hikers" Facebook page. 99.999% of these hikers are no more than an hour from their vehicles.

    I was talking to a girl here for a while who talked about how much she liked hiking and being out in the woods..turns out these hikes and being in the woods was no more than the local parks gravel path. I was so millennial and ghosted her.
    And, she enjoyed being in the woods and walking. Half the battle over already. So all you had to do was broaden her experience horizon...

    But, you seem to be looking for a specific type of hiker. Maybe kinda a hard-core long-distance gal. A ready-made hiking/life partner. Who is going to be attracted to you as well. That sorta turns your dating pool into a shot glass.

    How's it working out so far?

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by mml373 View Post
    ... cannot imagine ever being with someone who doesn't have a passion for the trail.

    ..., looking to find someone who understands this whole active lifestyle/backpacking thing that so many of us here enjoy...
    Is backpacking your only interest? Expand your horizons a bit. People are people. If someone finds you interesting, they might adopt your passions; you might adopt theirs. If someone finds you one-dimensional, they are less likely to follow you into the woods. Take a community ed class, go to a church social, join a co-ed softball league...Be a bit more open to possibilities.

    If you insist on meeting this ONE magical hiking female...She is already happy on the trail, so move on or be alone.

    Good Luck

  8. #28

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    Quote Originally Posted by ScareBear View Post
    And, she enjoyed being in the woods and walking. Half the battle over already. So all you had to do was broaden her experience horizon...

    But, you seem to be looking for a specific type of hiker. Maybe kinda a hard-core long-distance gal. A ready-made hiking/life partner. Who is going to be attracted to you as well. That sorta turns your dating pool into a shot glass.

    How's it working out so far?
    If I wanted to train a hiking partner I'd get a dog! Haha

  9. #29
    Registered User theinfamousj's Avatar
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    I am female, single, desirable (based on the number of suitors I attract), and like me some backpacking.

    But someone so singularly focused on just one hobby? Pass.

    I am multifaceted and am looking for someone who can understand what that is like.

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  10. #30
    Registered User mml373's Avatar
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    Totally appreciate all the wonderful perspectives here, and also appreciate that most responders too my original post in the way it was intended. Sorry to see that some have been burned by love to the point of wanting to stay single, but can certainly understand that perspective as well...or at least the part about being comfortable in one's singleness. As the author of that post pointed out, there are WORSE things than being alone (i.e., being in a bad marriage.)

    Hiking is but one aspect of my numerous and varied interests, and I do understand that there are other things that are more important in terms of compatibility/long-term relationship success than sharing of a hobby. Still, it is one thing (of many) I would like to share with someone special.

    I'll take some of the responses to heart. Totally concur with the notion of going along and doing things regardless of whether there's a Miss next to me. The Meetups are tough to get into around here, due to my schedule, but I'll at least try to make the standby lists. Somehow I have the feeling I'm not alone in terms of having a job that can get in the way of having a social life!

    Indeed, one of the reasons I want to get out on the Trail is to be with other folks (besides coworkers at the office, LOL) and to learn/experience camaraderie. Plans for my SOBO hike have changed...I'll be going NOBO, when I go.
    Last edited by mml373; 05-13-2017 at 05:58.
    Planning for a North-South thru-hike to begin...one of these days...

  11. #31
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    try PinkBlaze.net

  12. #32
    Getting out as much as I can..which is never enough. :) Mags's Avatar
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    Do what you normally enjoy doing and have fun. The rest falls into place.

    And, as said above, good to have more than just one passion. Substitute obsessive STAMP COLLECTING for obsessive backpacking, and would you want to be with that person?

    A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.

    ...and specialization makes for a boring person, too.
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  13. #33
    Registered User egilbe's Avatar
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    Hikers are already mobile and tbe experience changes with every footstep, with every change of seasons. The commonality is being outdoors. In the Winter I ski and snowshoe. In the Summer I walk. It doesn't have to be a long distance hike every day. Some days we stay home and watch Star Trek Voyageur. Some days we look for waterfalls. Some days it's bagging a 4k'er in NH. It's always different and it all started with a walk in a local park.

  14. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by theinfamousj View Post
    I am female, single, desirable (based on the number of suitors I attract), and like me some backpacking.

    But someone so singularly focused on just one hobby? Pass.

    I am multifaceted and am looking for someone who can understand what that is like.

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    I hear you, but I do think there are hobbies where its more difficult to meet someone with the same level of interest. And there are hobbies that mean more shared time doing them, like a longer backpacking trip, as opposed to an evening at an art studio. So being focused on finding someone that likes hiking/backpacking on the same level is a worthwhile singular focus, I think, in the short term anyway.

    I'll use tennis as an example... lots of people play tennis, or I should say, they think they play tennis. If I want to meet someone I can enjoy going to the courts with, it needs to be someone that can keep up with me. Even better if I have to keep up with them. Probably don't want to meet someone where tennis is their life, so yeah, I don't want to meet someone with that singular focus. But if enjoying the sport I love with someone I love (eventually) is important to me, then I'm going to focus my efforts there first.
    "I wonder if anyone else has an ear so tuned and sharpened as I have, to detect the music, not of the spheres, but of earth, subtleties of major and minor chord that the wind strikes upon the tree branches. Have you ever heard the earth breathe... ?"
    - Kate Chopin

  15. #35
    Registered User theinfamousj's Avatar
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    Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

    And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

    I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.

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  16. #36
    Registered User FooFooCuddlyPoops's Avatar
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    Being single with a love for the outdoors kinda sucks, and kinda doesn't. On the plus side, you don't have to worry about scheduling hikes between two sets of work days. You don't have to worry about whether or not your partner can make the hike psyhically. But, it would be nice to do something with someone you care about. I would love to be able to show them the side of me that loves to find wild edibles, scale little rock cliffs, and climb trees. The side that most don't think I have at 230lbs, 5'2. Most do not see me as anything other than another bad eating, fat girl that. In reality, I am the person that backpacks and hikes more miles than most. I am part of a bunch of different meet-up.

  17. #37
    Registered User scope's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uncle Joe View Post
    I like the mountains and being outside. My next partner probably should as well. I'm all for mutual respect but if you were married for years and developed a love for hiking during that marriage that's one thing. If you love to hike and be in nature and are single, you're probably going to want to find someone with at least some love of that and not just an understanding and acceptance of it.
    Quote Originally Posted by theinfamousj View Post
    Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

    And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

    I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.
    And that's why its not the method by which I chose my wife. That said, if I were single again, especially at my age, I have a much clearer idea of where my time goes, and I'd want to have a partner where time spent at least had a greater opportunity of being together than being apart. Not disagreeing with anything you just said, but I do think there's more you might have read into it than was intended. Perhaps Uncle Joe said it in more simple terms.
    "I wonder if anyone else has an ear so tuned and sharpened as I have, to detect the music, not of the spheres, but of earth, subtleties of major and minor chord that the wind strikes upon the tree branches. Have you ever heard the earth breathe... ?"
    - Kate Chopin

  18. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by theinfamousj View Post
    Yeah, but you cannot custom order a partner. You will never meet someone who exactly shares your skill and exactly shares the length of your interest in a thing.

    And to be honest, a partner insisting that they not take trips longer than I want to be out for simply because I am not with them and they daren't substitute a different buddy stinks of codependency which is a much bigger red flag than someone who time budgets most of their time to one particular hobby.

    I would feel the same whether this be hiking or tennis. If you need me to be by your side or else you won't do it, even when doing it brings you joy, then you need a therapist not a girlfriend.

    Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk
    +1

    It is nice to share a hobby, but if your hobby is a passion, you'd better be willing to compromise on the skill level if your future partner shares the passion but not the skill. I live in St. Louis. The odds of meeting a single gal my age that can ski as well as I can and has the money and free time to do it as much as I do is slim, then you have to be attracted to each other...

    It's better, IMHO, that she shares the joy of skiing and goes when she can and skis what she can and when she can't she doesn't begrudge me my black run if she's on a blue, or a week or two out West without her if she has to work, or can't afford it. It would be hard enough to find somebody that can adjust to my work and family schedule, let alone my hobbies!

    But, if she isn't going to play nice if I go somewhere to do a multi-day athletic endeavor without her if she can't/doesn't want to go, then that is the deal-breaker. Too dependent on being together is no bueno...

  19. #39

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    Quote Originally Posted by eggymane View Post
    Hike on a busy trail during a bubble. Seriously, I've met more awesome girls there than anywhere. Bonus- unless your mouth is sewn shut the trail provides the perfect ice breaker for any situation.
    Yup
    Ive met several women on trails, all ages and status.
    Perfect icebreaker
    Married or not, a couple I spent a camp or more with are long time friends and stay in touch via fbook

    If your in the market, it can be called networking.

  20. #40
    Registered User mml373's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ScareBear View Post
    +1

    It is nice to share a hobby, but if your hobby is a passion, you'd better be willing to compromise on the skill level if your future partner shares the passion but not the skill. I live in St. Louis. The odds of meeting a single gal my age that can ski as well as I can and has the money and free time to do it as much as I do is slim, then you have to be attracted to each other...

    It's better, IMHO, that she shares the joy of skiing and goes when she can and skis what she can and when she can't she doesn't begrudge me my black run if she's on a blue, or a week or two out West without her if she has to work, or can't afford it. It would be hard enough to find somebody that can adjust to my work and family schedule, let alone my hobbies!

    But, if she isn't going to play nice if I go somewhere to do a multi-day athletic endeavor without her if she can't/doesn't want to go, then that is the deal-breaker. Too dependent on being together is no bueno...

    I totally agree...have seen that side of relationships, too, and have RUN away from it. Codependency is the other end of the spectrum and is certainly something folks have to recognize and address if it is present.

    Ah, dating in St. Louis. Good to see there are a number of us St. Louisians here.

    Totally love the perspectives folks have offered here.
    Planning for a North-South thru-hike to begin...one of these days...

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