when you fart, do you push?

[mweinstone]

cause it seems like hikers revere volume. is it the food? or are they trying to compete in some way?

forced burping? same question.

[Lone Wolf]

can't push too hard, you'll draw mud

[Johnny Thunder]

Yesterday I farted the longest continuous flatulence of my life. It was like I was breathing in my mouth and out my butt. No push, just lots of dairy. No volume, just power.

[Creek Dancer]

Yes, sometimes competition is involved, such as with Fart Baseball. Check with Commissioner Hog On Ice for the rules.

[taildragger]

can't push too hard, you'll draw mud

He's right, farting isn't the kinda business where you wanna pass gas and strike oil.

[Footslogger]

cause it seems like hikers revere volume. is it the food? or are they trying to compete in some way?

forced burping? same question.

==============================

No "push" needed here. Relief ...not competition.

Gas happens - both northward and southward ...

'Slogger

[jlb2012]

dang it Creek Dancer - ever since I called on you to Pinch Hit its been nothing butt trouble

[Tipi Walter]

Farting can often be the first sign or first labor pains in the emergence of a newborn Turtlehead, and all care must accordingly be paid to the proper birthing technique and proper future-home hole placement of said Colon Lizard, especially when on a long backpacking trip. The closest a grown man comes to death without actually dying occurs between the fart and the birthing of a Young William, sometimes done in a tent on paper towels set aside just for this purpose(especially in winter, hopefully, ONLY in winter).

The emergence of a raging, hot and hostile Turtlehead is oftimes preceeded by a series of droning farts, signaling the soon arrival of the young newborn, it is nature's way to prepare a man to begin deep breathing, proper bung placement and to line up assistants if any are needed. Sadly, the fresh living turtlehead is immediately smothered and buried, but for a short time a man can develop quite a touching relationship to this perky off-colored offspring, though so quickly wiped away and discarded. The fart, therefore, is like the distant muffled crying whine of the deeply throated Turd, in its own way and in its own language signalling its soon arrival.

[Creek Dancer]

LOL, well that was out of left field.

dang it Creek Dancer - ever since I called on you to Pinch Hit its been nothing butt trouble

[EWS]

Farting can often be the first sign or first labor pains in the emergence of a newborn Turtlehead, and all care must accordingly be paid to the proper birthing technique and proper future-home hole placement of said Colon Lizard, especially when on a long backpacking trip. The closest a grown man comes to death without actually dying occurs between the fart and the birthing of a Young William, sometimes done in a tent on paper towels set aside just for this purpose(especially in winter, hopefully, ONLY in winter).

The emergence of a raging, hot and hostile Turtlehead is oftimes preceeded by a series of droning farts, signaling the soon arrival of the young newborn, it is nature's way to prepare a man to begin deep breathing, proper bung placement and to line up assistants if any are needed. Sadly, the fresh living turtlehead is immediately smothered and buried, but for a short time a man can develop quite a touching relationship to this perky off-colored offspring, though so quickly wiped away and discarded. The fart, therefore, is like the distant muffled crying whine of the deeply throated Turd, in its own way and in its own language signalling its soon arrival.

Wow, I laughed, cried, pondered, tried not to visualize and made a note not to let you borrow my tent.

[taildragger]

Farting can often be the first sign or first labor pains in the emergence of a newborn Turtlehead, and all care must accordingly be paid to the proper birthing technique and proper future-home hole placement of said Colon Lizard, especially when on a long backpacking trip. The closest a grown man comes to death without actually dying occurs between the fart and the birthing of a Young William, sometimes done in a tent on paper towels set aside just for this purpose(especially in winter, hopefully, ONLY in winter).

The emergence of a raging, hot and hostile Turtlehead is oftimes preceeded by a series of droning farts, signaling the soon arrival of the young newborn, it is nature's way to prepare a man to begin deep breathing, proper bung placement and to line up assistants if any are needed. Sadly, the fresh living turtlehead is immediately smothered and buried, but for a short time a man can develop quite a touching relationship to this perky off-colored offspring, though so quickly wiped away and discarded. The fart, therefore, is like the distant muffled crying whine of the deeply throated Turd, in its own way and in its own language signalling its soon arrival.

http://www.southparkzone.com/episode...More-Crap.html

[Summit]

This thread is nothing but a bunch of hot air!

[TOW]

Us fat people know how to pass wind....................whoooooosh!!!!

[hopefulhiker]

I have often wondered whether it is better to fart or to hold on an uphill.. Since much of the fart is lighter than air is there a "hot balloon effect" to help the hiker up the hill or is it better to fart freely??

[The Weasel]

Actually, pushing is a very critical skill for ultralight backpackers, at least those who want to heat their food while avoiding bringing an external, nonbiological stove. It involves not only the ability to provide a smooth flow of methane for the time necessary to adequately heat the food but also the ability to maintain the appropriate position beneath a grill stand for the pot. Most fart cookers try to avoid the need to boil water, since the length of time necessary to fully heat the water usually involves ingesting food/fuel, which is somewhat self-defeating (as well as difficult while kneeling unde the grill). As a result, it is most effective to simply heat an appropriate food/fuel item to an edible level of warmth. Canned beans seem to be an optimal such item, although any food cooked with rehydrated dried milk seems to be useful, as well.

TW

[Deadeye]

The key is to push and squeeze simultaneously, thus producing a long, drawn out note, without a brown blaze.

[Footslogger]

Just a caution though ...farting, whether push-assisted or not, while wearing rainpants can cause severe short term inflation and near blinding escape vapors.

'Slogger

[The Weasel]

The key is to push and squeeze simultaneously, thus producing a long, drawn out note, without a brown blaze.

Brown blazing is not an appropriate way to complete the Appalachian Trail. ATC Regulation 9.1(b)(3), subpart G, dealing with environmentally improper hiking standards, states that "Any hiker engaging in brown blazing will be denied issuance of the "Sanitary Thru Hiker" certificate."

TW

[gold bond]

Two bacon and chedder roast beef sandwiches with curley fries...two of us crammed in a Mnt Hdw PCT 2...cold and raining.....lets just say I was at my best that night and my wife used words that I never new exsisted!!!
We had to air out the bags the next day for sure!!

[Creek Dancer]

This thread stinks.