Wow, I was in a sad mood and now my stomach hurts bad from laughing.Originally Posted by mweinstone
What makes it soooo damn funny is that it's most likely true.
Right? That one caught me by surprise.
Skids
Insanity: Asking about inseams over and over again and expecting different results.
Albert Einstein, (attributed)
Oh Matty!!! I miss you and the laughs you bring!!
Can't wait to hang out with you at one of these weird yet fun trashgivings!!
I gotta stop working so hard and come out to play more.
If you don't have something nice to say,
Be witty in your cruelty.
Ditch the apostrophe - decisions, decisions.Decision's, dicision's????? Do I want to hang out with Jack or Ron.
You absolutely want to hang with Jack.
As I live, declares the Lord God, I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that the wicked turn back from his way and live. Ezekiel 33:11
i belive i wont be attending. thank you dude for the ride offer.sorry jack i missed your birthtime. i got job hunting to do. matthewski.
matthewskis virtual thanksgiving
youve been driveing some time now. your gps stopped getting signal and has gone intermittent . your close to glencliff. maby 4 miles away. the lady on the gps just keeps saying, recalculating, recalculating..
you relize stubbornly that all your planning has not accounted for the need of map at this last junkture
smartys have circled the route on the last 5 miles and have all the street crossing names on the last road written on a paper.
dummys and nubees pull over and fumble for map and light and pencil
now you have the correct last crosstreet to start looking for anything that resembles a hostle, after.
unfortunatly its pitch dark. and the hiker hostle looks like any other house at night in the off season.
suddenly your headlights catch matthewskis eyes and headlamp.
you are done driveing. waveing hands and acting strangely , matthewski welcoms you to park .
not knowing anything about matthewski, you may decide to remain in your locked car untill mattheskis next need for heat, every 5 minutes your nuts freeze on the road and one must return to warm agin the fine flow o heat from jacks belly.
i digress,.....the sounds and smells comming from the cool ass hostle packrat has built and loaned us are intreeging to you. you enter the unheated porch. blister sister has lit candels around the many many plates and bowls of food people have brought. an abundance of the coolest appetizers and wines and cheeses, deer meat and mystry meats await you in this entrance porch of unheated chillery.
you look at the door to the inner rooms and open it into a waft of heat, fart and food. inside is a maze of weird disturbingly large amounts of foods all layed out in splendor on long tables for your munching needs. people of all smells and ages abound loudly drinking and listening to jester talk about stuff.nearby mattheski and a plethera of volenteers lay out foods as they arive and wash dishes constantly for people looking for feeding implements. wows and whats thats abound. you need to pee. the bathroom becomes your sanctuary of solice. inches beyond the calm reality of your inner bath, abound hords of loud excited hikers and maintainers and jacks and dudes and women full of good cheer. you pee, then return, opening the door, your peacefull bath exsperience is over. you now have an empty bladder and go at it. soon, you are the noise. you are the food. you are the hot women. you are in! later you walk outside and stare at mattys and panzers and a few others tents bravely pitched and wonder. then you go to the hostile sleepindg area and snag a bunk in the coolass barnlike structure, or one of many weird qunsit huts or freak houses to set up your warmest down sleeping bag and pillow and puke bucket if needed. returning to the hostil you relize just how safe and sound you are way up in new england. missle silos surround you. safley, you hit on chicks.
Gee, I never heard that one before.
im goin. no matter what. period. end of silly. begin first stage dummass ejection systems. restart mat motors. inishiate dude link.preparing baltimore jack section of pack. downloading dead baby response algerithems. starting cammo carriers for loading cammo to bed in case he drinks 2 gigantic monk beers
slathering skin with anticold cream for hotty hottyness. onboard projectile puke sreens aimed and focused on dummys. begin fueling desperation for moosalaki hike. exterior chick platform loaded . "roger roll matty roll,....we have a major funtion,..." huston?
dude dude dude
why you so crude?
you fart you burp and boogie pick too
but i love you
dont ever let me see you nude
cause on that day
ill call you gay
and slap your butt with a rattail wet towel
and all rhyming will stop
youll call a cop
ill say,..hey, i saw his pants drop
so? the cop will ask
and then it will be my task
to exsplaine the horror.
oxoxoooxfatty
Laughing my freakin Buttox off Matty - Miss you.
Blister "Bitchen" Sister
Wow. Matty's posts leave me awestruck and speechless. For those interested, we will indeed be having our post Thanksgiving hiker get-together, "Trashgiving", and it'll be 3-5 December, i.e. in 2 weeks, with most stuff (and yeah, let's be blunt,most of the food) on Saturday the 4th. This is the only annual American holiday I know of devoted simultaneously to hiking and gluttony and it is open to everyone. Definite location to be announced within days, watch this space, but it will certainly be somewhere near Mt. Moosilauke in central New Hampshire. Details to follow, sure hope to see many of you there......
wow. didnt know it was the third. max comes home from cali on the 3rd. not comming.hes only here for a week then in austrailia for a month visiting his mom. only time i have with my son in the last 3 months plus. sorry.not commin. i never new the dates. truly apologize for being so dumb.the gathering , if it were in erwin, at miss janets moms where shes remoleding her cabin , on a farm with goats and tons of chickens that need to be eaten, might be fun. we used to have thanksgiving at miss janets and she needs a visit from her hiker family. not tryin to move it, i love the north, but the chickens and goats witch abound and are alot of work to keep need to be reduced and eaten. we would be doing a service to the janets.just sayin. and if it could be a week later , to maby give enough time to get ready in a new spot , if needed,...would be great for me. but alas,i also hope we could use the hostel in gleencliff. and the church in erwin where we used to eat would be fun if we could get it and then go to janets to hug. but i know jack and blister will figure everything out. god bless hikers. each and every one.
Dude, you'll never let me live that one down, eh?
Methinks thou dost exaggerate about being left speechless.
At any rate, I have several prior commitments that weekend, so (unfortunately) I'll not be in attendance...
Sierra Tango Foxtrot Uniform
Eyeballin'
Cant make it either...........
Thank you for the mention Matty, I also will not be able to attend. I fly back into Hartford on the 3rd. Any other weekend would have worked. Oh well.
Blister "Bitchen" Sister
what we have here is a lack of...
me being in charge enough. oh i know ive got my charges. dishwashing. trashing,vale serveses and such. but just for a moment imagine if you will me being the pharoh of fun. the emporer of exstasy. the lord of lalygagging. heres how i would swing my mighty power and weild my weildings.
first. we send an advance team of squatters to squat a spot for our fun. three to five hikers is all i need. we pick a state and somewhere on the trail build a home. a quansit or tee pee style structure very large and made of natural materials and some tarp.something alog the lines of 100 feet by 60 feet or three rolls of sheeting 100 by 20 each. used in a way to create a space dry and heatable and wind resistant. maby a circus style tent. and we have trashgiving near enough to a roadhead with motel or campground options close for the non camping.i know a spot but want other suggestions cause this one sucks. sorry. jack! wake up! go outside and look up! close your eyes and think jack!find trashgiving! go beyond it jack! go to where trashgiving is in the fixed timestreem of unitime. now open them,....where are we jack?! what has happened!? do you see trashgiving? or shadow and no turkey? witch jack? hurry!do this my bidding .
Sorry those days don't work for everyone but in recent years, we've had success with the weekend after Thanksgiving.......we can't do it BEFORE Thanksgiving; we can't do it Thanksgiving weekend as many folks are away or with their families, etc., and we can't have it too late in December as it gets too close to Christmas. Unfortunately, no matter what days we pick wouldn't work well for someone.......some of us work weekends and can't get away at all; some of us work retail and can't take off any time in December, etc. In recent years, the weekend right after Thanksgiving has worked out well for us but I'm sorry it doesn't work for everyone.
Matty, I'd love to spend some time in Tennessee this time of year but we'll probably have to wait til Janet gets settled into a new permanent location.
we have a place!
big john has told me to tell you hes down with trashgiving at his farm! its south east of glencliff by 20 miles so its closer to all and he has a industrial greenhouse so large it contains an airstreem camper in it. wood stove, 40 acres , his house with basement and kitch and baths. hes just waiting for the okay. i have his number. mine is 215 668 0898.he said we will have a bondfire and all!
big john of moonbow gear rocks. will be fun for all. cant make it . this is my gift. i give you,.....sir big johns farm. godspeed. dude, hes calling you.closest AT? dartmoth ski area i belive. bout 5 mi.
Will be last min but i belive that After a Black Friday int he ratil world I will more than ready for Trashgiving. Have even talked to Tank about ride share so we reduce our carbon foot print which means you can spend more time and carbon cooking great things!
Often Accused, Often Guilty but Seldom Guilty of What I am Accused.
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